The Thai Massage Girl with a Tomboy Girlfriend: A Smart Escape
I met my Thai partner in my Western home country when I was 24. She was 30 and hot. She had a 13-year-old daughter from her previous Thai partner and she had moved abroad to work and send money home to support her parents and daughter who she said she had left with her parents. She was honest about all this from the start and she never asked me to support them.
I had Japanese, Indian, and Filipino girlfriends when I was younger but this was my first Thai girl and I was instantly hooked. Thai girls really know how to take care of a man.
The year after we had been together she took me to meet her family and travel around Thailand. I had been to the Philippines and Bali before but never Thailand which was completely different and I loved it. She took me to a ping pong show in Patpong and I couldn’t believe it. I had never seen anything like this before. We bought one of the girls a few drinks and after she darted the balloons above my head this girl had some skills. After the show we took her out for dinner and I thought my partner was going to ask her back to the hotel but that didn’t happen. We were still in the honeymoon period so it didn’t bother me.
We had a child together the following year, and unfortunately, before we could get back to Thailand to introduce the new grandchild her father passed away suddenly from a heart attack. He was a provider for my partner’s daughter and stepmother. My partner decided to sell their apartment and bring her daughter and stepmother to my home country and live with us. We had another child together and grandma would look after the kids while we worked.
Fast forward 30 years and I planned a trip to Thailand with some friends but I was solo. I was like a kid in a candy store. I had been to Thailand over a dozen times over the years with my family but never alone. Our first go-go bar was Baccara in Soi Cowboy and wow that is still my favorite bar ever. About two weeks later we went to Pattaya where I met a massage girl and took her back to my hotel for drinks. She was cute and a nice little thing and knew how to play the game. I broke the 3-day rule and we stayed together for 4 days, a big mistake as I started to fall for her.
We kept in touch through the Line app and she tried sinking her hooks in deeper but I was smarter than that. I did some investigations on social media and found her Facebook page where she had posted her business and everyday life, etc. I found out that she had a tomboy girlfriend living together. So I deleted the app and that was that.
Story #2 The Good Thai Girl Who Scammed a Dying Man
James was looking forward to the time when he could travel to Thailand to meet her in person. According to this girl, she was divorced and had two daughters. Her youngest daughter lived with the girl’s father and he wouldn’t share custody but she was tasked with driving her daughter to school and back each day. This and a few other reasons raised a red flag in my mind and I shared my suspicions with James which he dismissed as a figment of my imagination.
My son lived with me as he was disabled and he couldn’t work. He was waiting for Social Security to start paying him a monthly allowance so he could have enough money to go to Thailand. Even though James was debt free and I was paying for his living expenses he kept asking for money to pay for his various phantom charges and bills. I questioned James about this but he always had a plausible excuse. This was another red flag that something just wasn’t quite right. So where was the money going?
James had so many ailments that he was in and out of hospital for the past year and a half. Last month he became so sick that he was put on life support. He naturally wasn’t able to communicate with his girlfriend so I phoned her on Facebook and sent her a message informing her about James and the reason he couldn’t contact her. She wrote back saying how grateful she was that I had told her, expressed how sorry she was to hear the news and to tell James that she missed him terribly and loved him with all her heart.
I kept her up to date on James‘s condition every few days. This messaging continued for about a month each time telling me that she was so worried about James‘s condition and repeating that she loved him dearly. Recently James‘s health took a turn for the worse and I informed his girlfriend that James was in a serious condition and may not survive. She wrote back saying how sorry she was and that she was praying for his complete recovery.
My son passed away in September after going into hospice care where they removed his life support. I wrote to his girlfriend with the news and she appeared to be genuinely heartbroken. A day after her crocodile tears she messaged me saying her son got a girl pregnant and could I help her out with some money. I wrote back informing her that I knew she didn’t have a son and that she was scamming me and that I wouldn’t help her with money. She then started texting my daughter begging for money. Both my daughter and I immediately blocked her on Facebook.
Now I know my son was frequently asking for money so that he could support this money-grabbing scam artist. So you see it isn’t only the bar girls or the go go girls or the freelancers it is the so-called decent Thai girls that can also try to scam you for whatever they can get. Just use caution and look for any red flags that present themselves to you. You’ll get taken to the cleaners if you’re not careful.
Story #3 $177,000 Later: A Cautionary Tale of Love and Financial Ruin
I’ve just turned 57 and have been married for 32 years and together with my wife for a total of 38 years. We have three grown adult children and a granddaughter who is the light of our lives. I have worked for my current employer for over 30 years and during that time I also served in the reserve guard military for 23 years.
