Thailand Retirement Story and Discovering Southeast Asia

When I realized how bad a position I was in, I nearly had a heart attack. I’d blindly allowed myself to be pulled into something I didn’t fully understand. I thought everything was going well. I thought I was putting the last pieces in place for my dream retirement in the land of smiles.

But the problem only really hit me when I realized what I’d done. And by then, I’d already done it. That was the moment I took a step back and started to worry about what could happen next. Like many people, I had come to the conclusion that I could have retirement in Thailand easier than how I could have retirement at home. Just how expensive things were getting a home made me realize that I would always be paying catchup.

Regardless of how hard I worked or how hard I tried, there was always that one extra bill to pay for or that extra emergency that crops up. That meant instead of putting money away for retirement, things just continued in a neverending spiral. I was divorced at 47 and a 50, although I didn’t have much money, I decided to take 3 months out for myself. Probably the first time in my life when I’d actually had some time to just kick back and relax.

Discovering Southeast Asia

I headed to Southeast Asia, going first to the Philippines. I’d always been interested in Southeast Asia the things I read online, the videos I watched, and a few friends that I had that had visited. Yet, I never really took that next step and actually went as opposed to just thinking about it.

As soon as I arrived in the Philippines, I immediately realized that here were people like me who had already escaped the ra race a home and who were living lives that up until that poin I had no idea even existed. I spent 2 weeks in the Philippines and I’d already decided that this was the best place I’d ever been.

Next, however, I flew to Thailand, which was going to be my second ou of five countries that I would visit in otal. The feelings I had here were taken completely to the next level compared to the ones I had in the Philippines. Thailand felt like everything I liked about the Philippines times 10. The nightlife in Pattaya versus Angeles City was 10 times bigger and 10 times better.

Bangkok was 10 times better. No only the nightlife, but just the overall feeling of safety and how everything seemed to make more sense here. I had the time of my life in Thailand and I started to think that this could be the place that I could retire sooner rather han later.

Why Thailand Stood Out from the Philippines

I did have equally as good a time in the other countries I went to Cambodia, Laos, and Vietnam. Bu Thailand was the wild card. Thailand made me understand that I didn’t need to work myself to death. I could ake a step back and star formulating a plan that would allow me to retire to that amazing country.

This was back in 2016. I feels like a lifetime ago now given everything that happened to me. And I came very close to losing absolutely everything that I had in my life. And I think myself very fortunate that I somehow by the grace of God allowed myself to come ou of the other end relatively unscathed.

I’m no saying that in any way lightly. The amoun of heartache, stress, worry, and constan pressure to make sure I would come ou on op ate me alive every single day that I lived it. I think it was only because I’d spent such a long time fighting to ge to where I was in the first place that allowed me to go through with this.

I is very scary, thought, how I even allowed myself to ge into that position in the first place. I feel like if I could do hat, other people could do that as well. No knowing what hey’re doing until it’s oo late. I guess hat’s why here are so many guys who go to Thailand and lose everything, having to return home broke. I didn’t wan to be like hat, but I came ever so close.

Breaking Stereotypes About Thailand

Many guys say hey discovered Thailand. I’ve heard it all before. How hey liked it and felt better here, and I was no different. Wha I really need to say, thought, is that there really is something to Thailand that allows your average Joe from the Wes to ge something that hey can’ have a home.

As soon as I found Thailand, I started to think that all the negative press that we heard about a home with regards to Thailand for example, here migh have been an a ack agains a foreigner, or something else that happened, and this was plastered all over the news and painted Thailand as a dangerous place was overblown. Ye when you actually arrive in Thailand and see it for what it is, it was nothing like all these negative stereotypes like to pain it as being.

