My Bangkok Bar Girl From Hell Story
Like so many of these stories, mine is similar as in it starts out like a fairytale and ends in money being lost, heartbroken and just yesterday threatened with police.
Falling In Love With Thailand After The First Trip
So I arrived in September 2023 for my 3rd visit to Thailand in just 12 months, I am 41 and only visited here for the 1st time in September 2022.
Fell in love with the people, the culture and everything from the wild nights on Khosan road, bars on and off Sukhumvit, to relaxing in a hut on phi phi don islands.
So after arriving in September 2023 for a 2 week holiday alone, I am out for drinks on my 2nd night, i go around a few bars until I see this girl from a bar on soi 4 not far from nana plaza.
She takes my breath away literally, beautiful slim, Thai girl.
I offer her a drink straight away, start chatting and playing pool.
She speaks very little English and i noticed the mamasan is close by watching us a little more than they normally do in the bars, but we get on great using translate to communicate and we played pool for maybe 4/5 drinks.
@talesfromthethaiside Meeting A Thai Bar Girl and Falling In Love 😳🇹🇭 #bargirls #thaibargirl #bangkok #thaigirls #asiangirls
Asking The Mamasan If I Can Bar Fine Her Girl
After, I asked does she want to come back with me and how much, the mamasan stepped in and said she was new here and they started to speak in Thai.
She must of asked the girl is she was comfortable leaving with me as she was new to bar.
The girl was laughing, she was happy and replied yes.
I think I paid barfine 500 bhat but can’t remember to be honest.
Through mamasan I agreed to pay the girl 5000 bhat the next morning when she leaves.
@talesfromthethaiside Datinf A Bar Girl In Thailand 🇹🇭😳 #bargirls #dating #thaigirls #thaibargirls #pattayatrip
We leave the bar and travel to Khosan road by tuk tuk as my hotel was close to there.
laughing all the way there, smiling at each other, enjoying our first kiss, couldn’t keep my hands off her, she was a 10/10 in terms of looks and her playful personality seem to match mine.
I had been looking for a long term Thai partner and this girl instantly ticked all the boxes, I asked questions and she explained over the first hour, she only just started working in bar.
I know now this is a common theme with these girls.
Background About My New Bar Girl
She moved from issan to Bangkok to earn money for family and has no partner or children, she told me she was 24 and her birthday was coming up, the birthday part was true at least.
We had one of the best nights of my life on Khosan, an then obviously it got ridiculously wild back at my hotel untill the early hours.
The next morning/afternoon, we enjoy food together in bed, chatting away using translate, still loving every second of each others company.
@talesfromthethaiside Taking 2 Bar Girls To The Hotel 🇹🇭😳 #thaibargirls #bargirls #thaigirls #shortime #thailandstory
I left the 5,000 bhat I agreed to next to her bag on the side table.
I told her on translate “your money is there for you”.
she was very happy and put the money into her bag, but she did not try to get dressed or leave, she just got back into bed.
I had made it known to her while drunk the previous night that I was looking for a life partner, too early to say this, I wish I had waited but drink and how I thought we connected convinced me to tell her.
Spoiling Thai Bar Girls On The First Night
So she stay in bed, we continue to get on great and talk about the night before, she couldn’t say thank you enough, after I had bought her a few items, like shoes, clothes, small gifts for family etc.
I consider myself a generous man, so the previous before we went back to the hotel, any shop or market stall we walked by I would look and ask do you want this?
Or go try them on if you like I will buy.
So we are talking in bed still and I mention going to the island just off Pattaya, telling her I went there last year and it was amazing.
She tells me she’s never been to an island.
(I Seen lots of pictures later on, she’s been to islands many times)
She gets really excited, and I say I will pay for everything, pay bar fine and sort her out with something.
We didn’t agree a price, as at this point we didn’t know how many days we would be going for.
We travel to Pattaya the next morning by taxi, and over to island by boat.
We had 3 great days there with good weather on beach, very drunk with locals and had an amazing time.
I bought her more clothes while on island, hats, trainers, bikinis, anything she wanted I bought without hesitation.
@talesfromthethaiside Taking a thai bar girl on vacation 😳🇹🇭 #bargirls #thaigirls #thailandstory #thaibargirls #thailandtravel
Planning More Adventures With My New Thai Girl Love
Returning to Bangkok and to my hotel after 3 days on island.
We again plan to meet later that night for her birthday night and I had paid the bar fine through a banking app.