About 7 years ago my wife had her third affair and since then I refer to our living situation as “cohabiting peacefully.” Getting a divorce at the time was not as easy as some would think. We both have an extreme need to take care of our family even if we’re not necessarily together. I started planning my exit from the US at that time. While on a few active duty deployments in the military I traveled to a number of countries outside the US and I knew I might not stay here after retirement.
In January of 2020 I had scheduled a 14-day food tour in Vietnam for the following April. I needed a break from the normal grind of life both work and home. Unfortunately by March of 2020 the world changed and the tour was cancelled.
Fast forward to September of 2021 in the Phuket Sandbox I made my first trip to Thailand for 14 days. Vietnam was still having issues and they were not issuing tourist visas. The minute I stepped off the plane I was in love with Thailand. I stayed in a resort hotel that had 47 rooms but during my stay there were only 32 rooms occupied. It was crazy to see 70% to 80% of businesses closed, no alcohol sales in the bars or restaurants and most beaches with just a handful of people on them. I just stayed near my resort and took a few local tours. This trip did not include any girls.
The following September 2022 I returned to Thailand for my second trip for a month. This trip would include Bangkok Koh Samui Phuket and then on to Bangkok again.
On my fourth night in Bangkok I went to dinner with a social media group I was a member of. We met at a bar on Soi 8 and had dinner and drinks and later a few of us ended up going to Nana Plaza for one last drink at one of the clubs. One of my friends from the group was familiar with the management and the girls. I was introduced to a beautiful Thai girl and was instantly smitten. I’ll call her Pre. She was 37 years old but I would have thought 25 at the most. I’m not a huge drinker so in my intoxicated state I bar fined her for the rest of the night. This was the first time ever that I even thought of straying away from my wife.
Story #3 Continued: Bangkok, Koh Samui, and Phuket
We got a taxi and headed to my hotel. The aerobics were quite awkward for me as I have never strayed from my wife and even though it had been nearly 7 years that I’d been with a woman I couldn’t get it out of my head that I was cheating for the first time on my wife. Another issue was having to wear protection which I hadn’t had to do in some 37 years. Pre decided after a few hours she would go back to the bar to work but promised to return when done the first no no. We exchanged WhatsApp info and I went to sleep expecting her to wake up the next day and leave for Koh Samui.
To my surprise she did return but at around 4:00 a.m. Another short aerobic session and then we talked for a while. She spoke very good English and told me about how she had recently gotten divorced and had a 2-year-old daughter that the father, her ex, had taken back to Denmark to live with him and his mother. She showed me pictures and even showed me her passport for Italy as they had lived there for 3 years before the divorce. Her ex’s father was Italian and divorced from his mother who was from Denmark. I was head over heels at this point and I asked her to come with me for the rest of my trip mistake number two.
She declined but said she could in about a week. I later learned that it was because it was almost her monthly ladies’ days. We stayed in contact while I was on Koh Samui and then I bought her a plane ticket to Phuket to meet me when I left Samui. While on Koh Samui she sent me photos of her Thai passport ID card and email address so I could set her up for a flight to Phuket. While armed with this info I did a little research on social media. I found her social media page and everything she told me was true. There were quite a few years of photos posts and her travels. She had even posted photos of their marriage certificate from about 7 years prior and the divorce certificate which was only about 6 months before we met.
We had a wonderful time in Phuket and then back in Bangkok. I fell in love with her. After so many years with my wife her affairs and not having any physical contact with a woman in the past seven years until now I was in heaven. The day I left Bangkok to go back home seemed to be the worst day of my life. I did give Pre 30,000 baht on our last day. She had originally told me she would need 15K to come with me for the work she would miss. I paid her bar fine of 7,000 baht in which I actually went to the bar to do so.
We agreed to stay in contact and within days of getting home I told Pre I was coming back to retire in Thailand at the end of next year and I wanted to be with her. I told her I didn’t want her working in the bar. She told me that she wanted to be only with me and that no one had ever treated her as well as I did mistake number three. She said if she didn’t work in the bar she would need money for her living expenses and her family. I agreed to send her 35,000 baht per month mistake number four. That would be 15K for her family and 20K for her living expenses. She would always send me copies of all the bills to prove what she owed.
By the end of March of 2023 after only 6 months I had sent her approximately $177,000. I was now out of money that I could easily hide from my wife and had put about $5,000 US on a personal credit card. Many mistakes made during this time: her father’s truck had broken down her friend needed help getting back to Bangkok from Phuket where her boyfriend left her behind a friend in the hospital then had to pay the bills before she could leave she wanted to go back to school so she could get a better job she asked for help to go see her daughter over Christmas 150,000 baht but she never went because her visa to Denmark was denied and the visa agent took all the money she wanted to start a mushroom farm and so on and on it went.