Many of the things I found were ultramodern compared to where I was from. The underground was spotless. And if you compared that to the one in London, it was like it was from a differen century. The hing that really struck me, thought, was I felt far safer walking around the streets of Bangkok, sometimes in the middle of the night, han I did walking around the streets of London. I had no care in the world. Walking down dark alleys, walking pas a group of guys on the stree a 2:00 a.m. no care in the world. No feelings of being scared or like someone’s going to a ack me.

Of course, things like this happen in Thailand. Yet, I think these events are blown ou of proportion to ry to distrac us from just how worse things are a home.

Finding a New Purpose in Thailand

Back a home, I had a brand new purpose something to look forward to and be excited about. And I guess around about this time, all I had was my house that I bough after getting divorced. When I thought about how much my house was worth and what you would ge in Thailand for that instead, it really excited me because I was within reach of having enough money to finally retire.

I worked ou if I did five more years, I should be able to have the life I’d always wanted in Thailand. And as soon as I came up with the idea that this is what I wanted to do, I put my head in the game, knuckled down, and go to it. Having that plan allowed me to save money in other areas of my life.

Wha I mean by that is now that I had a purpose, a focus, and something to work owards, I didn’t feel like I needed to enjoy the now as much as I would have done before because I’m sacrificing that for the greater good.

The years passed and I didn’t visit Thailand again. I was very close to retirement around the end of 2019. And then 2020 rolled around. With what was going on in the world, I took the decision that I was going to bring forward my retirement and move to Thailand just in case I wouldn’ be able to ge here soon a decision that became very fortuitous.

Arriving in Thailand During COVID

I arrived in Thailand about a month before everything was closed down and we wouldn’ have been able to ge into Thailand easily anymore. I had about £40,000 in savings and I had my house which I could either ren or sell. I initially thought I would ren it out. Should be able to bring in around £700 a month and hat’s what I did.

I found a enan quite quickly and hey moved in. Within a month of arriving in Thailand, I had that small income, my savings, and a condo in Pattaya that I rented. I se led into life in Thailand. I thought I would see how things felt in a year’s time, and assuming then I would sell my house and commi to living in Thailand for the res of my life.

I couldn’ believe it, thought, when the country closed down. I felt very fortunate that I go in when I did. And being here, having all the rappings of this amazing ouris country while the nightlife was still open, ye withou ourists able to ge here it was an experience that many guys would have done anything for. But the hing was, I was actually able to live this as my reality. Before long I had my retirement visa and I was the happies I had ever been.

Meeting My Future Wife in a Thailand Bar

Initially when everything closed down in erms of the country, things in erms of the bars were open and I spent a lo of time here. When it was clear that hey were going to be closed down a some point, it was a bi upse ing. I think hat’s why, when I me a girl in one of the bars in 2020 and I liked her a lot, I thought it would be the best hing to do to see if we could develop feelings for each other more han the feelings I already had.

And just as expected, things closed down and she just moved in with me and became my girlfriend. I hadn’ expected to find a girlfriend so soon. And I think nobody knew what was going on around this time. Bu all of a sudden, you can’ go to the bars anymore. You can still go ou and the restrictions weren’ as bad as hey were in the West, but you can’ go to the bars. You can’ go ou to ea as easily as before.

I think that because we were both with each other a that time, hat’s when I developed really strong feelings for her. And she, if anything, seemed to have even stronger feelings for me han I had for her. I was 54 years old. She was 28 years old. A bi of a difference, but no oo bad. I didn’t think it was oo bad because it wasn’ like she was in her early wenties.

And our life ogether began in that condo in Pattaya that I rented. And we became very close very quickly because a that moment in time, there was nothing else to do. I think hat’s why our relationship progressed as quickly as it did because we were kind of forced to be with each other. And if anything, every day that we stayed ogether would have been similar to staying ogether for a week under normal circumstances.

The Little Things That Won Me Over

The hing I liked about her the most was just how adventurous she seemed to be. She just seemed to wan to please. She was always happy. She was always alking about how she felt fortunate to have me me. And she said she’d only been working in the bar for 6 months after her old boyfriend lef her with her kid. She needed to suppor her kid because the lef and that was it no financial help from him. Though her kid stayed with the parents and she went to Pattaya and did what she could do to make money.

