Married Man Wanting A Thai Girlfriend

I just took my first unplanned trip to Thailand and ended up in Pattaya.

I want to be honest, although the trip was unplanned, wanting to meet a Thai girl was something I had in mind.

Back in my country, I am married and have been for many years, so I did not want anything too serious in Thailand, but having a girlfriend did peak my interest.

I did a bar hop down the famous Soi 6 that has thousands of girls, but for some reason I was just not attracted to them too much.

I wasn’t too impressed by the girls with tattoos, even though they were beautiful.

And to be honest, a lot of the girls were not attracted to me either, in fact, in one of the bars on Soi 6 none of the girls even came to sit with me.

Searching The Pattaya Nightlife

After Soi 6, I went to Soi Buakhao and LK Metro.

I did get friendly with one of the girls at a bar on LK metro, sat and had a few drinks with her.

Things were going good until I went to play pool and by the time I came back, she was with a different customer.

He probably had more money that me, and we all know money is more important than looks in that city.

This actually went on for a couple of weeks, id find some bargirls to talk to but for some reason none of them did anything for me.

Then, I tried an online dating app and matched with a 22-year-old college student.

Searching For A Thai Girl While Already Married To A Western Woman

On my profile, I didn’t clearly state that I was married, but I hinted at it.

I did not want to be a straight up creep and say something like “Married man looking for a girlfriend” but at the same time I did not want to lie.

This girl I matched with seemed really nice, didn’t have any tattoos, and was just starting her freelance career.

She seemed a bit awkward and nerdy, but I found that cute.

At first, we messaged each other and then had a video chat.

She was just as cute on video as she were in her profile pics, by far the best looking girl I have seen on my trip.

We joked around a bit, and she mentioned that maybe we could meet the next time I was in Thailand since this was my last night.

I really wanted to see her, hoping it would give me something to look forward to and help us connect.

I thought we could just meet up—no pressure, just talk.

But I also wanted my last night in Thailand to be fun, so I was feeling conflicted.

She encouraged me to go to Walking Street and find what I was looking for.

I told her that I was not interested in meeting anyone and and that she was what I was looking for.

So we made a deal: I would go out and look for a someone who didn’t smoke and had no tattoos.

But if I couldn’t find anyone, I would invite her to my hotel and if anything we could just have a night of chatting together getting to know each other.

I offered her 2,500 baht, but she declined.

I raised it to 3,000, then 4,000, and finally 6,000, but she turned it all down, saying it wasn’t about the money.

I went out but couldn’t find anyone that I was really interested in, so I messaged her.

Meeting Thai Girls From Online

Finally after a little bit of persuading and showing her that I really wanted to see her, she agreed to come to me at 3 a.m.

She kept asking if I was sure and if I was drunk, but I wasn’t drunk at all—I had only had one drink.

I actually liked that she was being cautious and did not just meet every random guy that approaches her on dating apps.

She was worried about the driver of the Grab taxi and wasn’t sure how to get to my hotel.

I offered to meet her when the taxi arrived because she didn’t feel safe coming into the hotel building alone.

Though, I think she was just embarrassed rather than feeling unsafe, I think she thought that the hotel staff would be judging her.

When she got to the hotel, I could tell she had never done the whole ID thing at the front desk before.

She seemed a bit taken back when they asked her for ID.

This Thai Girl Is New To Freelancing

She was dressed like a conservative village girl but was really cute.

Lets just say our night turned out the be very amazing and super fun.

At first, she wasn’t planning on doing anything, but after we talked for an hour and had some fun, things naturally happened.

I finally understand a lot of the stories now when people say it’s easier said than done to not fall for a bargirl or freelancer.

I was totally hooked on her after the first night, and she seemed into it too.

She spent the night and said she had to leave early the next morning, but she ended up staying until 2 p.m. and even went to lunch with me.

She was very sweet and innocent looking but clearly had a wild side to her as well.

I insisted on giving her about 4,000 baht, even though she tried to refuse it, she never actually asked me for any money.

Her English wasn’t perfect, but it was definitely better than any other girl I had met, we could actually communicate with each other.

The day after our first night together, my flight back home was actually that night.