So she leaves me to go to her room for the first time since we met.
I give her about 1000 bhat to cover taxi and anything she needed until later on.
We agree to meet at her bar that night where I will bar fine her again.
She tells me she won’t go near another man, which makes me very happy.
I go shopping, and buy her an expensive bag with small matching purse for her birthday, I arrive at bar to see her waiting alone for me.
At this point I am definitely falling for this girl.
We stay a for a few drinks and birthday cake, then we leave and go to another bar that she wanted to visit because she had friends there who also had a cake for her.
@talesfromthethaiside My Thai Bar Girl Left Me For Another Guy 🇹🇭😳 #thaigirls #thaibargirls #bargirls #thaigirlfriend #storytime
Asking My Girl If She And Her Friend Would Like A Threesome
We stayed there for quite a few hours, I notice another girl that has been speaking to my girl all night, she is cute and because I am very drunk, I ask my girl would she join us for bedroom fun tonight if I bar fined her friend.
She laughs and tells her friend what I ask, they both laugh and talk in Thai for a bit, but the signs clearly tell me she is ok with it and they both seem happy.
I spoke to the girl and mamasan, agreed a price of 4,000 for the girl and 500 for barfine.
We stay and play pool together for a bit, 3 of us now flirting together.
We leave and go back to the hotel, we have shower and get into bed, still drinking all together My girl seems happy with what is going on, but as we actually get down to it, she stands up and goes the toilet so I just carried on with the 2nd girl.
She walks back in and I can tell by her face she is not happy, I am shocked because up until now it was all good.
I stopped and it kind of went awkward, the other girl could also tell that she wasn’t happy now.
No arguing, just awkward atmosphere.
I had also booked 3 flights for us all to go to Phuket the next night while drunk together in room.
Anyway, we had maybe one more drink, I pay the girl 4,000 baht and my girl says, am going to go as well.
I am shocked because this is not something I thought would happen.
I can tell she is angry now and just wants to leave, so I give her maybe 2,000 or whatever I had left on me, she leaves with the girl, and I’m thinking they are going home.
Flights to Phuket aren’t mentioned.
@talesfromthethaiside Tgai girlfriend wants miney 🇹🇭💰 #thaigirlfriend #thaigirls #bargirls #thaibargirls
Giving Mixed Signals
I messaged her and said, “I asked you if you were ok with this, I would not have done it if you would have said no”
I go to sleep, and wake up to messages and pictures of her looking sad in the bar, still drinking. I notice she had left her bracelets and watch next to sink in bathroom.
She gets upset telling me that I don’t want her, I explain again, that the other girl was just some fun which I asked her about first.
anyway she agrees to come back with this other older friend who apparently looked after her when she came to Bangkok at the start.
We go for food and her friend helps me to explain to her, I did ask and if she didn’t want this she only had to say no to me and it would not have happened.
Anyway we sort this out, and we agree to go Phuket just us 2.
I Have the best time of my life, never experienced the islands here so it was just unreal.
We went on 2 private boat excursions around islands, lots of drinks, music, paddle boards, unbelievable days I will never forget, and we stayed on phi phi right on the beach in a hut style place, the 5 days there was like a dream.
We talk a lot more now about the future and what we both want, and saying we love each other.
At this point we are together as boyfriend and girlfriend.
“I Will Not Go With Customer, I Wait Only You!”
She agreed that when I eventually go home to the UK, She will not go with any man, only drink and play pool.
I agree to help her with money when she needs it, we talk more and start to plan a future together.
I say I will come back after Christmas to see her, and we will go to meet her family in issan.
We arrive back in Bangkok, have a couple more nights there before I have to travel home.
It’s been a whirlwind romance and we both feel that we are deeply in love with each other, after only 14 nights, meeting her the 2nd day I arrived, I spent my whole time with her.
She comes with me in the Taxi to the airport where I gave her about 10,000 bhat and we say are goodbyes All this time I had only been paying the bar fine, she didn’t take money off me daily, I just paid for everything.
Keeping In Contact With A Bar Girl
I fly home, and we continue to talk as often as we can.
She video called me every 30 minutes it seemed at the start, keeping in touch with me, showing me that she is just playing pool and drinking with customers.
As hard as it still was, I accepted this as this was her job before I met her, and without me taking her out of that situation I can’t really have a opinion but I was happy with the constant contact from her.
I sent her money every few days, when she needs it.
Then one night she tells me she has had been arguing with girls from her bar, She says it’s because they are older than her, and she makes more money from drinks which they don’t like.