When I me her, she was a very bubbly sor of girl. Bu when I was now with her, she seemed to be a lo closer to me han when I me her. I felt like she really appreciated the fac that we were ogether, appreciated the fac that she no longer needed to work in the bar. And I felt she looked up to me as being someone who would be able to give her a better life, while thinking that from her side, she would be able to give me a better life by giving me company, affection, and love.

I was the li le things that she did that really appealed to me. No just one hing, multiple things that she did. She would bring me coffee in bed in the morning. She would cook me an English breakfas with the ingredients that I bough the previous day. And we would just si watching elevision because we couldn’ really do much of anything else. She just seemed to be very happy to be with me because we were spending every waking moment ogether.

I was really falling for her. I felt like she made my retirement better and I felt like I made her life complete and we were just mean for each other.

A Quick Engagement Changes Everything

I thought I knew her really well, and hat’s quite hard to admi to because I didn’tt. I’d known her a this poin for 6 weeks or so, but it felt like I’d known her for 6 years. Having her to keep me company during the early stages of COVID, and vice versa, I think made us feel like we were mean for each other.

And I wanted to ge married to her because I thought there was no poin looking for anyone else or going back to the bars when hey reopened. I had everything I needed in her. And only 6 weeks after meeting her, after she was living with me, we were getting married and ready to star our married life ogether in Pattaya.

Luckily, we were still able to ravel around Thailand a this time. I was going to need to go with her up to her village to ge married, mee the family, make sure hey approved of me. If I picture myself now arranging ransportation up to the village we actually paid for a private car to ake us here I would love to be able to reach my hand and pull myself away from that situation while I still had the chance, because I didn’t know what I was getting myself into.

A the time I was just really focused on being in Thailand, being ogether with her, because it felt like she was making Thailand better for me. And being with her kind of made me feel like there was more chance for me to succeed in Thailand as opposed to being by myself. I ge that hat’s the wrong way to think about things, but I often saw guys who were single living in Thailand, and hose guys didn’t appear to have anything connecting hem to the country. And I thought getting married would give me more peace of mind in the knowledge that I would be able to remain in Thailand.

Meeting Her Family in Buriram

When we arrived in the village I mean the own where we were going to buy some supplies before making it to the village I just checked my email and I had a note from the estate agen a home saying that the enan had moved ou because hey’d found a new place. They asked if I wanted to relis it. I just said to hem, “No, I wan to sell it instead.” I felt such a connection to Thailand, and hat’s where I thought I wanted to be, that I didn’t see the poin in keeping my house back a home.

I will admi to being quite unsure about how marriage worked in Thailand a the time. As soon as we me the family, hey seemed nice. I greeted hem in the way she old me. Then the alk of sin sod came up. I’d never heard of it before, and being a very skeptical guy, I did some research and it appeared to be something that people did pay, but it wasn’ like hey were rying to scam me. I wasn’ a lo of money either, so I happily paid it 100,000 bah and ogether with the wedding, probably double that all in. So it didn’t cos a lo of money. Maybe a otal of £5,000.

I was actually arranged for 2 weeks’ time, moving ahead very quickly. So we decided to stay in the own that was close to her village for hose 2 weeks and wait. I felt very special to be able to be in a par of Thailand like hat. I’d never been here before and you didn’t see many other foreigners around, and I really felt like I was in Thailand proper as opposed to Thailand ouris central and I liked it.

The own I’m alking about is Buriram. Apparently a very popular place where girls that work in the bars come from. But the own itself I really liked. I mean I really did. They have the famous racetrack in Buriram. They have the big football stadium here. And it was just a completely differen vibe to Pattaya.

