The Happy Ending That Wasn’t A Massage

We have traveled extensively in Africa Asia the Middle East as well as Europe. Often we’re assumed to be an old gay couple. This assumption is okay in Europe and can actually get you special treatment but in some countries not so much.

Just before COVID we decided to go to Cambodia and explore Angkor Wat as well as other temples and historic sites. Each morning would consist of our private guide taking us to a different attraction followed by lunch in a non-tourist restaurant with our guide along to read the menu and explain and recommend local cuisine. After lunch we would return to our hotel for an afternoon of spa treatments and in the evening on Pub Street listen to music and drink Anchor beer.

One afternoon our guide recommended a different spa that he said was better value than the hotel spa. We agreed and soon we were in a beautiful reception area picking out a professional massage therapist from a lineup of very attractive professionals.

Now don’t get me wrong I’m no prude. I still like the ladies and I don’t need the little blue pill. And if I were single I’d be in Thailand with you partying every night. But I’m still in love and have never been unfaithful in our marriage. So I said to myself “You can do this it’s just a massage.” My brother was laughing and quoted a line from an Austin Powers movie “Just think of Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold winter’s day.” Well this worked to some extent. I think the therapist was becoming frustrated that I was not responding to her efforts to bring things to a happy ending and finally gave up.

It was a good massage though. My pelvic and inner thigh muscles have never felt so good. As I entered the reception area I saw my brother sitting there grinning like the cat that had just eaten the canary. I asked him if he remembered to tip. He says “I tip for services rendered.” He had this big grin on his face. I said “You had a happy ending didn’t you?” He just smiled and said “I want to come back here tomorrow.”

Story #2 The Beer Goggles Problem A First-Timer’s Tale

I visited Thailand for the first time in the early 2000s with a group of friends. A couple of our experienced friends guided us through the process and advised us if we brought $2000 US dollars in spending money we’d have a good time. If we brought $3K we’d have a great time. If we brought $4K plus we would be gods. Laugh out loud.

We spent several days in Bangkok and the last two days in Pattaya going through the motions go go bars beer bars regular and soapy massage shopping eating and drinking drinking too much for me anyway. Problem was I was having such a good time I was pounding beers at every stop. And by the time I found my hookups well let’s just say on a couple of occasions beer goggles had set in and a few of the girls I brought back to my hotel room were not of the caliber you would expect given the choices.

So the following morning while my buddies were showing off their previous evenings’ ladies during breakfast I had to sneak my dates out of the hotel a couple of times without being seen by the group. I’m glad this was only a couple of occasions and most of my dates were beautiful and always accommodating. I was only able to visit once and regret not going back although I did manage a trip to the Philippines a few years later but that’s another story.

As a side note we found Bangkok to be an amazing city full of international tourists male and female alike enjoying the night scene partying incredible malls and of course the food and also affordable.

Story #3 Dodging the Bullet The Mafia Cousin and the Two Girls

I came to Thailand in 2007 met my future wife and was married to her in 2008. Around 2012 we started having a lot of arguments and at one point I left her. I had met a Thai girl in the village I liked that was visiting a friend. She said she liked me but she had a cousin that really liked me as well and would I consider being with both of them? I agreed and we traveled to Northern Thailand where they lived. I was not sure what their situation was but found out they worked for another cousin who was married to an Australian guy. I was checked into a local hotel with both the girls but brought to the cousin’s house to meet her and her husband. Her husband was a professor at a university and seemed very nice.

What I then found out was that the cousin was a daughter of a retired police captain and she was in charge of the local mafia. People would come to her house constantly dropping off sums of money. When we would go into town and walk into shopping malls you could see people cringing away from the cousin in fright knowing what power she had. The cousin was also very bossy and used to telling everyone what to do. I just did not want to be under her control. Even her cousins and I were getting along very nicely.

Eventually she told me I should go back to Bangkok divorce my wife and come back to marry her and both her cousins. You know in Thai custom though not many do it anymore a man can legally have up to four wives. I told her I would and flew back to Bangkok. My wife and I got back together and I told her the circumstances. I also had to return to the States at this time to handle some business there.

I formed a plan and told my wife what I had planned and left for the States. After a few weeks in the States I had my son send an email to the cousin telling her I had a heart attack and I’d passed away. Then I closed my email account within a week and opened a new one. When I returned to Thailand I was nervous maybe someone who knew the cousin might see me but after a few months I relaxed again. There was no effort from the cousin or the two girls to contact me again.

As we say in America I dodged the bullet again maybe more than in words this time.

