Escaping Burnout Through Thailand
A little background on me. I’m in my 40s, never married, freshly out of a relationship and have no kids. I’ve never taken more than a one-week holiday in approximately 25 years of working in the corporate world. And I was completely burned out. I’ve always been a relatively healthy guy, but over the last couple of years, the stress and anxiety really began to take its toll on me, both mentally and physically. I took a leave of absence from work to get myself sorted out, but found myself only getting worse. I couldn’t even get myself out of the house to do simple tasks. On top of dealing with insomnia, I probably saw more doctors in the past year than I had in my entire life.
In addition to the stress from work, add the ridiculous cost of living in my city. A one-bedroom apartment starts at $3,000 a month. And an individual annual income of $104,000 qualifies as a low income. Then there were my parents nagging me about why I hadn’t settled down and given them grandchildren. I don’t know whether this was a midlife crisis or if I had simply reached my breaking point. I needed to do something. I needed to get out of the house. I needed to get out of the country.
However, apart from Mexico, I had never traveled outside the United States. I’d been watching videos of people traveling in South America and decided to explore my options. Initially, I decided it would be good to visit Colombia. Admittedly, a big reason was my attraction to Latina women, but I changed my mind at the last minute. I imagined I would be a prime target for scammers and thieves as I’d started out too much as an Asian man in a Latin American country and it would probably worsen my mental condition. I watched a few videos about Daang Vietnam and decided I’d head to Southeast Asia for a more relaxing trip. I booked a 30-hour round-trip flight from the US to Bangkok as it was a couple of hundred cheaper. I had no itinerary really, but plan to visit Vietnam, Thailand, and South Korea.
My first stay would be in Bangkok for 2 days, and depending on how things went, I’d extend my stay.
Arriving in Bangkok After Burnout
I arrived in Bangkok at around 5:00 a. m. I figured I’d be so tired from the flight that I’d take a nap at the airport or somewhere else before my 2 p. m. hotel check-in. However, the vibrant energy of Bangkok fueled me. After walking around the streets of Asoc, I found myself at what appeared to be a popular expat sports bar showing a World Cup game. I walked in, ordered some breakfast and a beer.
After the game was over, a rowdy American introduced himself to me. He had moved to Thailand over a decade earlier and had been loving every moment of it.
Bangkok Bars and a Thai Connection
While he was telling me his life story, a stunningly beautiful Thai woman walked in. She was dressed like a working professional and sat with another beautiful but older Thai woman. I assumed they must be the owners or at least part of the management. I had watched countless YouTube channels about Thailand to prepare myself, so I felt comfortable with my understanding of how things work there. But I would soon find out how unprepared I actually was. The American I was talking to nudged my elbow and asked, “What do you think of her? She’s drop deadad gorgeous, right? “ I agreed but excused myself to go to the toilet.
When I returned, I found the American talking to the beautiful woman. I laughed at myself and minded my own business. Then I heard her say, “I don’t like white guys. They’re all playboys. I like your friend. He’s cute. “ My new American friend laughed and exclaimed that he wasn’t a playboy. Even though his girlfriend had been sitting with him just minutes earlier before leaving for work, he excitedly waved me over to say hello to the beautiful woman and filled me in on what she had just said.
I had heard her but played dumb. She was acting very shy and embarrassed. Wow, this had all happened just hours after I arrived in Thailand. I couldn’t believe my luck. My new wingman excused himself to give us some privacy so we could get to know each other. We got talking, had some more beers, and played some pool. Towards the end, she burst my bubble by shily admitting that she was working at the bar. She was a freelancer, but she didn’t go with just anyone unless she actually liked the guy as well.
However, it would cost 5,000 bar. Welcome to Thailand. We exchanged contact information, but it was time for me to check into my hotel. I revisited the same bar several more times during my stay in Bangkok and had friendly conversations with her, but I never paid for her services. Later that night, I decided to check out the famous Soy Cowboy. Wow, there were some amazingly beautiful women, and the energy of the place meant that I felt no effects from jet lag or sleep deprivation. I checked out a few go-go bars, brought some women drinks, and enjoyed myself.