Seems viable because she is by far the nicest looking girl at this bar, so I believe her and at this point I had no reason not too.
She gets very upset, telling me she won’t have anywhere to live if she leaves the bar because she lives above it, but the girls are making her life hell.
Paying Rent For A Bangkok Bar Girl
So she talks about getting her friend to come and work with her that way, they can share an apartment and go halves on the rent, but mentions she will need a deposit and months rent upfront, because her friend won’t have nothing until she works.
After discussing and looking at places, I agree to pay 14,000 upfront for deposit and rent.
Her friend moves from issan and starts work with her in a new bar away from previous girls.
Everything seems great, she is still in touch with me but less than before.
She says it because this bar is busier and the mamasan does not like girls on their phones, so they have to put them into a basket by till.
She still calls me while in work when she goes toilet but it’s every hour or 2 now and never really at a table or by pool table, always on the road or the toilet.
A few weeks pass by, and she starts saying in messages that her phone is getting really hot.
I don’t really pay attention to it, until one day while she is on video call to me on her way to work, she says the phone is very hot and says she will let it cool down when she gets to work and will call me back soon.
A couple of hours pass by, with no contact.
I try messaging and calling with no response.
After 4/5 hours I am thinking the worst, and I start think has she been offered a lot of money to go with a man and she has took it.
or has she been hurt in an accident, I couldn’t think of a reason to ignore me like she was.
1 day passes, then 2, 3, and 4 days pass with no contact, I have probably sent 30 messages and made countless calls to her, with no response, phone always just rang out but messages were delivered, so I knew it was switched on.
Finding Out My New Thai Girl Is Not As Faithful As She Said She Was
I was out my mind with worry and disappointed she could do this, I contacted her old friend from previous bar, asking had she heard from her and explained what had happened.
Her ex friend tells me, she is on an island with a man from Singapore that she had met before me.
I am so shocked and devastated that she could do this.
Her ex friend finds a picture of them together on the island and sends me it.
I wait now, thinking I know what she will say.
This is why she kept saying her phone was hot the days leading up-to her meeting him.
So she could lie to me and say it’s been in shop getting fixed. Exactly that happened, she video calls me out the blue with all the apologies saying she just got her phone back from the shop after it had been fixed.
I confront her and sent her the picture of her with this man.
The look on her face was priceless as she was so confused about how I could have this picture and how I know about them.
She gets upset, as do I, knowing how much I have done for her.
She starts to explain about this man while sitting in the apartment I paid for.
They did meet before me, but he was just a friend, he had a wife and kids and they never slept together.
I was stupid to believe this but I still loved her and could see how upset she was.
However, I now know she was just putting on an act.
We talk about all the things we had mentioned in the previous weeks, about our future, marriage, children and everything else, asking her was this all a lie? She made me believe it was really what she wanted and she just felt sorry for this man who had already planned to visit her before she met me.
I didn’t know what to believe, all I wanted was her to be honest and she’s telling me all the right things I Should have walked away as soon as I found out about this man but I didn’t.
It turns out later that it wasn’t just him.
So, the story gets a bit more messy from here.
My Girl Is Already Married To A Thai Man
Her ex friend also told me, she was already married to a man from issan, who knows about her job and just expects money to be sent to him in return for his wife being in Bangkok.
When I asked my girl about this, she tells me it’s true, but she has split up from her husband, with plans to divorce him and does not send him money.
So obviously my head is everywhere and she is telling me how sorry she was, saying all the things we had planned are true and she only wants me.
This picture that her ex friend sent of the Singapore man came from Facebook.
I deleted any account I had years ago because previous relationship with my sons mother, say 11 years ago, so I did not use Facebook.
Though after this, I created an account to follow my partner and make sure I knew everything. She shown me her husband and this man from Singapore.
We put ourselves into the type relationship that I was comfortable with, making sure she was not lying about what she was telling me.
Moving Forward, Ignoring The Red Flags
Her family and friends added me, and it seemed to be all real and totally genuine at this point.
We speak again like we did at the start of our relationship, but the bar work still got to me, as I know what goes in a bar.
If you buy a girl a drink, she is expected to sit and offer some intimacy, this is how bars work, and even though she told me she just drinks and plays pool, my head tells me more than that happens even if she is not leaving the bar with a customer.
At this point I can’t accept her drinking with men and after her antics, mistrust is definitely playing a part now.
When we spoke about future in the past, she had asked me to pay for her family home to be finished, she said it would be 400,000 bhat.
