The Lies That Thai Bar Girls Tell You

Thailand has some of the best night life out there, and places such as Bangkok and Pattaya are known all around the world.

But stepping into a bar in Thailand, you need to be aware of the tricks that some of these ladies will pull on you

This guide submission is mainly aimed at people that will be coming to experience the night life in Thailand for the first time.

However if you have been here before, or have been here for a long time, then there maybe some new ones on the list that you haven’t heard yet.

Feel free to comment some of the lies and tricks that you have heard and add them to this list.

I will start with some of the common lines you hear in the bar, and then move onto some of the lines you will hear if you get friendly with one and decide to take things out of the bar, or even keeping in contact with them once you go home.

Lets start with the main one, the lie that every single bar girl says at some point

Table of Contents

1. “I am new to the bar or I have only been here 2 weeks”

I remember my first trip to Thailand, and every single girl I would speak to would just so happen to be new at the bar.

If it’s your first time here, you might think you are very lucky to have met a girl that is new to the scene and not been around the block a few times.

They say this to pull on your heart strings and spoil them a little by buying them ladydrinks and hope for a big fat tip at the end.

It’s very easy to fall for this if you are new to the scene, she could tell you she has just came from her village and started working today, only to make some extra money.

It’s a lie that can actually be quite believable, but then you go to the next bar you hear the same thing, and then by the end of the night you’ve heard that line like 10 times, you realize its a common lie.

Truth is, they have been there months and months, maybe even years.

Still to this day, you will hear this line being said, its as old as time.

If your new girl doesn’t say this line to you, she will say that her friend is new to the bar and hasnt had a ladydrink or barfine before, again this is just a lie to get you to spend.

Its eve more funnier when they say they have started working today, yet everyone seems to know her.

2 “I don’t have a boyfriend.”

She probably does have a boyfriend, and he’s probably Thai.

And yes, he will know what she is doing, he will not care as long as she is bringing home money for the night.

They tell you that they are single to make you feel like you have a real chance with her and she’s hoping you will catch feelings for her.

Catching feelings for a bargirl equals more money for them, so they will try their best to convince you that she isn’t taken.

She may also have a foreign boyfriend that is not in Thailand, but there is a slim chance that she will tell you that either.

She for sure is not going to want you knowing about her other foreigns boyfriends that are sending her money each month.

So when she swears she’s single, take it with a grain of salt—or a whole spoonful.

3 “I don’t have any sponsors.”

If she is attractive and works in a bar that is in a popular area, I can almost guarantee that she will have a sponsor or a handful of sponsors.

This will also be said to you if you have already gone back to your country and kept intouch with her, or started a relationship with her.

If you are already at the stage where you are sponsoring her, she will be telling you that you’re the only one sending her money.

But do you think you’re the only guy who fell for her sweet messages and cute selfies?

Many bar girls have multiple guys supporting them at the same time.

One pays for rent, one covers shopping, another sends cash “for family” the list goes on.

It’s like a foreigner subscription service, and you just signed up for the premium package.

She will be keeping in contact with these once they go home, telling them that they are the only one, and stupidly a lot of these guys believe it.

4 “Its my birthday today”

If it’s your first time in Pattaya and you are walking around checking out the bars, you will notice that a lot of the bars have balloons outside and maybe even live music outside at the entrance.

This means that it’s apparently someone’s birthday inside the bar.

The girl whose birthday it is will be wearing something around her neck like a big string necklace that customers will staple money to.

They can make some serious money from this and end up walking away with thousands of baht for the night.

Although a lot of the times, its actually true that its the persons birthday, but sometimes they are lying just to get money.

If you go into a bar and a girl comes up to you telling you it’s her birthday, think twice about beliving her on that one.

A couple of years ago, I had a local bar that I would go to every night before I went out into the city.

There was a girl in there that had about 3 birthdays in a few months, I found it amusing but its easy for 2 week tourists to believe them.

Reply with something like “You said that last month when I came here” and see the reaction on her face

5. “You are the first foreigner I ever liked.” (Highly unlikely.)

If she says this to you, you should congratulate yourself and buy her a lady drink because it’s 100% true, she has finally fell for her first ever foreigner.

That is sarcasm by the way, she said the same thing to someone that was in the bar an hour before you got there.

The truth is, she’s probably said the same thing to thousands of other guys.

It makes you feel special, and when a guy feels special, he’s more likely to spend money.