However, there was one occasion when, in hindsight, I’m certain I was scammed.
A Bangkok Tip Scam and Bar Fine
When I went to settle my bill, I dropped 2,000 Baht into the bin. That’s the cup where they hold your bills. The waitress said, “Wow, it’s exactly 2,000 Baht. How did you know? “ I then saw 2,000 Baht scribbled on the back of the bill. It had probably been 1,200 or 1,400 bar, but by then I was sleepdeprived and well over 12 beers in on my first flight. I left that go bar, but was suddenly pulled aside by a gorgeous woman from another bar. Looking back over my month in Thailand, she was by far the most beautiful woman I had encountered.
She had obviously undergone some cosmetic work and I had heard that the prettiest women were most likely to be ladyboys, but that was acceptable to politely ask a woman whether she was a lady boy. Apparently, I had heard wrong because when I asked her if she was a lady boy, she became extremely upset. I apologized and explained that I had heard on the internet that the most beautiful women in Thailand were likely to be ladyboys. She exclaimed that real women could be beautiful, too. Of course, I agreed. I ended up visiting the bar a couple more times during my stay, and one of the other women told me that the woman I had spoken to was in fact a lady boy. I never had the opportunity to confirm it for myself. I didn’t find anyone that night as the culture shock was honestly a bit much for me.
I’m used to American clubs where one woman at a time goes on stage and performs a couple of dances while others roam the room and pretend to be interested in getting to know you so they can sell you a private lap dance. Having a dozen women on stage bouncing around and putting on smiles, each with a number on her wrist and hoping to be picked felt too much like a meat market. The next night, I decided it was time to check out the infamous Nana Plaza. While walking past one of the go-go bars, a cute, petite woman dressed in normal clothing grabbed my arm and pulled me inside. We’ll call her Cindy. She was extremely shy and her English was basically non-existent. So, the girl’s manager did most of the talking. I didn’t even know she worked there because she wasn’t dressed like the other women.
She wore a jumper and jeans and I brought several rounds of drinks and had a lot of fun even though I had to use Google Translate and the girl’s manager to communicate with her. The girl’s manager said, “She likes you. Do you want to barfind her? It’s 1,000 Baht. “ After I declined, the girl’s manager quickly reduced it to 500 Baht and I would pay Cindy 2,000 Baht. However, when we got back to my hotel room, Cindy looked around with a disappointed expression and said she didn’t feel comfortable doing aerobics in there. Admittedly, it was the first hotel I had booked and it was quite inexpensive because I hadn’t planned to bring anyone back with me during my first two days in Bangkok. She took it upon herself to tidy my room and organize everything.
I was exhausted anyway and fell asleep cuddling her. She left early the following morning. Later that day, Cindy sent me a text saying she wanted to see me again. It was checkout day at the hotel, so I made sure to book somewhere a little nicer. I found what happened to be an incredible deal. A hotel near Nana Plaza that was supposedly normally 3,000 Baht, but had been reduced to only 750 Baht. I booked it for three nights. Boy, what a mistake that was.
A Hotel Near Nana Plaza
It would be the first and only time I checked into a hotel and almost immediately checked out again. I didn’t even care about losing the entire payment. It was that bad. The first red flag, as I would soon realize, was the type of customers in the lobby. Let’s just say they’re known for always wanting something for nothing and they don’t wear deodorant. I arrived at another hotel and while I was waiting to check in, there were two more of these people. They were arguing with the hotel staff about being fined 5,000 Baht for smoking in their room. They claimed they hadn’t been aware of the rule even though there were warning signs directly in front of them at the check-in counter, inside the lifts, and in the hotel rooms.