Extending Thai Visa To Stay With A Beautiful Thai Woman

I eagerly offered to take her on a trip to Krabi with me for a few days, and extend my stay in Thailand.

I thought with how cautious she was the night before that she maybe would not like to go on a trip with me.

But it was opposite to that, she was happy that I asked her and accepted going on the trip straight away.

I bought one-way tickets for my new Thai girlfriend because I wasn’t sure if our trip would last two nights or longer.

Since I had never done anything like this before, I kept extending it, and she seemed fine with it too.

It felt like neither of us wanted the trip to end.

We had so much fun that we stayed in Krabi way longer than I expected and I stayed in Thailand all the way up until my tourist visa ran out.

It was the most amazing time of my life with her—her voice, the way she would speak to me in English and then switch to her Isan words, her caring nature, her nurturing personality, and of course, her incredible body! She really wore me out.

I ended up giving her most of my cash and let her handle the payments for everything.

I handed her 20,000 baht, and at the end of the trip, she gave it all back to me, and everything was accounted for.

Honestly, if she had taken some for herself, I wouldn’t have minded, but she didn’t.

She seemed amazed that I trusted her so much with all the money.

Falling In Love With A Holiday Girlfriend

On the third-to-last day, I was so in love with her that I told her:

“I want to give you some baht as a gift for joining me on this trip, but I don’t want it to feel like I’m giving it to you in exchange for anything.”

“It’s yours, and for the rest of the trip, if you don’t want to do anything with me, that’s perfectly fine.”

I explained the idea of the accident of birth, saying that I was only in a fortunate position to earn this money because I happened to be born in the U.S. I told her our roles could have easily been reversed.

I truly felt and believed it. I’m not wealthy in the U.S., but by Thai standards, I suppose I am.

I thought about what was fair for the most amazing week of my life, where this girl did everything I asked of her.

I bought her a handful of items—a small suitcase, a bikini, a few clothes, and two pairs of shoes—and I gave her 30,000 baht in cash (about $1,000).

I really felt like I wanted to give her so much more.

In fact, she really tried to convince me not to buy things because they were too expensive, but I insisted.

I told her that the amount of baht I planned to give her at the end of the trip had nothing to do with what I was spending on gifts or trip expenses in general.

I discounted the trip costs because the hotel would have been the same if I had gone alone, and the flights were cheap enough.

Overall, it was far less than what I would have spent on a girl in the U.S.

I could have easily given her 100,000 baht and even considered it, but I convinced myself to stick with 30,000 and see how she reacted.

She was elated but clearly felt very uncomfortable accepting it.

If she had indicated that she was expecting 100,000 baht, I would have eagerly handed it over, but she didn’t.

The cash was all hers now, and over the last two days, she remained just as affectionate and passionate.

Things were going so good and fast for us that we even started using the word “love.”

Giving Hints That I Want My Girlfriend To Come To America

On the last day, I gave her another 6,000 baht for a possible U.S. visa in the future and for a Thai passport.

A visa is not something we had discussed but I had planted the seed about it, and the money was there if we ever crossed that bridge

I truly felt like I would see her again and again and this would turn into something long term.

I’ve always had girls on the side throughout many of my relationships, keeping my feelings tidy and being very discreet.

All the girls were happy and well taken care of.

I was determined to make this girl a long-term situation.

I believe it’s possible to be in love with more than one woman at a time, I know not everyone thinks like this and that fine, but that is what I believe.

She tried to give the extra cash back to me.

She said that if we were going to see each other again, then and only then would she accept it, but not now.

She seemed insecure, worried that I wouldn’t want to see her again once I had time to think about it.

She didn’t feel attractive compared to other Thai girls.

She returned the cash to me, but I secretly put it back in her handbag before we parted ways.

After we were apart, we sent photos back and forth.

In one of the photos, I forgot to take off my wedding ring, and she saw it.

I didn’t think much of it; I assumed she knew I was married and that it was normal for married Americans to have Thai girlfriends.

Convincing My Thai Girl To Stay With Me As A Married Man

As I said, I did not directly say on my dating profile that I am a married man, but I hinted at it and was obvious in doing so.

