Dating Thai Bar Girls and Thai Women Online
Story 1 A Martial Artist Shares His Thailand Dating Perspective
Occasionally I listen to various YouTube videos but I have yet to find anything that resonates with my experiences I’ve never felt sorry for men who get swindled because they lead with their money or emotions.
This is my story I am 56 years old black man in top shape due to my martial arts training which I began at age 11 and have continued ever since I’ve never smoked and I rarely drink maybe once a year for a special event and often I don’t drink at all I have no problems performing with women and can perform like a 29 year old without any pills to help.
My parents now deceased traveled overseas for educational and speaking engagements as far back as 1955 mostly to the Middle Eastern European countries I also have other family members who have lived overseas for years including a cousin who’s played pro basketball in Japan for 28 years I started traveling overseas at the age of 12 in 1980 due to my martial arts training and continued to travel for it until my mid 20s spending summers in China Japan and South Korea.
After that I began traveling to Singapore the Philippines, Thailand Malaysia and Indonesia with the majority of my time over the last 30 years spent in the Philippines and Thailand the men in my family mostly date or marry women from these countries.
A key difference for me is that I initially came to Asia for martial arts so I was surrounded by astute men and women I can’t completely relate to what many YouTubers talk about regarding the bar scene as my social networking is different.
As a doctor in clinical mental health and forensics it’s hard to scam me my work with criminals whether in prisons on the streets or with other populations trying to con people has built my resilience while nothing is impossible a woman would have to be exceptional to take advantage of me additionally I have consulted and worked with universities overseas military law enforcement and hospitals for mental health purposes I never understood why Western men don’t make connections with the astute men and women of these countries as these as these men would never pay ladies for bar or massage girls not to judge those girls but I would never pay Dar or let them tell me they’re the prize when I know I’m the prize I’m married to a pure Filipino who has degrees teaching licenses and businesses the women I dated from other Asian countries came from high ranking families as for three or four girls or bars and massage girls though some are genuinely nice I can’t go beyond a superficial fun time with them I’ve been able to live overseas for the last 25 years thanks to my work in academics which I’ve been doing online for 30 years and my private practice which I moved online in 2008 I currently live in the Philippines still train in martial arts and visit Thailand twice a year for about 2 months I have friends and fraternity brothers who own bars in Thailand and basically that’s it.
Story 2 A Singapore Romance Leads to Bangkok Doubts
Met a lady named Joan at a famous tourist spot in Singapore when I saw this beautiful woman I approached her while she was with a friend there was nothing remarkable about our conversation but I managed to get her phone number over the following months we stayed in touch and gradually grew interested in each other.
Joan worked in PR at a big Thai firm and came from an affluent family one day she told me she had booked a trip to Singapore for June 2023 and I was excited to meet her in person on the day of her arrival I hadn’t planned an itinerary as the past few months had been crazy mainly due to issues with my ex wife.
Nonetheless when I saw Joan at her hotel I was ecstatic we did a few typical tourist activities in Singapore and even visited a temple to pray it was a great time including our intimate moments.
After she returned to Thailand I bought a ticket to visit her in Bangkok in October 2023 when we met in Bangkok it was a continuation of our time in Singapore we explored the usual sites in the city and even visited AA however due to her.
Medical condition there wasn’t any bedroom fun this time around over the following months I found myself wanting to visit Bangkok alone to meet other women so I didn’t inform Joan I had to come up with excuses each time to avoid video calls with her we had originally planned to.
Visit Pattaya together in January 2024 but after much thought I decided to end things with her in December 2023 I wanted to regain my freedom months later I realized Joan was a rare gem but we all live and die by the choices we make in 2019 I started learning how to.
Story 3 Meeting Women in Singapore and Chiang Rai
Approach women on the streets that October I met a girl from Chiang Rai at a famous spot in Singapore during our conversation I discovered she was going back to Thailand the next day so I assumed I wouldn’t have a chance with her.
But then an idea came to mind I suggested buying her a one way ticket back to Bangkok and she agreed we spent Friday night together had drinks and ended up at a short-time hotel before we could meet again COVID.
She started asking me to buy land in her Village and build her a house but I ignored those requests after a few more attempts to get money.
From me she blocked me online in late 2023 I met a lady with a group of friends at another famous tourist spot in Singapore they said they were meeting a friend who was married to a Singaporean after a few minutes of conversation the five of us agreed to have a glass of beer at a nearby Bistro it was fun with That music and singing.