They also argued that because they were from another country, any guesses which one they should be punished. There were about four members of staff standing their ground and stating that they must pay or the police would be called. I eventually checked into my room. After unpacking and showering, I went downstairs about an hour later. These two guys were still arguing with the staff. I overheard the manager say that if he reduced the fine from 5,000 Baht to 2,000 Baht, would they be okay? But they still refused to pay. I didn’t stick around long enough to find out how it ended.
Cindy came over that night. She was much more pleased with the new hotel, but not before she scolded me for being so disorganized. She tidied my hotel room again. We had some light aerobics before falling asleep, and she left early again the following morning. I’d often heard about the 3-day rule, but I was hooked. I couldn’t explain why. Her English was terrible. She sometimes talked to herself in what sounded like gibberish and laughed to herself like a crazy woman, and she took hours to reply to messages.
On the third day, she said she really already missed me and wanted to see me. She suggested dinner. I thought, “You only live once, right? We made plans at around noon, but there was no response from her, and it was now 8:00 p. m. She had gone completely missing. I get sick of waiting for her, and I went to get dinner by myself. I figured a higher bidder must have come into the picture since most women in Bangkok wanted 4,000 Baht for short time, and I was giving her only 2,000 Baht.
I accepted it for what it was. I ended up having an absolute blast anyway. another bar where I was the only customer and everyone took turns playing pool with me. I wasn’t too bad at pool in those days. Cindy text me the following day wanting to meet up without even offering an apology or an explanation for ghosting me the night before. I simply replied, “I’m leaving Bangkok for Pattaya. I never heard from her again. ”
Arriving in Pattaya and Meeting Som
The following day, I arrived in Pattaya and I decided to check out the famous walking street. Oh my god, what a disappointment. I felt as though I was no longer in Thailand but in India. Every business, restaurant, and customer seemed to be anything but Thai. In fact, I couldn’t even find a Thai restaurant among the sea of Indian restaurants at Soy Cowboy. Beautiful Thai women grab you and try to draw you into their bars. But on Walking Street in Pattaya, Indian men shove laminated flyers advertising live aerobic shows at you. I instantly regretted leaving Bangkok.
There was a little light at the end of the tunnel, though. I walked past a small bar where a very cute Thai woman waved me over with a most beautiful smile. We’ll call her Som. I gladly took refuge in her bar and bought her drinks for keeping me company. I told her how disappointed I was with Pattaya and that I was already considering returning to Bangkok. She laughed and acknowledged that yes, many of the bars and clubs were now owned by Indians. I thanked her for keeping me company and gave her a trip and left for the next couple of days. I decided that perhaps I needed a break from all the drinking and shouldn’t do should do more tourist activities.
Pattaya’s Walking Street and the Pattaya Floating Market
I visited the sanctuary of truth, the most impressive place I’ve ever seen in my life. Pattaya, a floating market, and jumped on the beach. Later, I decided to stop at the bar on Walking Street where Som worked. She was there and greeted me excitedly. We had a couple of drinks and played some pool. Before leaving, we exchanged contact information. I didn’t think much of it because it didn’t appear to be a typical girly bar as the staff seemed to consist of only her and an older man and woman. Eventually, I discovered Soy 6, Soy Bal, Myth Night, and Tree Town.
Now, this was what I had expected from Pattaya. I had an absolute blast over the next two nights and was looking forward to extending my stay there. I met several beautiful and fun Thai women, but didn’t find anyone. I simply enjoyed drinking, listening to live music, playing pool, and buying the women drinks. Then one day, I received a text from Som asking, “What are your plans tonight? “ I told her I had been craving Korean barbecue, but it was too much food to eat alone and asked whether she would like to join me. She gladly accepted. We had a great time, and after dinner, we walked for a while before stopping at a bar where we ordered some drinks and played pool.