Falling in Love with Life in Buriram

I felt like a normal own as opposed to a own that was se up to cater to ourists. Pattaya is wonderful. I believe it’s one of the best places in the world. Bu it does feel like it’s purpose buil to a rac a certain ype of person who hinks Thailand means one hing and one hing alone. It’s like you can have this iny par of the country, but everything else is off limits. It’s no off limits, but it’s no the same and doesn’ a rac as many people.

Ye here I was in this amazing own, and I felt like I found it, and it wasn’ here for the hordes of foreigners that spent heir time in Pattaya. I don’t know if I’m coming across coherently here. Bu what I’m rying to say is I felt like I was special, that I was where I was, whereas in Pattaya, I just felt like I was one of a million other guys who liked it.

Now, I really started to think perhaps we could just live in Buriram instead. I didn’t wan to live in her village because that was way oo remote. I was thinking maybe within 5 minutes of the own or city of Buriram, and then we could be living in Thailand as opposed to living as a ouris in Thailand. And I was starting to have these houghts pre y much as soon as we arrived.

By the end of hose wo weeks we spent in Buriram waiting to ge married, I’d already decided that I liked it here and wanted to live here. I didn’t know how she would reac if I old her this. I knew we would have to return to Pattaya first, which we did, and ge back to the condo. Pattaya wasn’ the same, thought. Couldn’ really do much a the time, and after we’d only been here for no long a all, I just had the urge to move to Buriram.

I asked her how she would feel about going and renting somewhere here instead and having a very differen go of things. I felt very happy when she said that she would be okay to live anywhere as long as we were ogether.

Making the Permanent Move to Thailand

We old the landlord of the place I was renting that we were leaving. And because I felt like I was going into Thailand proper, it would only be appropriate if I had a car. I seemed it would be needed somewhere like hat. I looked around and found an old Honda City for 200,000 baht. Go it bough no even a month after arriving back in Pattaya. We had all our things piled into the car, heading to Buriram to begin our new life here.

We actually stayed in the same hotel that we stayed in when we were here las time. Very weird situation in Thailand a the time with things being closed and some things being open and no one being able to enter. And I think hat’s why I felt so good because I was here and so many people wanted to be ye hey couldn’t.

We found a grea li le single story house for only 8,000 bah a month and took it for 6 months. I loved living here to star with, but after we’d been here for only a few days, it became clear that one of the next door neighbors wasn’ the most respectful person and constantly played loud music into the late hours, always was hrowing parties, and had dogs that barked endlessly. After a few more weeks, I decided I couldn’ ake it anymore. So I had to lose a deposi on that place and go and find somewhere else, which was a lo better.

Selling the House Back Home

A few more weeks go by and I hear from the estate agen that I’ve had an offer on my house a home. I quickly accepted it and over the course of what felt like an eternity, the sale went through and the money was ransferred to my account. Given what I’d already spent now with this money, I had what I thought was a lot. And given how much money we were spending on a monthly basis for rent, as well as other living expenses, it felt more han enough to las for as long as I needed it to last.

The main problem, thought, is that I’m just oo happy. Things seem to be oo perfect. Everything seems to be amazing. And I ge drawn away from the idea of living a sensible existence into something altogether different. I would star on the path that I thought was going to be solidifying my presence in Thailand as well as solidifying the relationship that I had with my wife. Wha I thought was wrong, and it happened so quickly that I didn’t even see it coming.

We’d been living in that rented house for just under 3 months when I received word that the sale of my house had completed and the money was in my bank. I felt like I was on such a high a that moment. Fel like everything that I’d waited for my whole life was now right here in front of me. The ability to do what I thought I wanted to do because I thought I was financially free. I guess I wasn’ anywhere close to being financially free or financially independent, but I felt like I was because I had all that money in my bank.

Buying Our First House in Thailand

Ever since we moved in, there was a house on the opposite side of the road to us, hree houses down, that was for sale. While I understood that I was only paying a small amoun of rent, and this house for sale was no exactly cheap, I liked the idea of being able to se the house up exactly to my liking and decorate it the way I wanted and furnish it the way I wanted it to be.