But the ladies had to fly back to Bangkok the next day so nothing happened after the drinks I later learned the women named April worked as a masseuse in Bangkok though her hometown was Chiang Mai she would travel to Bangkok Whenever there were job opportunities.
In February of 2024 I visited Chiang Mai and April happened to be there at the same time she picked me up at the airport and stayed with me during my vacation I thought I had a good catch one night we went to a bar to watch Manchester United play on the big screens April insisted on staying outside the bar while I stayed inside to watch the game she got upset when I only returned to her after the game was over the next morning I had to leave early to visit April messaged me saying she was angry and lonely and decided to go home though we had amazing bedroom fun I wasn’t going to beg anyone to stay after she left she blocked me online for good.
Story 4 Discovering Pattaya and Finding Ria
I finally visited Pattaya I had traveled to different parts of Thailand before but Pattaya had always eluded me for those who haven’t been Pattaya has its own Vibe very different from the rest of Thailand it’s almost like a world within a world there is a popular saying there is a popular saying that goes good guys go to heaven but bad guys go to Pattaya it’s funny but I think all kinds of people good and bad find themselves there people are shaped by their experiences the company they keep where they find themselves and Pattaya brings all sorts together for my first stay I booked a hotel right on walking Street which is as Central as it gets directly across from my hotel was a nightclub though fortunately it was closed at the time so noise wasn’t an issue fast forward a few years I returned to the same Hotel and that club had reopened let’s just say I wasn’t getting any sleep until at least 6:00 a.m. but that’s a story for.
Another day one night I found myself at the far end of Walking Street at a club called minks it was one of those nights where you go with a flow I met a girl there and though we didn’t exchange many words we danced had a drink and ended up back at my place the next morning she mentioned needing to send money to her family standard story right later that night as I was heading back to mix I spotted her with another guy and he was buying her a hat I turned around and decided to duck into a live music bar instead I text her about the hat and she responded with something about sending money to her family again you know the script usual sort of thing.
Anyway after that I realized I wasn’t interested in that type of relationship I needed to get a better feel for Pattaya which took some time I can’t say I ever felt entirely comfortable but I had 5 weeks to explore after that night at mix I spent the next two days just walking around soaking it all in my favorite part was discovering all the live music playing at the different clubs sometimes i’ just stand outside and listen eventually I found a bar with a great band and it became my regular spot I’d sit on a stool outside watch the band and people watch.
Across from the music bar was another venue some sort of gentleman’s club I think it was called Red Square though I’m not entirely sure the bar I frequented I’ve long since forgotten its name one night I noticed a girl standing outside the red lit Club trying to draw TR customers in she looked like a Wonder Woman with her outfit resembling the iconic costume I mentioned it to the guy running the music bar and we had a good laugh by the fourth or fifth night the staff at the Rock Bar knew me and we chatted about walking Street I used to work with bands back home so I naturally gravitated towards the music scene one night I decided to go over and chat with Wonder Woman her real name was Ria and we struck up a conversation it was early in the evening so there weren’t many customers yet we stepped out to a small table.
Behind the club overlooking the water it was clearly an area meant for employees not customers we talked about everything from a life to two stars to aliens we even saw a shooting star that night it was one of those random deep conversations that stick with you after a while the bar manager came out and called Ria back in she didn’t want to go so I ordered another drink which brought us more time Ria didn’t enjoy working there which I understood she confided in me that she had just started at the club that night I first saw her on the street for the next few nights we’d meet in a hidden pool room in the back of the club it was odd there was no clear affiliation with the bar but no one ever disturbed us we’d spend hours shooting pool and I learned a lot about her Ria had a tough time adjusting to Pattaya and had a rocky relationship with a bar manager who constantly pressured her one night after being forced to dance for customers Ria had a run-in with a guy who got two hands on she threw him back onto the sofa and stormed off that night she refused to see anyone else and sat with me until the bar closed.
Over time Ria and I grew closer though she was still sending money home to her family despite the occasional drama at the club we spent most nights together away from the hustle and bustle of Pattaya I’d like to say a bond was special and in many ways it was Ria was a 10 out of 10 in looks but she also had a fire in her a blend of Village girl innocence and City toughness eventually she got a job at a rooftop top bar called cam cam where she mingled with customers it was a better fit for her but our Dynamic stayed the same we never crossed the line into romance even though we were spending every night together in hindsight maybe I should have pushed for something more but I didn’t I didn’t want to ruin what we had she was a character and I enjoyed being around her no matter what Pattaya threw our way.