Story #4 The Navy Rescue That Was Too Good to Be True A Friend’s Ongoing Scam

A bit of background I go to Thailand quite a bit. I’m 37 so I’m still very much into the backpacking circuit and stay away from the bar scene. My friend is the same age but he basically goes for the bar scene. So I’ve hooked up with him a few times in Thailand for a couple of weeks at a time usually which has given me a glimpse into how the bar scene and women operate in general.

My friend is in okay shape and not bad looking. However he’s never really had a girlfriend in the UK just some one night stands here and there probably because he’s still a bit quiet around girls. However going to Thailand strokes his ego because he basically gets a girl every other night and he claims he hardly ever pays. I have actually witnessed it before in the morning when a girl has been asking him for money because “taxis are expensive” presumably because she didn’t want to say “You owe me money for the aerobics.” So instead he walked her to the bus stop and put her on a baht bus. I’ve also known him to be scammed a few times though so you could say that’s just karma.

Last year there were a group of five of us traveling to Thailand doing the island hopping in the south. It was a mixed group so we weren’t going near any of the girls. My friend who for argument’s sake I’ll call Dave kept getting random friend requests and messages from Thai women. At the time he claimed he didn’t know why but maybe it was because the girls have heard about his great stamina on previous visits to Thailand. Laugh out loud. He’s a bit of a narcissist so he probably would believe this in his head. But I’ve later found out it’s because he joined a Facebook group for Thai women looking for foreign guys but he claims he did it by accident.

So there was one female who kept messaging and straight away it was red flag time. I can’t remember the messages now but I found them quite weird and bizarre. The main context though was he was flying into Bangkok Airport and despite never meeting or speaking on the phone she said she would drive two hours from where she lives (I think it could have been Rayong) to pick him up and then spend the night in a nice resort near Pattaya. I asked the girl in the group whether she finds anything dodgy with this and she didn’t seem too concerned. So I just thought I was being an over concerned friend.

So my friend Dave and this Thai girl ended up spending the next four nights together at which point she told him she loves him. He loves the attention so he thinks she has actually fallen madly in love with him. He was shown off quite a bit that he made a girl fall in love with him so quickly. Maybe she did and I’m just being cynical I thought to myself. I think they spent the next week seeing each other quite a bit before he flew somewhere else to meet me.

This is where it starts getting strange. They would video call each other for around seven hours a day maybe and even more. 90% of the time they wouldn’t speak they just wave sporadically to each other and say the occasional few words. A lot of the time I’d forget they were on live cam to each other and mention her name and all I would hear from his phone is a high pitched voice asking what I’m saying about her. Crazy.

A Move to Pattaya Brings Another Unexpected Turn

I finally left Asia and he went to Pattaya. I think she used to drive there after work most nights to see him. It started doing his head in he said because a lot of the time they would argue because she would be tired from driving back and forth a lot and also working. I have to point out at this stage that he never paid her anything as far as I’m aware.

So finally his money ran out and he flew back to the UK around March time this year. However the video calls only got worse and even when he was working they would still be on the phone to each other all the time. She started getting angry at the weekends because he was out all weekend drinking and spending his money on alcohol. One Sunday it got to the point where she said “You don’t care about me and I’m gonna film myself harming myself so you can see the pain that you’re putting me through.” At this stage they probably had known each other for about five months.

After several anxious hours he finally got a call from his girlfriend’s daughter going crazy on the phone saying her mum had just tried to hurt herself and she was blaming it all on my friend. So this is where in my opinion it gets quite unbelievable.

The story that his girlfriend concocted was that she went into the sea to drown herself but she claims that at the time a Thai princess was visiting her town and being escorted by the Thai Navy. The Navy saw her drowning so a couple of the crew dived in to save her life. I find this story very hard to believe as do all our friends. My friend Dave is the only one who seems to believe this story and commented on how lucky it was that the Navy were there to save her life.

So two days later his girlfriend is no longer depressed about it all because my friend has now said he can see how much they mean to each other and promises to change his ways and always be there for her.

So now his girlfriend who apparently also works in real estate despite also having an office job and also once worked with the FBI in Thailand (can you see why I’m finding her hard to believe?) now she wants to set up a business with my friend Dave. She is going to rent out properties in Pattaya and then sublet them to tourists. Surprise surprise my friend has to put up all the cash up front for this business. I’m not sure how much it was but I know his dad lent him money. His dad lives in Pattaya and has been around the bar scene for years so if this is a scam I would have thought he would know which is why I’m still uncertain.

