Thailand Lessons From Phuket Nana Pattaya and Love

After hearing many of your subscribers’ stories I thought I would send you mine as I think it’s an amusing lesson and that I pretty well got my just desserts. It could have ended a lot worse.

This was about 15 years ago. I was on holiday in Phuket staying at the quiet Laguna area and met up with a couple of guys staying at the same resort. We headed into Patong for a night out on the town. We found some bars on Walking Street and after a few drinks we made our way into one of the upstairs clubs for some rowdy music more drinks and into the spirit of the evening. There were quite a few ladies and after a while one latched on to me and we were soon getting closer if you know what I mean. While she wasn’t much of a looker she was a party girl with lots of personality which I liked. After a while we left the club and went downstairs to where the bar top dancers were and had a few more drinks.

I was as you English say ‘giving it large.’ I was by now quite drunk and in my mind thought I was the ultimate playboy and started to think how it would be fun to party with two ladies. I saw another lady I thought was pretty and my first lady was up for it so I invited her over. The second girl was attractive but couldn’t speak much English but girl one was a good English speaker and we made it work.

After a few more drinks and taking into account the fact that any common sense had long since left me the three of us headed off and we jumped into a tuk tuk. Shortly after getting into the tuk tuk one girl seemed to have given out to the effects of the night’s drinking and became sleepy and pretty much incoherent. Not to worry we cracked on. We ended up way out in the sticks where one of the girls had a single room shack on the hill set back from the road. This place had no mod cons at all. We laid girl one down to sleep and girl two and I got acquainted and cemented our brief relationship which I was sure would hold her in good stead for future engagements.

I dressed made a generous monetary compensation for the evening’s efforts including leaving a tip for girl one who slept through the events. I bid farewell to girl number two and left the shack and walked down the track leading to the road thinking ‘How the hell am I going to get a tuk tuk way out here at like two o’clock in the morning?’

I was only at the door for about 15 seconds and I had just made it to the road and heard some yelling coming from the direction of the shack. I looked back to see girl one running down the hill barefoot holding her high heel shoe and yelling. ‘Well that was a quick recovery from her alcoholic slumber’ I thought but that was the least of my immediate concerns. Having a ranting girl coming at me ‘You pay me! You pay me!’ she was shouting into the night. She caught up with me and I told her I’d already given money for her but she wasn’t having any of it.

Running From the Barefoot Girl

I walked away and there was a bar a little back from the road that was still open with mostly male Thai men as customers so I went in and ordered a drink and asked the barman if he could call me a taxi or a tuk tuk. Looking back I guess that was a bit too much to hope for.

Not to be deterred by my very rational explanation of the payment arrangements there was girl one now shouting at everyone in the bar ‘Farang cheating Thai girls! He bad man!’ Well okay she had a point and she had a captive audience of fellow countrymen. So my head was telling me to get the heck out of there and quickly. So I left hurriedly and ran down the road. I got to the road with girl one close behind me. I then continued in flight mode and started running down the road. Unfortunately for me I had picked a girl who seemed to be an athlete by her current running abilities. There she was running down the road barefoot holding her high heels. I guess running barefoot is not unusual for girls in Thailand.

Anyway I must have run about 500 meters at least and found a tuk tuk stop but no tuk tuk. So I waited but unfortunately girl one caught up with me in no time and she started shouting again. There was no way I was going to fight with this girl for obvious reasons so I took out a couple of thousand Baht and threw it at her. She swiped at me with her high heels and left a cut on my arm as I tried to deflect the attack. Then unbelievably a tuk tuk arrived. I jumped in the back and yelled ‘Laguna Beach please.’ To my relief the tuk tuk driver took off but the girl ran after the tuk tuk screaming and yelling as we drove away. To show my displeasure at the sad turn of events we were about 300 meters away and I gave her the middle finger.