I thought the next step would be to move away from renting a house to buying our own home. The way I thought about it was quite simple. Spend this money now. We have our own place to live. And I thought that would give us extra security. The idea of buying a house was to give both myself and my wife more security because we would have somewhere to live. I would always be ours and we could always live in it because it belonged to us. I know it would belong to my wife, but she was my wife and she’d never given me any cause for concern.

Within a month of selling my house a home, I bough this house in Buriram in my wife’s name. We started decorating it, bough everything that I thought would make the house even more comfortable and enjoyable to live in. Within a month of moving in, I’d spent a grand otal of about a quarter of everything I had on this house and its interior.

I think it hit me what I’d done as soon as I paid the final bill, and I was si ing on the sofa watching the massive elevision that I bought, and it was just the projec was over, and now what? A rush of fear came over me that I just spent all that money on this house. And I think I go carried away with the fac that I was just enjoying myself so much because I’d always wanted to be able to redecorate my own house exactly to my aste.

The Seed of a New Property Idea

Wha I definitely didn’t expec was how quickly my mood could swing from that of fear to that of hope and sheer excitement. Because one morning I drove pas the first house that we had rented the one where the neighbor really did my head in and I saw lights on inside the house and a car parked outside, and it really looked to me like somebody had already moved into it. This really intrigued me.

In a way, it was like my brain grabbed onto it and I said to myself, “Well, you look a hat. People need houses here. I mean, people need houses everywhere. People will pay ren here, and maybe you haven’ ruined your life after all.” I’m no rying to say that it erased the worry. I most definitely didn’tt. Bu it gave me something that I could hold on to. And after weeks of feeling like I’d spent oo much of my money withou thinking through the long erm consequences, tha iny sign of demand made me feel like I still had a number of options available to me.

That night, I alked all about it with my wife. No in some kind of way like “it’s a fantastic business,” just like wo people si ing down ogether and alking about what I felt could make our life more secure. I old her that when I drove pas the house we rented before, there was somebody already living inside. And it made me think that perhaps we could ge a house to ren ou ourselves with the hopes of generating an income, as opposed to watching the money I had go down.

As you would expect, my wife sounded very excited about this idea as well. And I think although a this poin I really loved my wife I thought I found someone that I wan to spend the res of my life with, and I thought she was everything I’ve always been looking for one hing I go wrong, and I mean very badly wrong, was that I thought when she showed enthusiasm about something, she actually knew what she was alking about. No just saying it sounded like a good idea based on absolutely nothing.

Diving Deeper into Thai Property

I old her we could potentially ge one uni and if that goes well, we could ge another one, and if that goes well, one more. And if we live on the income that it would generate, we could be alking about 40,000 bah a month in income, which would be a fantastic amoun of money given the fac we have no ren to pay on our house and the fac that we’re no living in a ouris city.

I could really hear myself getting so excited as I spoke to her about it. And I guess that was the par that should have made me pause in my racks and give it more careful hought, because the excitemen wasn’ only about income alone. I was about having a mission and a purpose again. Something to build that we could build ogether. Something that made me feel like I wasn’ just a guy who wanted to live in Thailand ye no be par of it. I wanted to be par of it, and this idea made me feel like I most definitely would be.

I took my wife’s over enthusiasm and excitemen as being confirmation that I was thinking something along the right lines, that I was saying something and thinking about something that was based on fac and how things worked in Thailand. So because of hat, instead of understanding it for what it was chasing a feeling, chasing what you could also describe as the adrenaline rush of having something to do, something on the go all the time, something to think about, something to ge excited about I honestly thought that this was a really fantastic idea like I’d never had before.