Story #3 Final: The Non-Immigrant O Retirement Visa
I was so stupid. I told her I couldn’t do this anymore. I felt extreme guilt that I had given her false hope and had told her I would return and take care of her and eventually get her daughters back to Thailand. My heart was broken because I was so stupid and I cared so much for her. Our last conversation early April ’23 was painful but I couldn’t continue and we said goodbye.
The money I lost was to be for a non-immigrant O retirement visa requirement. I’ve only saved up about half of that money as I write this now. I might only be able to get a 6-month multiple-entry visa at this point but I should be able to get 9 months out of it with a few short trips out of Thailand and extensions every 60 days.
Story #4 Two Blind Dates in Old Thailand: When Non-Bar Girls Go Wrong
I’m not a person that hangs around in bars much so here is an old story about how I tried to find my Thai princess. This is a tale about trying to date non bar girls in Thailand. Is it any easier? This story takes place before the internet, email, and Facebook existed snail mail only.
Girl One I can’t remember her name. The first girl lived in Bangkok and I met her from an international singles magazine. The girl was in her mid-20s and I was mid-30s. We traded letters back and forth over a six-month period and we agreed to meet when I arrived in Thailand.
I landed and went to my hotel and called her. Previous experiences of talking to Thai people over the phone had not gone well so I was a little concerned what the result would be. Much to my surprise she spoke fairly good English and was nice to talk to. We made a date for the next afternoon at Central to see a movie. I was really looking forward to meeting her. She called me a few more times that night and the next day to hear my voice she said and we continued to have stimulating conversations that always ended with a positive vibe.
Remember this was pre-internet days. I had no idea about Thai culture and habits. I went to the meeting point at the cinema at the World Trade Center (as it was called back then) and waited. I was thinking to myself “Would she show up? What did she look like? How would we get along?”
Eventually a pleasant looking Thai girl arrived and introduced herself. She had a nice body a short haircut and wore a T-shirt and blue jeans my favorite 80s look. I said hello and shook her hand. What happened next stunned me and still shakes me to this day. Four tall Thai boys arrived on the scene, her friends from university apparently. I could have fallen over backwards. Talk about an awkward spot to be put in. I said “You want me to pay for all of them too?” to which she answered yes. The movies in Thailand are not expensive but just the principle. What was I going to be asked to pay for next?
As the saying goes if it doesn’t feel right get out. And that’s exactly what I did. I shook all the hands and bid farewell saying to her “I don’t think we are compatible” and I departed the shopping center as quickly as I could fearing that her escorts may follow me and beat me up. What a horrible position to be put in. I eventually arrived back at my hotel expecting a few more phone calls from her to explain the situation but received nothing. That was the end of her. After waiting 6 months to meet her it was over in the blink of an eye.
Story #4 Continued: Pun in the Chiang Mai Guesthouse
Each afternoon Pun and I spent time sitting outside the front door of the guesthouse chatting sometimes accompanied by a friend of hers who played guitar, or the passing motorbike taxi. Chiang Mai was a quiet little town back then with not a lot happening. Pun worked at the guesthouse during the day and at night she worked at the night market. She was very busy. I usually traveled to Thailand in April when it is very hot but the heat never bothered me at that age.
I asked Pun why the guesthouse was so quiet and she said I was the only guest they were going to shut the guesthouse for the hot season after I had left. I had mentioned to Pun that I was going to go and explore the countryside soon. She said she had the day off and if I got a car we could go together. Pun asked if she could bring some friends and I said “No problem.” Next day myself and four Thai girls loaded into the Suzuki and headed off into the wilderness. Remember these were all non bar girls and just normal Thai women very polite charming not asking for money and seeming to really enjoy the small things.
Pun seemed to have allergies to everything and could not handle much sun dirty air or swimming in natural streams. So it started to limit what we could do a bit but she was only a friend and it was only for one day so it did not really matter. Shortly after our Suzuki safari it was time for me to leave. I checked out of the guesthouse and left my backpack at the shop Pun worked at and looked around the night market before leaving on the overnight sleeper train back to Bangkok. Pun and I had said our goodbyes and thought nothing much of it. I enjoyed meeting Pun and enjoyed her friendship but was not attracted to her not at all. There was no physical contact at all and I had never even held her hand.
Pun said she would love to come and work in Australia. I asked her what qualifications she had and received the typical Thai answer of “I can do anything.” I mentioned to Pun that she may have a problem with her name in Australia. She said her real name was something else and a soothsayer had told her her name would be unlucky in Australia and she would get a new name if she ever visited there.