Simple psychology, my friend.

Like every other comment you hear from these ladies, take it with a pinch of salt.

6 “I Have Never Gone With A Customer Before”

This is another cracking lie about not going with customers before.

She wants you to see her as a respectable woman that is just working in the bar to get drinks and then once her shift is over she goes back home alone.

If you end up believing this lie and spend the rest of your holiday with her, you are going to feel like a million dollars.

You are the only customer she has ever been with, you must be really handsome right? Really special? She must really like you..

You can’t let this one slip away.

A bit of common sense would tell you that this is clearly a lie, but you would be surprised at how many people fall for this.

7. “I don’t like working in the bar, I want a real love.”

If this is true, then why is she still working there?

Sure, some bar girls do want to leave that life behind, but if she really wanted out, she’d already have found a different job.

A lot of them stay because the money is too good and the lifestyle is too easy.

“Wanting love” sounds great, but when it comes down to it, the financial security of the bar often wins.

Bar girls know that a lot of men that are going to Thailand are single, broken, down and surprisingly looking for love.

If she can convince you that she is also looking for the same, then there is more of a chance that she is going to be able to reel you in for the long run.

She has probably had many chances of real love from foreigners that have fell in love with her, but she has blew her chances with them one way or another.

Either being too demanding for money, playing games, or just straight up being caught out having more boyfriends, so the guy has left her.

So given the circumstances, It’s true, a lot probably don’t like working in the bar, and I can’t blame them, but if they want to leave, they can.

It’s not hard for them to find a boyfriend in Thailand, and start a real relationship if they really want to.

The next lie happens when you get chatting to a bargirl and then tell her you’ll come see her again tomorrow or another day, then once you return to the bar she is nowhere to be seen, you’ll ask the other girls and staff where she is and they will reply something like:

“Oh she is sick today” or “she has gone to see her family for the day” But really has been barfined.

These girls cover for each other, if they know that you are her customer, they are not going to tell you that she has already been barfined.

They will lie through their teeth to make you think she has a genuine excuse for not being at the bar

Gents, you have to remember that these women are there to make money, if a customer comes in before you and flashes his cash, she is not going to wait for you.

So if you do go to the bar to see her again, on a day you both arranged, and she’s not there, don’t believe the excuses.

But it’s not all doom and gloom, look on the bright side, you are already at the bar now and her friends are there also looking for money.

Take one of them instead.

8. “Can you buy my sister a drink? She never gets any customers”

You’re sat there at the bar or at a table, drinking and talking to your new bargirl friend and having a good time.

All of a sudden her friend randomly walks over to your table and introduces herself to you.

You’re not interested because you are already sat with the one you like, but she tells you that this new girl is her sister.

She feeds you some sob story like she never gets a customer, doesn’t have ladydrinks or is new to the bar and very shy.

This is another straight up lie.

1, that is not her sister, its just her friend trying to get money out of you.

And 2, she does get customers it just so happens at that particular point, she doesn’t have one, so you are the next best option.

This is also a very common lie slash trick that the girls will pull, its similar to the “im new to the bar scene”

So if you are sat with a bargirl that you like and she wants you to buy her so called sister a drink, just say no, your girl isn’t going to go anywhere and turn down commission, unless of course you stop buying her drinks also.

Next trick, “I feel sick, I want to go home”

This is a nightmare when this happens, but it happens to the best of us.

You go out, do a bit of barhopping and you finally find a girl that is 100% your type.

You start talking, drinking, ladydrinks, shots and whatever else, having the time of your life with this stunner.

It comes time to pay the bill after a great night together, you spend over 5,000 baht on the drinks and give her a nice tip because you are feeling the way she made you feel, special.

Problem is, you don’t want the night to end yet, so you ask if you can barfine her and go elsewhere with her whether it be to another bar or back home.

If you are not her type, which you probably aren’t, her only aim was to drain as much money from you as possible while you are inside the bar.

She isn’t interested in leaving with you and she will hit you with “I feel sick” or “I can’t tonight because I need to be up early” or some other lame excuse.

The truth is, she never had any intention of going with you, once you paid the bill in the bar that was game over for her.

Of course, there is no rule that these girls have to be barfined or leave with a customer, its strictly up to them, but it would be nice of them to tell you that at the start of the night before you spend all your money on them.

9. “I only work in the bar to support my family.”

This is actually true, well, that’s the reason they started working at the bar.