Ria and the Life She Built in Pattaya
Around my fourth week in Pattaya I met another girl called lean while Ria was sleeping late laan worked at a goo bar and had been in Pattaya for over a year we started hanging out in the afternoons and although she was stunning an eight pushing nine she never wanted anything serious loan was full and always showed up when I called which is rare in Pattaya we spent time together and while she was different from Ria she became my go-to during the days after my trip I stayed in touch with both women for a while but as time passed we lost Contact 6 years later I found out lean had married a foreigner she messaged me online just before changing our number she reminded me of how I’d once asked her to be my girlfriend to which she laughed back then funny how life changes as for RIA I found out she also got married to one of the guys from her Thai boxing class she now has two kids and though I haven’t reached out I hope she’s living a good life it’s strange how things work out but but I’ll never forget my time with her in Pattaya it was an experience that shaped my whole view of the city and its people.
Story 5 A Thai Marriage Leads to a Custody Battle
I met my ex Nim through a mutual friend back in 2009 from then on I made Regular trips to Thailand to visit her but by 2010 I had to return to the UK for work eventually Nim and I got married and I arranged a settlement visa for her she seemed to adjust well to life in the UK and for a while things appeared to be heading in the right direction Nim was content while I was out working and after some time she became pregnant our son was born at waral Manor hospital and I truly thought I had everything a new family a stable home and a fresh start in the UK Nim had never been much of a drinker or a party goer before she stayed away from the other Thai women in our community and I admired her for that she was sharp with money too at one point she even started a small business selling car trailers which I never would have expected she worked hard and I had no.
Complaints everything seemed to be on the up and up over time she passed all the necessary exams to get her UK citizenship and passport but after that something changed her attitude towards me shifted and it was like a switch had been flipped things went downhill fast I had put so much effort and money into making sure everything worked for both of us but it was like none of that mattered to her anymore she began making all kinds of Demands asking for large sums of money the worst part she started threatening to take my son back to Thailand saying I’d never see him again if I didn’t comply I kept all this bottled up not even telling my family but I wasn’t going to lose my son I started saving everything I could to ensure he stayed with me in the UK Nim became quite manipulative pressing me to transfer money to her That bank account so she could hide it from any potential legal issues here.
Eventually we flew back to Thailand where she demanded land a house and cash all while using our son as leverage things took a darker turn when we moved into our new home she wanted me out but I refused to leave without my son One Night in a blatant Act of intimidation someone smashed the windows of the house twice but I held my ground I wasn’t leaving then came the physical confrontations she became violent I couldn’t bring myself to retaliate I just don’t believe in hitting women but the situation had become unbearable I started sleeping in my pickup truck outside a local 7 Eleven to escape the hostility at home anything was better than returning to her aggression one night I returned to the house to collect my son and it escalated into more verbal and physical abuse all I have ever wanted was to do right by my son.
It was during this time that I met someone new a wonderful woman Emma who worked as a shift leader at Tesco we connected through Facebook and she helped me navigate this nightmare she was a breath of fresh air and amidst the chaos while in Thailand I met an Englishman who encouraged me to go to a family court I hesitated at first thinking it would cost me a fortune but I eventually went to court in nakon sakon that’s where I met Mr Hawkins my savior in this whole ordeal the court officials were amazing and when I asked how much this would cost he said it was free I couldn’t believe it the only thing I paid for was some paperwork about 500 baht in total as I remember maybe a little bit more but as I say I can’t remember.
When the court served Nim with the documents she showed up probably thinking that as a Thai woman and me being a foreigner she had the upper hand but I had prepared well.