The tuk tuk abruptly stopped. Oh my god. The girl quickened her pace towards us. The tuk tuk driver got out and came around to the side. I was dreading what was about to happen. He looked at me and then he pointed to girl one making her way towards us. ‘She’ he said. Then he laughed. He got back into the driver’s seat and we took off to the safety of Laguna Beach.

The next morning I met up with my friend from the resort. ‘How did you get on last night?’ he asked. I was a real idiot and I’m lucky to have lived to tell the tale.

Story Two A Gentleman in Nana Plaza

Fast forward to 2022. I’m not yet married my then fiancée and I have split up. I never got the ring back and I was a bit bitter about the train wreck relationship. I figured ‘Why not? I would go to Thailand and see the kingdom as it was without her nagging me and getting me upset each time.’ So off I went to Thailand and boy I had the most enjoyable holiday to date. I chose my hotel room around Sukhumvit and Nana Plaza was a regular visit during my three week holiday.

The current issue I had is do I go around the go go bars and watch my money deplete very rapidly? I have seen some foreign men nurse a beer for half an hour or so but that’s just not me. I can walk in with the best plan in the world but once I’ve had a bit too much to drink I’m suddenly buying lots of lady drinks and tipping a bit too generously. I live in a small town in Australia and a night out doesn’t cost that much. However as you know there is much more to spend your money on in Thailand.

At the time I was in my mid 20s and quite well built. I’m not a bad looking guy if I might say so myself but as you know go go dancers and bar girls don’t care about this in the slightest. All they care about is the cash in your pocket. I also met several girls on Tinder. They weren’t after my money short term but I guess long term they were looking for somebody to take care of them and maybe their family members financially.

I met this wonderful influencer model on Tinder who funny enough had her picture stolen by a lady I matched on Tinder while back in Australia. We instantly clicked and started chatting about how funny that there’s someone using her photos to catfish men in Australia. This led to dates and a few nights of aerobics. After those few nights she decided to be my holiday girlfriend and stay with me for the few days I had left in Bangkok.

I’m a quiet guy and I’m respectful of women. I normally keep my hands to myself on a date so visiting Nana Plaza was quite a shock for me. I witnessed several men acting absolutely disgraceful. We all like female company but even though these girls do what they do in the bars because they have to eat I think it’s very important especially as an Asian man to show respect to the person. I was sitting in a go go bar and across from me was a guy with one of the dancers. He was forcing his hand in places he shouldn’t have been and the girl although putting on a brave face was obviously not enjoying this kind of treatment as she kept trying to pull his hands away. This went on about 10 minutes.

The girl who was with this guy kept looking up at me as if to say ‘Help me out.’ The girl I was sitting with could see my obvious discomfort at what I was watching and I also looked pretty disgusted looking over at them.

Helping the Dancer in Nana Plaza

Luckily not long after the guy paid his bill and left. The girl came over to me and asked if she could join me and the girl I was with. She wasn’t really my type but I was happy to buy her a drink and let her relax for a while after her ordeal with Ape Man I guess he was doing the rounds in order to harass as many girls as he could in a single evening. I ended up buying the two girls plenty of drinks and I got pretty drunk. It was expensive but I felt good about all of us enjoying our time together.

Some will say I was acting like a white knight but I don’t really care because honestly I guess what I’m really trying to say is that the girls who work in Nana Plaza are human beings and shouldn’t be treated like an object if she clearly doesn’t enjoy it. I know most men are respectful but there’s a tiny few that are very unpleasant people. So please consider the lady when you’re doing things in public especially if you haven’t paid her for her time and worse you have no intention to do so.

Story Three The Joiner Fee Drama

I have many stories from my first trip to Thailand in 2019 but I thought I would start with a rather hilarious story that happened to me. This one is rather short

I’m a 45 year old American and I went on a solo trip to Thailand for my first time in March of 2019. I was staying at a very nice five star resort in Pattaya that was within walking distance from Walking Street. On around the third day I noticed that the toilet in my room was functioning strangely so I contacted the front desk. After some investigation the staff determined that they would need to do repairs that would take some time so I was offered an upgrade room in the tower. I said ‘Sure why not?’ it’s always nice to get a free upgrade and a change of scenery.

