Lamai The Farm Girl by the Mekong River
Story 1 The Watch Ultimatum A Sensible Decision
I went to Thailand in 2017 and met two friends in Pattaya. It was my first time to Pattaya, so they would show me around all the best toys and bars to visit. We started our bar crawl most evenings at about 9:00 p.m. We ended up going to Soi 6 or 7 I can’t remember which one now. Anyway, I was pulled into one of the bars by a bunch of females. As soon as we entered, the manager tried to pair us off with girls. The women were average in appearance and barely spoke any English, but we were so drunk that we didn’t care.
A few hours later, I found myself talking to another girl and not the girl I was hooked up with in the bar. This other girl spoke almost perfect English and was a stunner. I thought she was a bar girl, so I tried to make a move on her. She refused my attentions and made it clear she was not interested. It turns out that she was a friend of the bar owner’s son and was there to have a few free drinks. I apologized and told her it’s my first time in Thailand and Pattaya, and she just laughed it off and accepted my apology.
At around 1:00 a.m., my friends and I decided to go to Walking Street. Far (who was the girl I had apologized to) and her friends the owner’s son and a few other ladies from the bar came with us. We went into plenty of bars along Walking Street for drinks. Far and I were getting closer. We were dancing with each other and became extremely flirty. We even kissed a few times.
I wanted to take her back to my hotel or at least carry on the night but I had no idea if she was up for it. I didn’t know if Thai girls are like that and if they were that easy or not, or if I’d have to work at it a bit more. I knew she was single, and she wasn’t with the bar owner’s son because he was gay. In the end, it seemed like Far made the decision for us, because as it was getting light outside, she turned to me and said, “When are we going back to yours?” We all know what happened after that.
We would have daily aerobic sessions when she would come up to my hotel after work. She worked as a tattoo artist. Some days we would go out to the mall or restaurants or cinema, and I would splash out for both of us. I was earning really good money, so I didn’t mind splashing out. Sometimes I would give her money to get her hair done or get a massage or buy a couple of bottles for us at the bars and clubs.
The Watch
One day she was looking at one of my watches. It was expensive I had been given it as a gift from my father. She then told me that her birthday was coming soon and she wanted a similar watch as a present. I thought she was just thinking out loud, but then she demanded that I buy her one because “I have a lot of money.” I just laughed and jokingly said, “Tomorrow.” Every time she would bring it up, I would say, “Tomorrow.”
Far’s birthday was getting closer. We were shopping in the mall next to the Hilton Hotel, and I walked past we walked past an expensive watch shop. She dragged me in and told me which watch she wanted. I showed no interest.
That night, after a session of aerobics, she asked me again if I was going to buy the watch for her with a serious face. I told her no. She got up and gave me the ultimate ultimatum: buy her the watch or she will leave. So I opened the door and said, “Goodbye.” She started crying and left immediately. I went to sleep.
The next morning, I got a barrage of texts and missed calls from Far. She kept saying how sorry she was and that she wanted to get back together and that she misses me. I decided that I was in too deep I should cut it off as soon as I can. I was also a bit paranoid that she might do something extreme or foolish, so I blocked her number and moved to another hotel in Jomtien.
As I was unpacking my stuff at the new hotel in Jomtien, I realized that I was missing a bottle of expensive aftershave. I went back to the hotel I just left and searched the room I had stayed in, but it wasn’t there. I then remembered how Far would always use my cologne especially the missing bottle, as she said it was her favorite and she wanted one. That’s when I realized she took my cologne.
Anyway, to conclude this story I stayed in Pattaya for too long. What was supposed to be a five day stay ended up being a two and a half week stay because of Far. I didn’t have long left, so I decided to head back to Bangkok and finish the rest of my vacation with my friends. And if you’re wondering what happened to Far well, she found me on Facebook, but I didn’t accept her friend request I just blocked her.
Story 2 The Drunk Passenger A Disgusting Tale Warning
I have a story to share with you that has equally amused and grossed out my friends when I’ve told it to them.
When traveling to and from Thailand, because there are no direct flights from the northeast of England, I normally fly to Bangkok via Dubai with Emirates airline with a two- to six-hour layover, depending on direction and which one of their flights from Dubai to Bangkok I can get booked on. After a fun two weeks in Thailand in February of 2020 visiting Bangkok, Hua Hin, and Udon Thani and some of its stunning cities it was time to make my way back home.