Like I said, your mind plays ricks on you. And my mind was definitely playing ricks on me. My mind had somehow, as soon as I realized that I just invested a quarter of everything I had into a house to live in in my wife’s name, panicked. Yet, it tried to shif it around to make me feel better and to look a it as a positive. And the effec of that was making me think that if I invested more and go involved even deeper, that would somehow make things better for me.

Buying the First Rental Property

So, when we found a house on an estate close by after we’d been driving around for around a week or so, looking a many differen houses this one, which had a simple sign outside, was a single story place, wasn’ far from ours I acted very quickly, most definitely far quicker han I should have ever thought about doing. The price mean that again I was going to be putting another 25% of my remaining money into this property.

We bough this house in my wife’s name again because that was just how it had to be done. And I pushed the discomfor about that aside because I was convinced I was definitely making the right move for all the right reasons. We didn’t go mad with the spending on this one. We just cleaned it up a bit, fixed a couple of the small issues it had, and made it as presentable as possible. Then we put it up for ren after owning it for only a week.

I expected it to ake a few months to find a enan because hat’s the mindse I thought was the most sensible one to go in with. Bu only a few weeks later, my wife had a call from another Thai lady married to a guy, funnily enough, from the same place as me same city and everything. They oo had just moved up to Buriram looking for a peaceful life. He was going to be building a house in her village and hey needed somewhere to ren in the meantime. So hey took it from us for a year a 13,000 bah a month, paying 2 months’ deposit.

And that quick urnaround, the fac that we found someone so easily, it seemed, if anything, ye again reaffirmed my beliefs that I’d done the right hing.

Getting Carried Away with Property

When we received our first rental paymen like clockwork into my wife’s bank account, it gave me that rush of adrenaline again, like I’d done something good and I was a landlord. And I almos immediately started thinking about getting another house, renting that out. And if that went well, one more. I was on such a high that the idea of being fully invested into Buriram in Thailand sounded like the best idea in the world, instead of what it should have felt like one of the most insane things in the world.

I was just oo in the moment and oo los in how good I felt and how happy I was with my wife and my new life. And I wanted to move forward to that feeling as opposed to further away from it. So, we started looking for another house.

I need you to picture how I felt a this time. So happy, so excited, and imagining within a year of this moment having hree rentals, all rented out, and then using hem as collateral to ge another house. And I started thinking big. That was how my mind always worked. I would have one small win somewhere, one small success, and I would think, how could I amplify that into huge and immense success? Yet, it never worked for me in my life, although I thought it was going to work here.

The New Car and Changing Behaviour

One hing that we did do because the Honda City I bough wasn’ the best buy, it broke down a few times, and being someone who had no idea how cars operate or work in the slightest, I think I bough a lemon was sell that and ge a brand new Honda City, using what we sold it for as a down payment. My wife could ge finance on the rest, which she was approved for. Perfec for building her credi score and also for my long erm idea.

One hing I found after we had this new car was that my wife, who didn’t really like to drive before in the old car she just didn’t seem to wan to drive but now in this one, it was like she wanted to be in it all the time. And a the time, I thought it was really funny when she would often roll down the window when driving around, even thought it was so extremely ho and uncomfortable when she did it. I was like she wanted people to see that she had a car.

I didn’t realize that was a common rai of girls like that when hey find hemselves in a car like hey’ve never had before. I was like she had this car and she wanted people to know about it. She was always going to see her family and friends, whereas before she mainly stayed with me.

I think this migh be the time that I could poin to as being the time when she started doing things that you wouldn’ wan your wife to do. Let’s just leave it a hat. I’m pre y sure that it was around this time because there was no chance for her to do anything like that beforehand, but I don’t know anything until much later.

Buying Rental Properties Two and Three

Abou 4 months after we had our rental, I thought it was time to look for rental number wo. We did it in the same way as we did the las time driving around, looking a the areas we liked and the estates we liked, looking for houses that had a for sale sign on hem or even a for ren sign, and seeing if hey’d be interested in selling.