She also mentioned dowry which is separate payment, but I need to discuss with her father about this.
So another week goes by, and communicating with her, she seems happy to make me comfortable by leaving the bar work and going back home, but wants me to visit first.
So I book more flights and I am back in Bangkok November 2023, I sent money for a car to hire so she can pick me up from airport and we drive to issan.
Long drive, but worth it.
Seeing The Real Thailand, Not Just Bangkok
I got to see lots of Thailand that you wouldn’t normally see, beautiful place and still want to retire there even after all of this.
We arrive at her home about an hour from ubon, meet her immediate family, mother, father, and siblings.
I had paid for a room not too far from the family home as didn’t want to be sleeping with their daughter the first time we meet.
We stayed there with her family for 4 days, it was amazing meeting them and her friends.
I also bought them a pool table for their home and had it delivered before we arrived, we had a great time and the family seemed very happy to meet me and accepted me being with their daughter.
During the visit, we discussed money with the family.
Here Comes The Money.. Dowery And House Build
I agreed to pay 400,000 for the house build plus 200,000 for dowry.
I had never done this type of thing before and was probably naive at best, absolutely stupid at worst.
I did agree to send money for home before Christmas, I wish I never agreed to this because we didn’t plan to get married until maybe Feb/march time.
So we return to Bangkok, say our goodbyes and I fly home, I only stayed 1 week on this trip.
We speak lots and I send money as usual when she needs it.
A few weeks go by, and I notice lots of things to do with other men again on Facebook.
She was always online and starting to not reply to me, telling me she fell asleep.
just lots of things that did not add up.
Maybe I was a little paranoid, but I had every reason to be.
When I questioned her about my suspicions or had concerns, she would get very defensive telling me that she had done everything to make me feel comfortable, and won’t explain about anything else to me.
She would make me feel like I am in the wrong for asking about these men all over her Facebook, when all I have done is look after her.
At this point I definitely have insecurities about what will happen when I send this 400,000 bhat for her families house.
My own family are aware of the situation and tell me to wait until we are married before I send any money.
They obviously warned me that I have only known this girl for less than 3 months.
Now Im Having Doubts… Is It All About Money?
I start to doubt her even more when I suggest that we should get married sooner and I will send the money the day of marriage.
She really does not like this idea.
It’s goes on for a few more weeks, arguing over what I will do, until Christmas finally hits and she asks “where is the money?”.
I replied that I want to wait, I will book flights for January and we will get married.
I told her that I was looking to travel to her around the 15th.
Again she replied angrily saying I am bad man for not sending the money, I have brought a lot of shame on the family because the neighbours and everyone knows I was sending money to build the house.
I think to myself, I couldn’t care less what anyone thinks, I do understand status is everything to some people but not to me.
So I continue to hold firm and say not until we get married will I send money.
A day or so before new year, she tells me, she is having party with family tonight and will not be speaking to me, says she does not have to make me feel comfortable anymore because I did not send the money.
I don’t hear from her for 3 days, making me sick with worry about who she has been with now.
I am contacting people to find out we’re she is.
I even had a man message me showing me their conversation with her, saying he is picking her up to go out for drinks and stuff.
@talesfromthethaiside Spent Over 100k On A Thai Bar Girl🇹🇭😳 #thaigirls #bargirls #thaigirlfriend #thailandtrip
Regrets and Relief That Big Money Was Not Sent
I am broken at this point, I am a mess, sending her messages crying like a stupid farang.
I started to realised it was all a lie from the start.
she just saw that I was a very generous man.
All she wanted was my money, there was never any marriage going to happen.
I do regret posting some pictures of her, I was drunk and very angry about what she had tried to do to me, I covered her face but called her the devil so this didn’t go down too well, but I deleted the pictures not long after I posted.
She then claimed she will get me blacklisted from Thailand, I don’t know how true this is, but she told me I will get arrested if I try to enter.
Added up, I sent over 127,000 bhat in 3 months in transfers while in uk.
God knows how much spent while with her on 2 trips, plus 42,000 on gold she had in a pawn shop.
If it was true love, all she had to do was wait 2 weeks for me to return to get married, send the money to the family and live
I am so happy I decided to wait to send the big money.
I did not hear from her again but found out she went back to work in another bar.
That’s my experience with a bar girl anyway, I plan to return soon but definitely won’t be falling in love again so quick if I meet someone to be a life partner she will be from a small village and no where near a bar.
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