I presented evidence from her Facebook showing her drunk and partying which didn’t sit well with the court I also provided proof that she had been out of contact with our son for months something she had outright denied in the end the court granted us 50/50 custody they also ruled that I could take my son to the UK for family visits I know there are other men out there in similar situations and I want them to know it’s possible to fight back just because you’re a foreigner doesn’t mean you’ll lose in a Thai Court I’m living proof of that my son and I are now living with Emma who treats him like her own she’s hard-working doesn’t drink and has been a rock through all of this she never once asked me for anything looking back the abuse from Nim and her family reached its peak back then and although she cleared me out of most of my money I still have my son we flew back to the UK in October 2020 and since then Nim hasn’t made any effort to contact her son which is honestly a relief from what I’ve heard she’s now an alcoholic living with her mother and burning through everything she once had including the house the truck and all the money apparently it’s all gone lost to gambling and alcohol I spent 10 years with Nim and I wouldn’t consider myself a newcomer to Thai culture I even speak decent Thai but none of that could have prepared me for how drastically someone could change it’s like a bad dream how someone you love and Trust can turn your life upside down life is finally settling down my son is thriving in school and he’s fluent in both English and Thai but this whole experience has left me feeling deeply bitter one day my son will ask about his mother and I don’t know how I’ll answer him that’s a conversation I’m dreading so firstly.
Story 6 A New Connection in Pattaya
I grew up in a pretty average family with all the usual hopes and dreams about the future one of those dreams oddly enough was to visit Thailand I remember watching a documentary on the Discovery Channel when I was a teenager it showcased the culture lifestyle and women of Thailand and it stuck with me fast forward to when I was 20 and I found myself in a long term relationship that lasted 6 years after the breakup I jumped right into another one probably to distract myself from the pain of the last that turned out to be a huge mistake my new girlfriend was struggling with severe depression which I didn’t realize at first I tried to help her but between her emotional struggles and my own stress at work it became too much after a heart to heart with her older sister we decided it was best to end things that experience made me reflect on a lot and for the first time I wanted to focus on myself.
Then one night while I was at home having a beer that old documentary about Thailand came to mind on a whim I applied for 10 days off work and booked a flight to Bangkok it was a spur of the moment decision but I figured why not my first trip to Bangkok was a wild ride I blew through my budget faster than I could have imagined and I made all the rookie mistakes I had no idea about the lady boys got scammed by Tuk Tok drivers and was even charged for drinks I never ordered it was chaotic but I didn’t let it get me down I took it all in stride chalking up to a learning experience.
I realized that anyone going to Thailand for the first time is likely to get ripped off and rather than argue I just stayed focused on having a good time once I got back home I knew I wanted to go again but this time I was determined to be better prepared I worked hard for another 6 months saving up for the trip and did a ton of research I was especially excited to visit Pattaya with which I had heard a lot about for this second trip I made sure to book a flight that landed during the day instead of late at night like last time when I landed at the airport I skipped the taxis and took a bus from gate 8 trying to be more cost-conscious this time around my hotel in patio was on Beach Road right in the middle of everything it was also close to terminal 21 where I’d read about a cheap food court I had also connected with with a freelance girl my friend knew and we’d been chatting on LINE I asked if she’d be willing to show me around Pattaya on my first day and exchange I offered to pay for her for her time.
When I arrived in Pattaya she invited me to her apartment for some good food I took a motorbike taxi gave the driver her address and off I went when I arrived another woman was there chatting endlessly on her phone the food was great and she introduced me to Tai whiskey something I have never tried before she made my first night in Pattaya Unforgettable and I felt like all my research had paid off a week flew by in what seemed like no time at all one day while grabbing lunch at Terminal 21 I decided to do some shopping I wandered into a clothing store and met a girl working there who immediately caught my eye she was stunning and after exchanging some small talk I worked up the courage to ask her if she’d join for dinner and drinks she laughed off at first acting shy but then gave me her line info and we made plans to meet up later that evening we decided to meet near iar as she wanted to have some fish for dinner when she showed up dressed differently from earlier I was blown away by how beautiful she looked we had dinner and afterwards we went to Lucifer’s bar to keep the night going.
A few drinks in she was dancing and having the time of her life around 3:00 a.m. we decided to call it a night but instead of heading to her place we ended up at my hotel for more drinks on the way she mentioned she’d like a bag at the mall and asked if I could buy it for her it was 5,000 bar to buy it I brushed it off figuring she was just Tipsy back in my hotel room I stepped out onto the balcony for a smoke a few minutes later she joined me asking for a cigarette I was a little on edge because she was talking loudly and I didn’t want complaints from the neighbors but what happened next nearly gave me a heart attack I looked over and there she was sitting on the balcony railing swaying dangerously while drunk we were on the third floor I stayed calm and moved slowly towards her I gently wrapped my arm around her waist just in case she lost her balance I whispered for her to come inside telling her it wasn’t safe out there she kept asking me if I really liked her and I just played along saying yes I like you let’s go inside I coaxed her back into the room but I couldn’t sleep after that I was worried she’d try something like that again.