Story #4 Final: Pun, Chiang Mai, and a 3,000 Baht Request
At this stage I had never even heard of Pattaya and had never been there. That had changed by the next trip and I arrived in Chiang Mai with a bar girl as my companion. When I arrived in Chiang Mai the guesthouse was already closed for the hot season and I had to find another place to stay no problem there. I went to the night market to catch up with Pun. She was friendly to me but she looked my friend up and down very coldly. She asked me how we met and I told her we just met in Pattaya and let it go at that. I hired another Suzuki and we did another day trip to another location but one of the girls declined to come this time.
On the final day I had the same agreement with Pun that I would leave my bag at her shop until my train departed and we would meet up at the night market. When I arrived at her shop the shop was shut and there was no sign of Pun to be seen. With my lack of culture and being insensitive I had no idea she was majorly annoyed with me.
When I arrived home I sent her a letter to see if she was okay. Very quickly I received back an angry letter saying that if I wanted her forgiveness I would need to send her 3000 baht for a sinus operation. I believed her that the money was for an operation but I was not sure why I needed her forgiveness and I never responded to her. A few years later I received an email advising me that she had opened a Thai travel agency in Chiang Mai and if I was ever up there I should drop in. I have never been back to Chiang Mai. I hope she did well with the business.
Story #5 Overstaying by One Day: A Kind Officer and a Warning
I had an interesting experience with Thai immigration when I left after exceeding my 30-day visa-free period by one day.
I knew I wanted to spend at least 30 days in Thailand then possibly extend and stay a few extra weeks. I have traveled to Thailand before on a one-way ticket then purchased my onward leg once in Thailand. I never found arriving on a one-way ticket a problem from the Thais’ perspective. However it caused an irritation once at the European departure point where I was questioned by a non-Thai airline check-in staff about my onward intentions. I was using a ticket to get to Bangkok and was the return leg of a Bangkok Frankfurt return ticket but by using the leg back to Bangkok it would appear in Europe that I was going one way to Bangkok. This time around to avoid that possible irritation on leaving Europe I purchased a ticket from Bangkok to Australia. As it turned out there was no issue at check in.
I purchased my onward ticket out of Thailand to Australia for a 30-day stay in Thailand. However on arrival and looking at the entry stamp I realized the date chosen put me at 31 days. I thought it is not a problem as since COVID all Thai Airways tickets are fully changeable and I intend to change it and stay an extra 2 weeks. During my stay I went online to change my ticket from Bangkok to Australia before going to immigration to pay for an extra extension but I found it was not possible to change it as Thai Airways classed it as a special fare which couldn’t be rearranged. It was a case of use it or lose it.
So now I was in the situation that I had a ticket leaving Bangkok at 6:30 p.m. the day after my 30-day visa-free stay expired. I went to immigration in Phuket to apply and pay for an extension costing a few thousand baht simply to do the right thing and not overstay by a few hours. Phuket immigration told me not to worry just go to the airport and pay a 500 baht fine as it was not worth paying the higher extension fee and they assured me it would have no negative consequences for me.
Sure enough on my departure day at immigration check I was politely asked to follow the officer to a booth right down the end of the line. The officer in the other booth took my passport while his colleague explained the situation. The second officer inspected all the entry and exit stamps. I had a 500 baht note out in front of him and said “I have to pay you 500 baht as I overstayed a day to catch my flight. I intended to apply for an extension but my airline ticket cannot be modified so I can’t change it to go a day earlier and I can’t extend to stay in Thailand.”
The officer smiled and said “Mister you do not worry about it. You never overstayed before.” He put a stamp with some Thai writing in the passport initialed it and there was a number one written in it.
Story #6 Bonus: A Simple Scam and How to Avoid It
So I’m in Bangkok now and just last night got scammed so easily. I saw it coming but too late. I met a 37-year-old girl on Thai Friendly. I told her my location she said usual stuff etc. Long story short I was scammed by her so easily.
Basically she whisked me in a taxi to a Thai restaurant ordered everything you can think of plus red wine at 2,500 baht saying “I only drink that.” Chemistry was brilliant etc. I paid a big bill. And then she said “There is a show on in walking distance would you like it?” Claiming now she wanted to go. 5 minutes walk we were in dancers etc. She ordered a bottle of wine again red. They brought food as in snacks nothing much melon pineapple a little others. I noticed a Thai man sat on the same table as us. She said “He’s the manager.” Anyway after one bottle of wine she was given and all the right signals dancing etc. and eye contact. Time to leave around 12 a.m. The bill came. I was in shock 12,500 baht. Ridiculous.
She said “Don’t embarrass me I’ll lose face.” I was out of money so I had to go to an ATM so I thought anyway she’s coming to my hotel so you pay for what you get. No. Taxi driver came and I got in. She said her daughter was hungry at home and told the taxi driver to drop me off at the hotel. The Thai guy came outside with her changed civilian clothes obviously her boyfriend.
Can you see how it happened? I think the boyfriend bought a fake bill and just gave it to her for me to pay.