At the end of the night, she said something that burst my bubble slightly. If I wanted to see her again, she needed 2,000 Baht a day to cover her lost wages and 500 Baht for her bar fine. Fair enough. I had enjoyed myself and said I would like to see her again. It turned out to be the best decision of my trip up to that point. She had her own scooter and ended up becoming my personal tour guide. She helped me find cheap but decent hotels and took me to some of the most breathtaking restaurants and scenic areas. She always tried to stop me from spending excessively on food.
She even did my laundry for me. I really enjoyed every moment with her, not to mention the incredible aerobic sessions we had. A funny thing I noticed about most of the women working in the bars was that when they were asked how old they were, most of them answered 25, including Cindy from Bangkok, who quickly admitted that she was actually 32. Some would eventually admit their real age, but the girl’s managers advised them to say 25. So never gave me any dishonest answers. She told me the truth about her age, her child, her financial stable parents, her previous fang boyfriends, and her financial situation. However, she did mention that she had other family members who constantly needed to borrow money from her.
Returning to Bangkok From Vietnam
I spent every day of the following week with her but eventually decided to return to Bangkok as I planned to visit Vietnam next and had been waiting for my visa to be approved. We continued texting every day. I landed in Daang, Vietnam. Beautiful beach, beautiful women and delicious, inexpensive food. However, after my first night, I already wanted to return to Thailand. Vietnam was even more humid. Most of the tourists were families or couples, and the night life was practically non-existent. Simply crossing the road felt like I was taking my life into my hands.
Vehicles were sounding their horns every 2 minutes, and I didn’t finally fall asleep until 4:00 a. m. Vendors rode bicycles up and down the street using incredibly loud speakers to sell soup at 2:00 a. m. There were no friendly smiles like there had been in Thailand. Instead, I felt as though I was constantly in everybody’s way and needed to hurry up. My anxiety and insomnia returned. Luckily, I had booked only a one-way flight and two nights at the hotel.
Within hours of landing in Vietnam, I booked my return flight to Thailand. I decided to skip South Korea on this trip.
Pattaya Reunion and the Pool Game
I arrived back at Bangkok airport and took the bus straight to Pattaya. After checking into my hotel, I went straight to surprise S. She had the biggest smile, ran over and hugged me, then punched me on the shoulder and scolded me for not telling her that I was back in Thailand. We enjoyed the next few days together. There was an awkward moment when we were walking around a shopping center when she stopped to look at some gold jewelry. I thought to myself, “Uh-oh, here we go. She’s going to ask me to buy her a gift. “ I had already volunteered to pay for a few pieces of clothing and some makeup for her.
Luckily, she didn’t ask for any gold or anything else. truthfully eventually became bored. She didn’t enjoy drinking much and preferred to go to sleep early. I told her that I wanted a few days to myself to explore the night life. To my surprise, she took it well and didn’t put up a fight. She didn’t even send me a text afterwards.
Thailand Changes His Life
I spent the next few days exploring Pattaya and had even more stories to tell. But this one was already becoming too long. Let’s just say that every single night was memorable in its own unique way. With my month-long trip winding down, I felt that I had to say goodbye to Som in the same way that we had met. Admittedly, I also missed seeing her smile, having drinks at her bar and playing pool with her. After all, we had a score to settle. She was one of the few people, male or female, to have beat me at pool. I was slightly concerned that she might be upset with me because she had stopped communicating.
But she said she understood that I was there to have fun and didn’t want to hold me back. However, she had missed me and wished that I had visited her more often. I was pleasantly surprised by her lack of jealousy. She asked me how many women had stayed with me while I was alone. I’d heard told her and jokingly asked how many men had barfind her. Regardless of her answer, I wouldn’t have been jealous. It would be like paying an escort for her time and then becoming upset because she saw other clients on the days when you weren’t with her. I had no intention of retiring her or becoming her sponsor.