But once they get into that lifestyle and see the fast money, party nights, meeting new foreigners that spoil them and for once in their life having money in their bank, then it becomes more than just supporting their family.

Of course they still send money back to their family, but only the bare minimum, the rest of the money is going to be spend on themselves.

Nothing wrong with spoiling yourself with your hard (or shall I say easy) earnt money, but don’t think of these girls as noble if they tell you they are only doing this to help their family.

If it was just about supporting their families, they’d probably choose a different job.

And if they are actually doing this to send money home to their family, guess who’s going to be supporting her family in the future if you 2 start something? Yes, you.

10. “I have never been bar fined before.”

Again, this is a lie they say to try and make you look at them as different to all the other girls.

She wants you to think that she is a saint and has never been outside the bar with a customer before.

You might think you have hit the jackpot by meeting a first timer, but in reality, she’s probably had 2 barfines before you even got to the bar that night.

A simple and obvious lie, yet it works so many times.

11. “I Don’t Like Thai Men”

I really don’t understand why Thai girls say this one.

As I mentioned earlier, most of these girls already have Thai boyfriends, yet they want to convince you that they are only into western men.

If you are sat in a bar facing outside and can see the entrance, just look at how many of these girls get dropped off at the bar by their Thai boyfriends.

I think that girls tell you they don’t like Thai men, just to make you feel extra special, who knows, but its a line that gets said a lot for some reason.

12. “I am not like other bar girls.”

Every guy wants to believe that there girl is different, its been said by a million men before and it will be said by another million men this year that think their girl is different.

She is not, she’s exactly the same as the other girls.

Just go there for a good time, don’t get feelings and you will be fine.

Your girl is not different from the rest.

13. “I like older guys, not young men”

The chances are, you will be a lot older than the girls inside the bar.

There is nothing wrong with that, it’s just, for example if you look at Pattaya, the customer are more of older men than younger guys.

So to make you feel good about yourself, the girl will say she likes older men and not younger guys.

In some cases, this will be true, she might prefer more relaxed nights with an older man rather than a party wild night with a younger guy.

I don’t forget, older men seem to have more money than younger men, there is always that.

14. “He’s only my friend”

Let’s say you meet a girl in a bar, you get friendly and you keep going back to see her, even take her out on dates.

But every now and again when youre out with your new girl she keeps bumping into this one guy that says hello to her.

She looks a bit nervous and shy every time she sees him, and he starts showing up to the bar more often.

She will tell you that he is just a friend or that he’s one of her friends boyfriend.

The truth is, it’s probably one of her customers that is waiting for her to be free so he can take her.

When they say that a guy is just a friend, more often than not they are lying.

15. “Hes My Brother”

This one is similar to the previous lie about his only my friend, but this time the guy is Thai and it’s her brother.

You may see him occasionally come and talk to her outside the bar, drop her off for work, texting her, video calling her, and she will claim it’s her brother.

Some men who have gotten in relationships with bar girls have even gone to meet the family in the village to find out her “brother” is there also.

Later on down the line, he discovers it’s not actually her brother, it’s her Thai boyfriend or husband.

He will be well aware of what she is doing because the money you are giving your girl will be going to him as well.

Don’t end up paying for them both, its not her brother, its her boyfriend.

16. “I want to go to school”

Here is another lie that is made to try and manipulate you in thinking she is a good girl and wants to better herself

Her going to school would be a good thing but the cost of it would be coming out of your pocket.

The amount of guys that give these girls money for school, or to start their own business or just for a better future is insane.

If you give a girl money for her future, you will never see it again and you probably will never see her again either.

Don’t let these girls manipulate you, they are good at their job.

Now, that is some of the common lines you will hear from the bar girls while you are inside the bar talking to them.

But what happens if you get friendly with them and decide to take them out the bar? What if things go well and you keep in contact once you leave? What if you end up in some type of long distance relationship with a girl you’ve met?

Well here are some more common lines you will hear from them from afar.

17. “I Will never ask you for money.”

This one is great and I used to love hearing this from a bargirl that I would end up chatting with.

Lets say you get friendly with one of the girls you meet on your holiday, she wants you to think she is different by not asking for money.

She will tell you straight that she likes you and does not care about your money.

However she will mention all her problems to you over and over again, her rent is due, her mom is sick, or her dog needs surgery, and you know what solves 99% of these problems? That’s right, money.