As I was traveling down from Isan, I booked the last Thai Smile flight from Udon Thani at about 8:00 p.m. an easy one hour flight to Bangkok, arriving a little after 9:00 p.m. With Emirates out of Bangkok to Dubai, there are three flight choices: 9:30 p.m. (which wouldn’t work out with the flight coming from Udon Thani), 1:30 a.m. (the flight I was booked on), and 2:30 a.m. (which leaves a very tight connection time to Dubai).
After landing in Bangkok, I proceeded to head through domestic arrivals to pick up my luggage, then head to the exit and go up to the fourth floor to check in for my next flight. The Emirates check-in counters is on Row T or U the opposite end to where I came up the escalators from domestic arrivals. So after weaving in and out of the crowds of tourists, I finally made it to the row and joined the queue for check in.
The queue was quite long, snaking backwards and forwards on itself several times through the cordoning setup, but with lots of counters open, a couple of friendly Thai staff to guide you to the correct line, and then a few more at the front prompting people to the next counter as soon as one became free including sending people to counters reserved for first class, business groups, etc. The queue moved at a steady pace, and before long I was on the last leg of the queue, facing the counters.
The Old Man
It was while there that I noticed an older, grey-haired guy come up the channel that they had set up as an exit to funnel you out towards departures once you’ve finished checking in. This guy was looking to jump the queue and was making his way to the last counter once it became available. A Thai male airline staff member who was marshalling the front of the queue quickly spotted him and rushed up to explain that he’d come up the exit and he has to go back and join the queue like everybody else. The older man just stood there mumbling, slurring something, but ignoring any instructions.
By this point, I’d moved forward a little and had a better view of the man. He was in a T shirt and a pair of white shorts that were heavily stained yellow around the crotch area.
After a few more attempts at persuasion with the help of a female colleague including trying to lead him by the elbow didn’t work, I assumed the airport workers must have given up for an easy life and decided to allow the old man to jump the queue and proceed to check in on the last counter once it became available.
He tried to check in with something that wasn’t a passport overhearing the two airport staff trying to get through to the slurring man who was speaking some kind of broken drunken English, being rude and acting like the Thais were in the wrong, that he needed a passport to check in. What he handed over wasn’t a passport and looked from a distance like the card holders hotels give you to keep your room key in, etc. This went on for a few minutes. They eventually got him to open his bum bag and found his passport and proceeded to check him in and put his cases on the scales.
It was while doing this that I noticed the two Thais suddenly jumped back slightly. And because he didn’t have the two Thais blocking the view, everyone could see the man standing swaying at the counter had started to urinate there at the counter. It was flowing out of the bottom of his shorts and splashing up off the floor.
Now, the Thais being polite and not wanting to draw any attention or embarrass the guy carried on as normal until he was gone, and then set about the job of cleaning up his mess. To say the people in the queue were shocked would be an understatement. But there was worse to come. After he was finished at the counter and turned to leave, we got a view of what could have possibly been the reason the Thais let him jump the queue to begin with to quickly get him out of their way. We now had a very clear view of the back of his white shorts. Well, what was once white shorts were very heavy brown stains and soiling all over the back of the shorts. We couldn’t believe what we were seeing. And the thought was certainly running through my head that he had checked in his hold luggage and had no hand luggage so no possible way of changing out of those shorts and into some fresh clothes. My next thought was: there are only two Emirates flights open, so I now had a 50/50 chance of being on the same flight as this smelly drunk, and some unfortunate person is going to have to sit next to him for six hours to Dubai. Talk about a way to ruin the end of your holiday. Check in proceeded as normal after that, although a little slower as the Thais closed a few of the counters while the cleanup operation got underway.
The Flight
Later on, after the usual check in and departure stuff, I proceeded to the gate for boarding and shock horror, the older man was on my flight, and he was still wearing those white shorts, which were now looking worse than ever. Were there mere stains? I knew someone was going to have to be the unlucky person and sit next to him on the flight.
They started boarding by zone. I was waiting for zone B to be called, and all the while hoping he would be boarded into a different zone and therefore a different section of the aircraft. They proceeded D, then E, then F. Thank God he boarded at this point, and I was more than happy that the zone I was in was the last to board.