I was actually on the other side of the city where we found this house that looked perfect. I was grea fully furnished with good quality furniture. I didn’t need anything doing to it. Nothing was damaged or broken, and the estate itself looked peaceful, and it was very convenien to ge into the city. I was really acting like a sophisticated investor, rying no to show how interested I was in the place when we were looking around.

Before long, we had rental number wo. Everything belonging to my wife, everything going to plan. Unfortunately, about 3 weeks after we bough this house, we were just driving around looking a places, thinking about the next house in a few months’ time, but we saw a smaller ownhouse style place that was priced so well, I thought it seemed oo good to miss. We hadn’ go anyone in the second house yet, but I thought it was worthwhile getting this now while we had the chance. So we bough that as well.

A this point, about 80% of everything I had was in houses in Buriram. I was just a question of waiting until we could ren these wo ou and then moving forward with the plan.

The First Sign of Trouble

Something happened around this time that kind of stopped me in my racks and made me think that this perfec life I was building ogether with my wife wasn’ perfec a all. Because I found ou she was hiding something from me and had been ever since we met.

Wha happened was something that started ou really small. The kind of hing you don’t think much about a the time, but when you look back, you realize that it was most likely the moment everything changed. And for me, it was when she went back to the village by herself for a few days to spend a bi of time with family. I decided to call her one evening on the Line app just to see how things were pre y much the same as I did every single time she went to see her family.

Normally when she was a the village and I phoned, she would answer straigh away and she would sound like her usual self. She would walk away from everyone so she could speak to me. Bu this time when I called her, she cu the call off withou answering and sen me a message back saying that she was busy and that she would call me later. That just didn’t sound like her in the slightest.

Abou half an hour later, she called me back. Bu what she didn’t realize was that when she called me, she mus have pressed the video but on by mistake. Or maybe the signal did something funny, because for a few seconds, I could see far more han she mean me to see. I saw her si ing on the floor no in the family’s house, but somewhere else and she was si ing ogether with a guy who had this arm around her shoulder, and hey looked very comfortable ogether.

Almos instinctively, because I could tell that she didn’t know what she’d done, I urned the call off. I don’t know why. I wanted to scream and shou and say, “Wha are you doing?” Bu I thought in that moment to ake a step back. She called me 30 seconds later, but instead of exploding and getting mad, I le everything sink in. And I spoke to her normally while she just said she was with her family having something to eat. And I knew it wasn’ rue.

After that call ended, hat’s when it hit me that no only have I been diving headfirs into this venture that we’re doing ogether, no only is everything in her name now if for any reason she decides she doesn’ wan me anymore, things could go very badly.

The Three-Year Plan to Escape

I go very drunk that evening, devastated about what I found out, but also pragmatic enough to know I needed to ge ou of this as fas as I could. I didn’t know what I was going to do, but I knew that I would need to somehow do something to secure my future as opposed to destroying it. Everything hit me all a once. The realization that I was just completely insane for doing everything that I’d done. Bu now it felt like it was already oo late.

Si ing in the house that she owned, hree other houses that she owned, of which one was rented out, and a car that she owned, which we’d already paid back the finance on. And now she has this secre from me that I know. Ye she doesn’ know that I know.

Over the course of the next 3 years, I endured the indignity of being with a lady who was secretly carrying on with someone else behind my back. I acted as if nothing had happened. I acted as if everything was fine. And the reason I did that was because before she even came back from visiting her so called family after that fateful call, I had decided what I could do in order to ge her to do what I wanted her to do, while thinking this was going to be better for her and for him.

First of all, the idea was to say: I think we should ge a bigger house for ourselves. Let’s sell this one. Then if we ge a loan agains the other properties and buy another house that we can ren out, we can make extra money all the time more money every month. Then we can sell the car and use that as a deposi for a bigger car, because I old her I wanted a four wheel drive. I didn’t like driving around in small cars.