Technically, she’s not “asking“—she’s just letting you know about her problems, expecting you to offer support.

It’s a clever way to get you to pull out your wallet without directly demanding it.

It’s easy to give in and offer help if she’s not directly asking for it and you genuinely like her.

Stay strong, don’t give in.

18. “My family is very poor and my mother is sick”

I admit, Some families do struggle, and sending money back home is common in Thai culture.

But “poor” can mean different things.

In some cases, the family owns land, a house, and a pickup truck—but they still say they have no money.

If you get into some type of relationship with these girls and end up spending some time with them, maybe going on dates or having a holiday girlfriend fling, you will probably hear something a long the lines of “my mother is sick and needs help with money”

Don’t fall for it, her mother is probably right as a rain and in perfectly good health.

In fact, her family probably own land and businesses.

Just don’t fall for this one, unless you actually end up traveling to see her family, then you can decide.

19. “I just need a little help this month.”

This line normally comes after you have finished your holiday and headed back home, still keeping intouch with the bargirl that you fell in love with.

Maybe you are texting and video calling every day, falling for her more and more, things are going good and you’re counting down the days until you are back with her.

Then one month, she hasn’t earnt enough money to send back home, or pay her rent, or bills or whatever other excuse she comes up with.

The moment you help her with some money that month, Suddenly, there’s a new problem every few weeks—a broken phone, school fees, a sick aunt.

If you’re not careful, you’ll find yourself trapped in a long-term personal ATM commitment you never signed up for.

Do NOT fall for the lie that she needs a little help.

20. “I lost my phone and need money for a new one.”

That’s the 3rd phone she has lost this month.

For some reason, bar girls are always losing their phones.

Maybe they have the worst luck in the world, or maybe they just want the latest iPhone.

These girls normally always say something about their phone to their new farang once he has gone back to his country.

And they do it quite well, such as “Baby, my phone is breaking and I won’t be able to talk to you anymore or send you pictures, can you help me buy a new one?”

Now if the farang is loved up with her, he’s going to want to see his bar girl beauty on video call, but how can he do that if she doesn’t have a phone?

He’s going to be a sucker and buy her a new one, that way, they can carry on their relationship that is probably going to end in the gutter anyways.

Either way, if you send her cash for a new phone, don’t be surprised if she “loses” it again in a few months.

21. “I will stop working in the bar for you.”

This one usually comes after a few months of dating when she senses you’re getting serious.

She quite possibly would leave the bar for you… If you took out your wallet and agreed to sponsor her with the salary that she would be losing.

Are you really willing to pay her out of the bar and actually trust her that she will actually leave?

You would pay and she will probably tell you some nights that she is going to bed but instead goes straight back to the bar to make extra money.

So yes she might leave the bar… for the time being.

But if things don’t work out, or if she realizes life without easy bar money is hard, she’ll be right back in her old spot, flashing that same sweet smile at the next guy.

22. “I am waiting for you, I am not with any other men.”

Yes, She’s patiently waiting for your return to Thailand, she’s just sitting at home, watching TV and knitting a new sweater.

Don’t be so naive guys, if you are not there, and you haven’t paid her out the bar, of course she is going to be meeting other men.

The first part about her waiting for you, that might be true.

But the second part of “I am not with any other men” you’d be a fool to believe that.

And if you know that she is going to be still working at the bar while you are away, then this next lie is for you also.

23. “I don’t go with customers, I just work here for drinks.”

Some bar girls do just serve drinks, but if she’s working in a place known for bar fines, chances are she’s gone with customers before.

Maybe not every night and maybe not with every guy—but the option is always there.

If a bar girl tells you she never goes with men, she’s probably trying to convince you that she’s “different.”

Spoiler alert: she’s not.

They will also say the line “I am a cashier at the bar, not a bargirl” which means that she works behind the bar and does not go with customers.

Again, this is a straight up lie and she has probably never been a cashier before.

Some girls like to act like they’ve retired from bar fines, but when the right offer comes along, suddenly they have “one last time” left in them.

Ok, that is some of the lies and tricks I can think of off the top of my head, there are many many more and hopefully some of you Thailand veterans can comment them.

A couple few more than I can think of but won’t write much about are

“I will come to visit you in your country.”
“I just want a simple life in the village.”
“I will change for you.”
“If you don’t send me money, I wont be able to eat”
“My heart is broken because of my last boyfriend.”

Another famous one that is more of a joke now is