I settled into the flight and relaxed and never thought about the old man again for the rest of the flight. At Dubai, there was a delay with one of the walkways, so the area of the plane I was on was the last to disembark, and I was in no particular rush as I had a two and a half hour transit. I took my time, so never saw the older man getting off the plane.
After a bit of a walk around and refueling on snacks, I went to the departure gate for the flight back to Newcastle. It was while waiting to get into the gate I noticed him at the opposite gate waiting for the same flight that was also continuing to Manchester. Thankfully, he no longer had those shorts on and was instead wearing a pair of jogging pants. How he got them, I will never know. Did he purchase them in Dubai? Did some kind stranger give him a change of clothes? Did the airline give them to him and make him change so as not to upset the other passengers?
Now, I know it’s probably wrong of me to laugh or judge this person not knowing his circumstances or any possible medical conditions that could have contributed to the state he found himself in on that day or if it is a simple case of what most people I’ve told this story to think it is: an older man having too much fun on the last day of his holiday and too much to drink. But I think there’s one thing everyone can agree on, and that is: wearing a pair of white shorts all day and then on a night flight is a very bad idea unless you have a change of clothes in your hand luggage.
All right, so let’s move into a much more pleasant story.
Story 3 Lamai The Farm Girl by the Mekong River
I met a girl Lamai a few years ago. She lived in a tiny village on the bank of the Mekong River. She worked with her dad in the rice paddies. I went to visit her, and we harvested rice together the old-fashioned way using a sickle. I was wearing flip flops and a thong, so it made people worry that I might cut my foot or toes.
Lamai knew how to stay beautiful and slim with no makeup. She always covered her face to protect her skin from the sun only her eyes were ever visible in the rice fields. She also covered her arms and wore gloves, protecting her delicate skin from the scorching heat of the day. When evening came, she always asked, “Let’s go to the river.” She would tie a traditional colorful sarong around her body. We would both splash each other on the edge of the river. The current on the river here is strong as it runs into Cambodia.
Lamai was fond of watching Thai boxing, so once a week in the village, she always had a brother or a cousin or friend. In the evening, we would make our way to the local boxer match. Before the fight, Lamai would massage her brother or cousin who were to take part in the boxing. This seems to be quite normal in Thai culture. We would then sit on Thai mats and wait with anticipation as the drums beat and the crowds were getting more excited.
Lamai had never been a bar girl. In fact, she knew very little of such things that went on in big cities such as Bangkok and Pattaya. Her native tongue is Lao, and Thai Isan used to be part of Laos many years ago. If she caught me looking at another woman in the village, she would say to me, “It’s okay, you can go with her. I’m only a poor farm girl. No worries, tilak.” Sometimes I was looking at her I would tell her she was like a rose. She would reply, “No, I’m an orchard, not a rose,” with a smile on her face. Bit cheeky, really.
Sometimes I forgot that I’m in a country of such beauty and just like that, I was gone. I had left this beautiful creature behind to return to Udon Thani.
Searching for Her Father
After some time, I got in contact with Lamai and asked her if she could come and join me in Udon Thani if I paid the ticket which was a four hour bus ride away. She told me that her father was ill in hospital and that she could not come to me. I asked, “Where’s your father?” She said, “I’m in Udon Thani which hospital?” She said, “The provincial hospital.” This is a government hospital for poor people of Isan.
The next day, I went to the provincial hospital. It was a complex of buildings like a campus. I went to the first building, but I did not know the name of Lamai’s father. I searched the first floor every room and every bed. Each room has about 10 beds in it. Each floor has about 20 rooms. I checked all four floors. People saw me going from bed to bed looking for Lamai’s father. Most people took pity on me. They all knew I was searching for a loved one. It was a huge task with many rooms and many beds, but I persisted in my search. Lamai could not explain which ward her father was on.
Then I went to the second building and scanned every room, every bed. I did this for the entire day. But unfortunately, due to the language barrier and the lack of information, I did not find Lamai’s father in the rooms that I had searched. As said, it’s a huge complex of buildings. I went back to my guesthouse exhausted but not defeated.
The next day, I went on a mission to search the third building. When I got to the third floor, I found Lamai’s father. Don’t ask me how I don’t know myself. He was in a deep sleep. Some people in the room tried to wake him up. I said, “No, let him sleep. I can wait here until he wakes.” They were all very kind and brought me a chair to sit in until her father woke up. After about 30 minutes, he opened his eyes, saw me, and gave me a big smile. I could read his eyes he sent messages of gratitude as he nodded to me with a beatific look of satisfaction on his face.