A few days after I returned to the U.S., she confronted me on one of the many video chats that we would have.

She asked about my marriage, and I didn’t deny it, thinking she was already aware, So I said yes I am married.

She teared up and was clearly upset and emotional, telling me how much she liked me and how I could lie to her like this.

I replied that I thought she already knew and took the hint from my profile, I told her my feelings were genuine towards her and I meant everything I said.

She insisted that she didn’t know, although she accepted some blame too because she didn’t ask.

She felt like a stupid girl for spending time and falling in love with a married man.

She said that because of her Buddhist beliefs, she couldn’t see me, she wanted to be respectful to other women in my life.

She kept saying that she knew she had done some things that weren’t very Buddhist and that she wasn’t a perfectly good girl, but being with a married man was one thing she wouldn’t do.

How Can I Make This Girl My Girlfriend and Keep My Wife

I was surprised because she had claimed to be a freelancer when I met her.

I think I met her during her first week of trying to be a freelancer, but only online, not out and about.

She closed all her accounts and wasn’t interested in meeting anyone else after she had met me.

So, my question to the community is:

How should I explain to this to a young Thai woman, who seems perfect for me and is tattoo-free, that having an affair with a married guy is acceptable considering my marriage situation?

She keeps saying that she can’t do that to another girl, that it’s not right, and that it’s not the Buddhist way.

When we were in Krabi, we became very close in a short time, it wasn’t awkward us being together and it felt so natural..

She said she felt closer to me than to people she had known for many years, and said she did not even feel like this with her previous boyfriend that she had been with for over a year.

My Time With Her

She took me to a temple, and we prayed together.

Im not really a Thailand expert, but I don’t think a girl takes a guy to pray at the temple if she doesn’t really like him, right?

One of the points I’m trying to make to her is that not all marriages in the U.S. are the same.

Sometimes people get married for convenience, like in “green card” marriages, where an American guy marries a non-U.S. citizen girl so she can become a U.S. citizen and stay here permanently.

My marriage is not full of love and commitment, I guess it could be classed as an “open marriage” and me and my wife both know that.

Not all marriages follow the traditional story of a boy meeting a girl and falling in love.

I’ve already bought my return ticket to Thailand to see this girl again later this year.

We’ll meet in her hometown just to talk.

I don’t plan to take her on vacation or spoil her or anything like that, I just want to talk with her, get to know her better and try to explain to her the future that we could have.

I know that most girls would think twice about being with a married man so I do understand where she is coming from, hopefully I can explain my situation better to her.

She has told me several times in emails that she never wants to see me again and wants to cut contact, but every time I email her, she eventually replies, saying she can’t resist responding.

She clearly has feelings for me and has also told me that she does, she’s just telling herself its better for her to walk away from this.

How can a devout Buddhist girl who was willing to try freelancing now decide that she cannot be in a relationship with a married guy?

Having said that, most of the girls that work in the bars and freelancing claim to be buddhist, so I guess its normal and acceptable now days.

I Should Move On… But I Cant

I understand her point of view; she was fine with it being a one-time thing, but now that it could become something more, being the other woman is a line she doesn’t want to cross.

But this married guy is in a green card marriage—not a marriage based on love.

Why doesn’t she grasp that? Is there couples counseling in Thailand?

If nothing else, I would at least like to be in her life for a few years as her boyfriend.

Then, down the road, once she meets someone good for her long-term, I’ll let her go out of love.

During this time, I can help her avoid returning to the freelancing world and protect her from the scars it could leave.

I know a lot of the comments will be that I am being selfish and I shouldn’t be doing what I am doing, but I can’t help it.

She would make the perfect girlfriend.

I truly believe that when she’s older, she will be exactly what some nice guy is looking for, if the nightlife world of Thailand does not corrupt her too much.

By then, her English will be near perfect, and she’ll be a more mature and wise woman, having avoided a string of relationships that could put her at risk.

I desperately want to give her a nurturing and caring relationship, even if it’s from afar.

And if my marriage doesn’t work out, then she will be The One.

Well that’s my little story I wanted to share, pretty unique from the rest on her I guess, so feel free to read it for your viewers.