Subletting Rooms Creates a New Financial Problem

Anyway all the money they make from subletting the apartments is going into a separate account in his girlfriend’s name. When we’ve questioned where the evidence that money is going into this account is he said he doesn’t want to ask her because then she’ll think he doesn’t trust her. Business is slow however because it’s rainy season. So basically he’s just paying monthly installments on these apartments with nobody staying in them.

About two months after he originally got back from Thailand and about a month into their business venture she video called him once again saying she was going to hurt herself if he didn’t come out to Thailand to see her. She was running around the apartment head butting walls and had a knife in her hand saying she was going to harm herself. So my friend who works in construction left the job immediately letting people down in the process borrowed money from his dad plus other people to fly out and stay with her.

She’s now quit her office job and has no money so he’s now paying her rent the monthly payments on the apartments they want to rent out and I assume paying for everything else. He stayed out for three weeks where she was no longer depressed any longer and he once again promised her not to go out drinking anymore because it’s selfish and he will be more supportive.

Whenever I see him now which is about once every two weeks he’s always very distracted on his phone. They still video chat relentlessly. The few occasions where I’ve glanced over to his messages if they’re ever messaging each other it’s just arguments and drama. We’ve tried to speak to him about her saying it’s going to end in disaster. She’s either A just after money or B a psycho who will end up harming him or both of them.

So that’s where we are right now. I went out drinking with him yesterday and it was the same whole scenario he’s just on his phone all day and they are breaking up or having massive dramas.

Story #5 Two Thai Women in Sweden Red Flags Manipulation and a Baby Trap

There are two women that live here in Sweden. The first one was younger and has lived here for six or seven years but still cannot speak Swedish at all but she does speak very good English. And they’re both Thai so we were able to communicate pretty good with almost no misunderstandings. We met on the dating app Badoo. I fell for her very fast small body and cute face. At first she would show me a lot of affection and attention at least more than most other Swedish women do. It all looked good on paper.

But now for the bad parts. She had a very bad attitude and was always talking about money all the time. It was always what she needed and what I had to do to help her I had to drive her to this place or that place or to buy her food or anything else she wanted. She almost never showed me any love and she never kissed or hugged me. Did I mention she had a couple of kids as well? Later on she never thought about anything or anybody only her own needs. Even her children were second best. She had been married and she was always talking about how bad her ex husband was and she needed money to go back to Thailand.

I tried to sit on the fence I didn’t really want to get into that argument. But when I did that she said I was a bad man with no feelings towards her. She was very manipulative and always got her own way. She’d look into my eyes with her old puppy dog eyes and I always felt sorry for her and she managed to get her own way. Then the tables would turn and it would be “You’re a good man with a big heart” as long as she got what she wanted. I was almost like an obedient servant. I couldn’t see it back then but I certainly look back and see it now.

The other thing I didn’t like is when we were out and I was with my friends she would keep saying I was crazy maybe 10 or 12 times within a 30 minute period. It drove me mad. I don’t know if her intention was to drive my friends away from me or to turn the attention they were giving me to her.

Dating App Red Flags and the Fear of a Baby Trap

Like a lot of typical Thai women she would always accuse me of seeing other women behind her back when in actual fact she was the only woman I was seeing at the time. Thankfully this relationship only lasted for about a month but there was a scary ending.

On one of the final days before we both knew we were going to part we made love without any protection. At the critical point when I was done she held me firmly with her legs and wouldn’t let me go. I think we all know where this was going. Total panic setting on my side. But a few days later I ended it once and for all. I never heard from her again.

I met a second Thai lady on the dating app Badoo but at the time she was still married to an elderly Swedish guy that had moved out of another and she’d moved out to another guy’s apartment. She said she did not want to have aerobics with him she only cooked and cleaned for him and she still loved him. But when she didn’t get any aerobics she came to me. And I had lots. Nothing more about this girl to tell you. It’s just strange how a lot of them don’t seem to have any feelings of loyalty or guilt. It seems like many of these girls have three guys the first for security who looks after them the second a boyfriend who they can go to for aerobics and a third just as a backup.

I’m currently single and I’m planning my first trip to Thailand in January. I have been in contact with many beautiful women on Badoo who are in Thailand but I have made it quite clear that I won’t be sending any money. About 90% of them dropped off the radar once I told them this. The few that are still talking to me I hope they are not planning the long game and are genuine girls looking for love. Only time will tell. I really hope to meet a good genuine Thai girl who I could possibly have a long term relationship with or even marry and take back to Sweden. I’d love to have children and a real family.