After a while, I went out of the hospital to get him some food from one of the food carts. This was a government hospital the food is basic, to say the least.
The Sad News
Then came time for me to cross the Mekong and return to Laos. Weeks later, I was browsing Facebook and saw photos of Lamai. She was always shining like a full moon over the Mekong. I was intrigued when I saw all her brothers and cousins had shaved their heads. I found out that there had been a death in the family. Being a Buddhist culture, all of the men shaved their heads as a sign of respect.
I waited for a week to pass, then I called Lamai. She said to me, “Father was sleeping, and when he opened his eyes, he saw you next to him. It was his best moment at the hospital. You made him happy. We thank you for visiting Father.” She finished by saying, “Father no more.”
It made me sorry. It made me sadder than I had ever been in my life. Lamai is still tending the farm sowing, planting, and harvesting rice and corn with her family. She still goes to the Mekong River to bathe at night. I close my eyes and I see her in her colorful sarong bathing in the murky Mekong River.
This is a very short story that is told by a nostalgic drifter me trying to adjust to life back in the West.
Story 4 A Success Story From Bar Girl to Family Life
I have recently turned 57. I’m five foot two, slim, never taken drugs, full set of my own teeth, non-smoker, and infrequent drinker by choice. I exercise like a demon possessed on a mission to live to be over a hundred years. I have worked all my life, working my way up the ladder from operative to supervisor, site manager, contracts manager, and project manager working in the UK, Ireland, Germany, UAE, and presently in the UK.
Let me start at the beginning. 1998 my partner passed away from cancer, and my world fell apart. I stopped working in Germany and took a year off to re-evaluate my life. At that time, I was working in Germany. I would travel back to be with my partner every two to four months. Because I was earning good money, I wanted my partner to stop work and to enjoy her hobby of horse riding much more than she did, as we had two horses at the time. A perfect compromise time apart, a good income, a great lifestyle of Caribbean cruises, numerous trips to the US and Europe.
So now you have a better understanding of my life back then. I hope you can also understand the impact of losing my partner had on me mentally. One more important bit of information is that we did not have children which was a blessing in disguise, as this would have stopped me moving to Thailand. Sorry for rambling on, but I think this background information is important to my story. In short, I’ve had a perfect life. The stage is now set.
First Trip Songkran 1998
Songkran 1998 my partner’s best friend invited me to stay with her and her husband in Bangkok for two weeks to give me a break from the stress I was under, because I just couldn’t get over my wife’s death. I accepted their kind offer and flew out of Gatwick the following week to be picked up by the driver.
I spent a great week seeing all the tourist things and a couple of nights in Soi Cowboy in a bar called Rembrandt. There I met Ying. She was gorgeous, but I did not do anything with her due to the pain and sorrow I was still feeling. I sometimes played a couple of rounds of floodlit golf which I enjoyed, and I visited the historic city of Ayutthaya. Then we took a trip to Pattaya for two nights. My hosts were amazing taking care of me like a wounded animal, scared and traumatized, trying to get me to enjoy myself.
After spending a few hours in Walking Street, my two friends went back to the hotel (which was on Second Road it had two-way traffic back then) after encouraging me to stay out and enjoy myself. I met a girl, went back to the hotel for drinks with her, and gave her 300 baht for her time. That was the going rate back then. It was still too soon to be intimate with anyone I just enjoyed the girl’s company. After grieving alone for so long, I left Thailand with wonderful memories and a year later returned to work in Germany full time.
Meeting Beam and the Beer Bar
In 2003, I returned to Pattaya with my German best friend, and after meeting a bar girl named Beam, I fell in love. I am not the typical man that girls go for being small and slim, I never did attract much attention from the ladies, so the attention from Beam was welcomed. It’s not that I was desperate for female company, as I’ve had several German girlfriends and each time I ended the relationship I guess it was still too early after my partner’s death. However, with Beam, I felt it was time to fall in love, and this was so different the Asian skin and beauty of a Thai girl and the location was something I wanted to succumb to.