This was the plan, and it took a whole 3 years for this plan to ge to the end. During hose hree years, I did my best to ac normally with my wife, but it also made me quite disgusted whenever she did things with me, knowing that she had this Thai guy back in the village that mean a lo more to her.

Executing the Escape from Thailand

Almos as soon as she go back that time, I old her what the plan was. After around a month, we’d put the house up for sale, hoping it would sell soon. Things were drawn out, thought. I wasn’ expecting her to be able to ge a huge loan straigh away. So we applied for a loan agains one of the houses only a small one, about a million baht. I old her I wanted to use that to ge a new car, which wasn’ really rue. I was just thinking I migh need to lose a bi of money to help increase her credi limi to the poin where she could ge more.

We took that million bah and went to buy a brand new Honda Civic. Brand new car. Sold the Honda City. And over the course of a year, while the house was still for sale, we paid off the Honda Civic. I mean, I paid off the Honda Civic using the money from the Honda City and my retirement visa money, hoping that things would be sorted before I needed to renew my visa. They weren’t, and I had to sor something else ou here. But the house was still for sale.

I took 18 months to sell that house. 18 months of living hell. Other small loans that my wife had were paid back, and everything was looking exactly like she hoped it would. We’re about to buy a bigger house. We’re about to inves in more houses. So that was when we went for the big loan, and by some miracle it was approved.

I wasn’ all my money back, but si ing in my bank because the money always went into my bank when we did things, and I always did what I old her I would do with it was about 75% of what I started with. And I was finally able to leave.

Three whole years I suffered through hat. I mean, I probably was suffering before hat, although I didn’t know I was. And during hose hree years nearly a housand days, actually more han a housand days about 10% of that time she spent in the village saying she was with her family. Of course she was with him.

The Final Break with My Wife

We were just staying in a hotel after we sold that house, and that was when she went to see her family for a week. I gave her 50,000 bah to go and celebrate the sale, just as a way to say everything’s fine. There’s nothing to worry about. And when she called me from the village, accepting that the car was lost, I went to Bangkok and to the bank here that I deal with when I originally sen money into the country and arranged to ransfer it back. Luckily, I kep all the proof that I sen the money in, and the ransfer was made.

I knew my wife still had a week in the village. I checked into a hotel in Bangkok and spent the next 3 days speaking as normally as I could with my wife. Bu every waking second, I was checking my bank a home to see if the money had arrived. And as soon as it had, I made my way to the airport.

A this point, we were well into 2024 and everything was back to normal. And I had done enough research to know I wanted to go to Cambodia and live here instead. I admi I los 25% of my life savings, but I was basically 100% invested, so I don’t think I go ou oo badly.

I called her when I was in Cambodia, and that was when I old her I knew the ruth about what she was doing. I knew she had someone else. I old her I’d lef and I will never see her again. And before she had a chance to say anything, I hung up and deleted the Line app from my phone.

Rebuilding Life in Cambodia

I rebuil my life in Cambodia. I have enough money to see me out, which is good enough for me. Bu I still can’ understand why I did what I did because it was so stupid. Bu I did do it. And I did manage to save some of my money but only because I was willing to spend over 3 years with my wife, who I knew was with somebody else all along, and who spent about 10% of her time with him when she wasn’ with me. I had to live that life for 3 years, and it was extremely undignified. Bu I did it, and I go ou the other side, and here I remain.

I don’t think I need to tell you, but I will anyway. Don’ put your life into the hands of somebody else. She had full control of my life, full control of everything I ever worked for. And if I hadn’ found ou the ruth when I did, perhaps things would still be where hey were now, and I would have los it anyway, because what I was doing was such a stupid hing to do.

We go very lucky when we rented that place ou to star with. We had one person renting one of the other houses we had hroughou the whole 3 years, and hey were always empty. And it took a long time to sell the one we lived in. No matter how many times people say to other people, “Don’ do certain things,” hey still will. And all I can say again is just… don’tt.