My mind raced with visions of headlines about a foreigner pushing a girl off a balcony at around 700 a.m. she woke up and things took a surprising turn she started getting close and affectionate which I didn’t expect given how the night had gone after what you could call a good workout session we both finally fell asleep by 1 p.m. she was rushing to get dressed saying she’d be late for work I was relieved when she left because frankly she seemed a bit unstable I’ve dealt with emotional issues before and I knew I wasn’t equipped to handle someone who might be struggling with depression she kept messaging me afterwards but I made excuses saying I had plans with other friends on my last day in Pattaya I stopped by terminal 21 bought her a nice leather bag and went to her store to give it to her she wasn’t thrilled it wasn’t a designer bag after all but by then I didn’t care much it was clear she had expected more from me but I was already on my way out.
Story 7 A Dangerous Night in Pattaya
It was my first trip to Thailand in March 2014 and I was coming from an American winter very cold to a very hot Thailand I had already been in Patong for a few weeks and was getting used to the heat but not as much as I would have liked at that point I was Outdoors during the daytime but I was still walking bar to bar having cold drinks so I wouldn’t overheat while looking for some shade from the Sun I saw a shady soi off bangler Street I walked away to the end of the soy and I found myself in a bar I think it was called the Tropicana I was happy to get out of the Sun and get a cold beer even more happy to find it empty hoping for prompt service the young woman behind the bar quickly served me a beer and after about 5 minutes she disappeared.
I finished my beer and I was looking to pay for it leave and make my way closer to my hotel I waited about 15 minutes in an empty bar I would have left but I hadn’t paid for my beer yet in walked a Russian based on his accent anyway who seemed nice at first but also kept his distance from me after a bit of small talk he asked me if I wanted to earn some extra money.
Thinking of all the bad stories and movies I’ve seen about foreigners trying to earn extra money doing dodgy things in Thailand I immediately told him no and that I was not interested he then asked me if I was wealthy.
Why don’t you need extra money he asks I said no I was here for a vacation I think most English speakers call it a holiday and I didn’t want to worry about money while I was in Thailand I am guessing at this point he thought I had money I don’t and he got more persistent I kept telling him I was not interested at that point he started to get even more aggressive and more threatening I served in the USA military and was young enough and fit enough to not be worried I had an empty bottle on the bar that I’d been waiting 15 minutes to pay for I instantly put the empty beer bottle in my good hand waiting for the need to use it if something started.
A few words later I said let me guess you want me to do something illegal for you at that point he became very aggressive and angry he.
Even did a fake lunge at me to see my reaction which for me was to jump off my bar stool bottle in hand still over the tile bar where I could have used it after I told him about him wanting me to do something criminal for him he said how do you know this I explained I’ve seen movies like that he then faked another lunge at me and told me now that I know you I will have to kill you I replied you don’t have to kill anybody he left but he was very very unhappy.
Story 8 A Scooter Ride Becomes a Warning
While I was in Pattaya I was walking around alone my friend was not feeling well so I decided to still walk around around on my own for the most part it was safe and it was fun however a little later maybe around 2 p 10: p.m. I started talking to two girls on a scooter and they wanted to take me for a ride I thought why not this.
Seemed fun I got behind the girl driving the bike and the other girl got behind me and we took off I noticed that we quickly started leaving the main area of Pattaya where the tourists are I could also feel the girl behind me searching my pockets luckily I had my wallet chain to my belt because when she pulled on it.
Immediately became aware that things were not right I panicked and they eventually pulled the bike over as I threatened to take us all down by moving my body in a way that caused the scooter to sway side by side the woman with her hands in my pocket was able to get about 5,000 bar because I had just gotten cash from the ATM and had put it into my.
Pocket instead of my wallet I chose to let her have it rather than try to get the money back as things could have turned violent I considered it the cost of being an idiot I was worried that they were going to get male friends so I immediately started taking turns and again making my way back at a very fast pace they had.
Approached me right after I got my money from the ATM and knew I had just put it in my pocket they left me about 3 miles from where I was so I was more concerned about getting back to a safe area I’m not sure where they were taking me but it could have been to some bad people.
The main thing I changed was that I only withdrew money from the ATM during the daytime usually in the morning and immediately went back to my room to put my cards and valuables in the safe so I only had a bit of cash to lose I also stopped talking to women who approached me on scooters.