We got married after three months. I bought a beer bar in Soi 6 opposite Ruby Bar next to Gang’s Pub. I was living the life. After only six months, I felt like I was in a haze of beer bars and girls. I was not a good husband, and I also found that Beam was stealing money from me. She thought she saw me as a typical farang and she got what money she could out of me when she could. I did not give Beam a weekly allowance, but instead I gave her money to send to her mother in Bangkok to support her five-year-old son.
I ended the relationship with Beam and cut my losses. You might think my reaction was extreme, but I have read all the books and listened to other expat experiences. Beam was obviously not in love but more in the relationship for financial gain. I knew what I wanted and I was prepared to take the time and find the right girl. I didn’t want to give up on Thai girls or Thailand.
Meeting Junta
After a month and many relationships, I eventually hooked up with another bar girl from Soi 7 named Junta who was 27 at the time. Junta had a three-year-old daughter. I took Junta back to the bar in Soi 6, and World War 3 broke out as Beam had returned to collect her things. The bar staff and girls were protective of Beam but also knew she had stolen from me, so they calmed her down. For your information, I was liked by my staff because I never swore and I treated them all quite well.
So, being moved out, Junta moved in and it’s now 2004. I told Junta, “Bring your daughter to live with us.” I knew the bar scene is not the right environment to bring a child up. So in September 2004, I sold the bar, got back the key money, and I bought a house on On Nut just off Sukhumvit in Bangkok for 800,000 baht. I knocked down the house and built a bungalow. I then went back to work.
The next year 2005 we had our first child together (I’ve obviously changed the names). We had our first child together, Jenny, who was born. And three years later 2008 Karen was born. So I have three daughters: Nip (19, who is now at Rangsit University in Bangkok), Jenny (14), and Karen (11) both are at the same state school in Pattaya which Nip had attended. Jenny was accepted to all the best universities in Thailand to learn chemical engineering, and she decided to accept Rangsit due to its forward-thinking. Because Jenny achieved excellent school results, Rangsit University wanted her so much she received a scholarship, and I only had to pay 50% fees.
After Karen was born, I started a savings and insurance plan for my partner and paid in 48,000 pounds over seven years to pay for the children’s education. It matures in 2023 with a payout of 4 million Thai baht. It was a struggle to find the money every year, but it was the right thing to do. Thais do not usually think about tomorrow especially 15 years ahead but eventually Junta realized that after us being together for six years and me always planning for our retirement, planning for the future was the right thing to do.
The Secret to a Successful Relationship
I haven’t said much about my partner Junta. Well, we have been together now for 16 years not married. She’s never asked for a salary or money to send back to her mother, apart from 3,000 baht before Jenny started living with us. After being together for five months in the early days, a couple of Junta’s bar girlfriends would visit when I was away working in the UK, asking her lots of questions like: “How much money does a farang have?” and “How much money does a farang give her every month?” Junta said she receives nothing because everything she wants she can have. When she told her friends this, and that the house was in her name worth 3.5 million Thai baht, they got very jealous and now those so-called friends no longer contact Junta. Since then, Junta has made new friends.
She genuinely loves me, and I genuinely love her and the children. I have provided, loved, and cared for Junta and our three children. At times, Nip does get a little bit annoyed with her sisters because they are 50% farang and they’re both very pretty. They’re both superstars at school, and everyone wants to be their friends and my, do they know it.
Getting back to Junta we have had our arguments and problems like any relationship, but none over money or infidelity. We have never done the things which have destroyed other farang Thai relationships. Strangely enough, after reading back what I have written, I do not say anything about cultural differences, barriers, obstacles between Thailand and the West. I think it is because I do not see any differences. I see things through the lens of a family man with a partner and children providing a stable, loving environment for my family. I am no different to any man with a family he loves and is loved in return.
I suppose I just wanted to tell you my story, and hopefully you will share it with your viewers. Junta and our children know they are lucky and so do I. Without the tragic passing of my partner back in 1998, my life would not be what it is now. I can truly say that I feel I am the luckiest man alive. I have my health, my family what more could I wish for?
Unfortunately, I’m stuck in the UK, not working, and hoping this quarantine ends soon so I can see my family in person. I’ve missed Songkran, school holidays, and I hope I don’t miss Christmas. So remember this was a year old story, so obviously he has missed Christmas.
Not all stories are negative. Some are like mine which are boring but that is what normal family life usually is, and is normally for me, brings a positive outcome. Who am I to change? Thank you for having the patience to read this long story, and I look forward to your next visit. Regards, Mark.