The front desk staff offered me a look at the room before I packed everything up and relocated so I accepted the offer. As I approached the front desk I noticed that a short stocky man was talking very loudly and being quite aggressive with an employee at the front desk. As I approached the desk the employee recognized me and immediately pointed to the elevator and rushed over to the elevator doors to meet me. She seemed happy to have an excuse to get away from what seemed like an uncomfortable situation. She quickly entered the elevator first and I followed. When I turned around I noticed that the strange man had followed us into the elevator and was getting increasingly angry and aggressive. I could now plainly see that the guy was FaceTiming with a woman who was also very angry and yelling in their native language.

‘What the hell is going on here?’ I thought to myself. Still I thought this was none of my business and maybe the guy was just going up to his room so I ignored him.

We had a very uncomfortable ride up to the fifth floor and I exited the elevator. To my surprise the guy exited the elevator and began to follow us. At this point I had had enough. It became clear that I was going to have to get aggressive with this guy because I was not going to have some strange man know which room I was staying in. I stood in front of the man and I told him that he was not going to take another step. I don’t believe he spoke much English but I think a six foot 220 pound sweaty farang angrily pointing back at the elevator and yelling ‘Go!’ seemed to get the message across. He initially seemed like he was going to get aggressive but backed down and my new friend returned to the elevator.

Once in my room the hotel staff apologized profusely. I asked if she was okay and was surprised when she answered with ‘Oh it’s okay this happens all the time.’ ‘Really?’ I replied. ‘Why was he so angry?’ She then giggled and told me that my new friend’s wife had called the hotel inquiring about some hotel charges. All of a sudden it all clicked and I burst out laughing. I knew exactly what was going on and I bet you savvy Pattaya veterans have already figured it out.

The Joiner Fee Drama Unfolds

As I’m sure you know most of the modern hotel chains have websites or mobile apps that allow convenient access to hotel services and billing. Apparently my new friend foolishly charged a few joiner fees to his room and must have forgotten that his wife had easy access to his hotel account. The wife called the hotel to find out the situation and put the hotel staff in a very tough situation. The husband was of course denying that the charges were his and was trying to blame it on the staff. What wasn’t clear to me until later was when I approached the front desk he was trying unsuccessfully to convince his wife of his innocence by FaceTiming with her to the hotel staff and trying to convince them to lie for him.

Upon returning to the lobby the man still had his wife on FaceTime and didn’t seem to be having much luck with the staff cooperating in his scheme. I was tempted to grab a seat and continue to watch the drama but the beautiful ladies of Walking Street were waiting.

Story Four The Long Road to Love

I wish I had a wild story to tell as mine seems tame compared to others I’ve heard but I hope you find it interesting.

I knew long ago that I was attracted to Asian women. It’s not only how they look I love the long black hair and almond eyes but also the way they treat their men. I think it’s just in their DNA to be good mates for the most part. Plus they usually stay in good shape and look young for a long time. My ex wife and the mother of my son and only child is Thai but she grew up in the USA so my experience with her was not the same as being with someone that grew up in Thailand. Now all Asian women are great as some of your stories show but given a choice my first choice is usually Asian.

My ex wife and I got married young and although we tried hard over time we grew apart. After my divorce and being married to her for 10 years I dated many women which included Japanese Filipinos Taiwanese Korean and Thai as well as American women. Different Asians have their own different traits. For example I haven’t dated a Chinese woman yet but from talking to them they seem to worship money. Filipinos seem to always be happy talkative and ready for anything while Japanese and Koreans are more reserved and shy and they want to get to know you at least in my experience. But my favorite has always been Thais. The easygoing personality as well as their overall beauty are a major draw.

With my job I can travel into other countries. Dating women from my own country I have absolutely no interest in getting serious with American women. The way they think and act is just not what I want. I don’t think I’m alone in feeling this way.

Anyway sometime around 2012 a married Thai friend of mine knew I was single and told me she had a Thai friend that had a sister that was interested in meeting someone from another country. The friend would arrange all expenses for me to go to Thailand to meet her sister under the condition that if we liked each other our relationship would develop I would be serious about marriage with her. This was a big gamble since I had only seen a photo. This was before video chat and apps but I thought to myself ‘Free trip to Thailand why not?’ So without knowing much more I said yes and after arranging time off work I was going to Thailand for the first time. I was very excited.

When I landed a friend of the friend picked me up at the airport. I can’t recall her name but we’ll just call her Om. She was in her late 30s or mid 40s short round and although not ugly I was not attracted to her. She spoke English and told me I would be staying at her house so she drove me for what seemed like a very long time and I had no idea where I was going. It was nighttime and I couldn’t even see my surroundings. When we finally arrived I could see we were at a house out in the country.

Staying at Oms House

I’m an adventurous type of guy but I began to think of various horror movie scenarios movies where I always think ‘How could that tourist be so stupid and trusting to just ride along to some place without knowing where they were going?’ It’s no wonder they end up slaughtered. But I had nothing to worry about. Om showed me the room where I would be sleeping and after a shower jet lag set in and I slept.

When I woke in the morning we got on the phone and tried to arrange to meet the sister I was there to meet but she wasn’t able to meet me. Something had come up and she was busy. Long story short this went on for a few days until I started to figure out she wasn’t serious about meeting me. So I decided to enjoy my free trip to Thailand. I decided to fly to Phuket for a few days. Here is where things get strange Om decided she wanted to go to Phuket too. I didn’t mind since she might make a good guide but I wanted to make it clear that I was staying in my own room and we were not going as a couple.

I was hoping I might meet someone I was attracted to and I did not want Om blocking my flow if you know what I mean.

So we went to Phuket and I got a massage and had some fun with the massage girl after she got off work. I went to Tiger Kingdom a great park and Bangla Road. That was my first and only time going into a go go bar in Thailand. I didn’t stay long because I already knew the game these girls were there to pay their bills and at that time I really wasn’t interested in that kind of fun. Plus Om was kind of hanging on to me. She was talking to my friend back in the US on the phone and she put me on the phone. My friend was laughing when she told me that Om wanted me and that if I was interested it would be a good deal she owned her own house and land and would make a good wife.

I tried my best not to show on my face the shock I was feeling inside. How was I supposed to answer with her standing right there looking at me? I don’t recall what I said but I figured it was time to bring my trip to a close. So after flying back to Bangkok and going back to Om’s house after a few days I headed back home. Some guys might have at least given Om a good time for being a host but that would open a can of worms and it just wasn’t my style. But I had been bitten by the Thailand bug and I planned to return.

Meeting Rinam

A few years passed and that same Thai friend told me her sister had a friend named Rinam that lived in Koh Samui and that maybe we might hit it off. Rinam was slim and cute and friendly so we started talking on the phone and things seemed to go well. Rinam had a daughter and they both spoke English well. I won’t go through all the details of our courtship but there were many phone calls and now emails. After a while I decided to go to Thailand to meet her. She met me at the airport in Bangkok and we were happy to see each other. In the taxi on the way to the hotel I leaned over to get a kiss and her breath was not pleasant. At the time I couldn’t put my finger on the smell but she had told me previously that she didn’t smoke.

I don’t smoke and after dating a Korean girl that smoked I said I would never do it again. When we got to the hotel and showered she brushed her teeth and it was no longer an issue. I found out years later that she was a smoker.

That night there was some aerobics and the trip was a good one. We went all over Bangkok to shopping malls and street markets and we even took a small trip to Ayutthaya. We decided to continue the relationship and talked about marriage. The next time I visited her she brought her daughter to meet me. She came running to meet me at the airport calling out ‘Daddy!’ This took me by surprise. I wondered if Rinam had told her daughter to call me that and run to me. I had talked to both her and her daughter on the phone but I wasn’t expecting her to call me daddy yet. It felt a little staged. But her daughter was cute and the most surprising thing was that she did actually look like me. We did family stuff together and her daughter grew on me quickly.

People would look at us and already think we were a family.

We decided to marry and after several months Rinam got her visa and she and her daughter were on their way to me in the USA. Rinam seemed to change after arriving in the USA. She became very lazy. She did not want to get a job but spent most of her day sitting around the house on her phone. She would play video games such as Candy Crush and Pokemon or she would be on social media constantly. After a while this started to irritate me especially when I would work all day and have to come home and do house chores that she could have done things like the laundry and sometimes cooking dinner. She wouldn’t even change clothes or try to look pretty or sexy when I got home. It got to the point where we weren’t even having aerobics because I was always irritated.

We had a discussion where I let her know things needed to change for the better or we’re going to have to reevaluate our situation. A few more months passed and things did not improve so we decided to part ways. We parted as friends and I told her I would help her do whatever she wanted to do until she got on her feet. I felt bad about it but I felt she was taking me for granted and if we both were unhappy the best thing to do was to end it. So we did and Rinam moved on. A few years later I heard that she was remarried and pregnant good for her.

Meeting Mae

Well a few more years passed and I decided to give Thailand yet another go. I got on Tinder and started meeting many Thai women online. It seems to be usual to meet several and then start sifting through them and end up with a single one. This is how I met Mae from Isaan. This was about 2019 and I was 56. Mae was 35 and had two daughters. By then I had been to Thailand four or five times. Mae was pretty but there was no spark at first. I think possibly it was because I really preferred meeting someone with no children or older kids so we could be more free to travel and also I had already raised my own son I didn’t want more babies.

Mae and I talked online for a few months and then I don’t know why exactly everything fizzled away and we did not talk for a month or two. But something happened suddenly and we both missed each other and started talking again. There was a spark for sure now. I made plans to go visit her and then COVID hit and travel screeched to a halt. Every time I planned to go something would happen. The sandbox and all the other schemes to get into the country were a pain it was very frustrating. My June plans got cancelled and so in July and August and finally October of 2021 I was able to go see her using the Phuket Sandbox. During this time I was watching everything on YouTube about Thailand.

Mae and I had already decided to be exclusive and I tried to make it work. She had her own home business but had to shut it down due to the pandemic. She was not getting much help from her daughters’ father so I stepped in and started helping her. We had so much in common I really enjoyed her company. I just went to see her in June 2022 and I am going back this October. We have had some ups and downs but we work it out and I think I have finally found the woman that will be with me for the rest of my life. She has only had one man in her life before me and has never worked as a bar girl or in a go go bar.

There are many things I love about her but one thing that comes to mind is how she appreciates the little things. She only makes me want to do more when she is so excited and grateful for little things I do for her. So we plan to marry this year and this story has not ended yet I will come back with an update after she and the girls arrive in the USA and we start our new life together.

Final Thoughts on Western Women

One last thing to say Western women American European etc. may wonder why men like going to Asia and Thailand in particular. They like to look down on men that make those trips. They wonder why men will travel all the way across the globe and get into a long distance relationship when there are plenty of women locally. What I have found is that Western women seem to not need a man. They have careers jobs and some want to take the role of a man. In my experience of dating American women they wanted to be treated like a lady but don’t act like one you can’t have it both ways. I can’t speak for all men only myself.

And if I have to choose between an overweight materialistic harpy with an attitude that rations out sex as she deems fit or a Thai woman that is beautiful in shape passionate and provides an atmosphere where we can both be good to each other physically and otherwise well my friends that is a no brainer.