After a couple of drinks, I simply blurred out, “I’m heading to Bangkok tomorrow for my final couple of nights before my flight. Do you want to come with me? “ I was pleasantly surprised to see her smile and say yes without hesitation. We visited some temples, had an unexpectedly memorable night on Kson Road, explored shopping centers, and enjoyed some delicious final meals together. Most importantly, I was finally able to gain the advantage over her on our running pool scorecard. It was a truly memorable and perfect way to end my final few days in Thailand after spending a month there. We still message each other every day.
In the meantime, this trip to Thailand has been both the best and worst thing to happen to me. It was without doubt the best month of my life. I had been dealing with serious stress and anxiety for the previous couple of years. Often sleeping for only two or three hours a night and waking several times because of nightmares about work. I had flare-ups unlike anything I had experienced before. Throughout my adult life, I had relied on sleeping medications. From my first day in Thailand, I slept like a baby without taking any medication. My skin cleared up and I literally dreamed about Thailand every night.
My friends and family all noticed the positive effect traveling had on me. I finally felt ready to return to work. The universe had a funny way of working. Just days after returning home, I finally answered a call from one of my co-workers who had tried to contact me several times while I was in Thailand. I found out that my company had announced mass layoffs and would be eliminating my position. My co-workers were understandably panicking, but my immediate thought was, “This is the greatest news. Hopefully, with a decent severance payment, I’ll be back on holiday in Thailand sooner than I expected. “
Story 2 A First Night in Patpong
I went to Thailand in the early 90s after a guy at my work place site had told me with stories of his exploits. It was close to Christmas, but I managed to get a flight. I was arriving late and couldn’t wait to get started. So, I went straight to Patpong. I headed to a bar to watch the tennis show I’d heard so much about. Thinking Bangkok bars ran all night, I was surprised when everything shut down at 2:00 a. m. I had no hotel booking and decided to take a bar girl as she could organize a hotel room for us.
Naturally, I paid a premium for a trip around the block and ended up in a one-star hotel. This place was down some dark alley. The door was hollow core and the blankets were ex-military with a big hole in them. We kept each other warm, but I did not sleep well, expecting someone to push open the door at any moment. I survived the night and had to go to an ATM to withdraw some more currency as the bar, taxi, and hotel had cleaned me out. The girl came with me to collect her money, and then showed me to another hotel. I hit the sheets, slept until the afternoon, and then hit the bars again. It was like an adult Disneyland.
I had a good night’s sleep, and the following morning, I stepped outside to explore my surroundings. It wasn’t long before a scammer spotted his mark and approached me. He asked where I was from, then mentioned that his niece was going to Australia to work in a general hospital. Most hospitals I had heard of in Australia were named after royalty, a religion, or the suburb they were in, but whatever. We talked some more and he asked if she needed to take cash with her. I answered, “Give her a master card. It works all around the world. “ He asked more questions about kangaroos and crocodile dundee and made general conversation.
Then he asked if I would mind speaking to his sister to put her mind at ease about the safety of Australia. I agreed thinking he lived nearby, but he hailed a taxi and I, feeling committed, got in. We drove a fair distance and I tried to watch for landmarks so I could find my way back. We finally arrived at a dwelling behind some shops. There was a man there whom he introduced as his uncle. He asked about the whereabouts of his sister who had apparently just gone to the shops. He offered me some food and drink. The drink was an unopened bottle of Coke.
He then told me that he would go and find his sister. The uncle spoke about his job at a casino and told me about the terrible odds faced by the average punter. I agreed to humor him and then suggested that he could show me a way for us to win. I had no intention of trying it, but I humored him and he continued trying to teach me hand signals. Eventually, he found one I could remember. It was a gesture representing the jack. I wasn’t concerned as I had no intention of going to a casino. Then he said that sometimes an acquaintance visited and they gambled together.
The other man returned without the sister and then they said that a Mr. Supa, apparently the sultan of Brunai’s nephew, was coming. They said he was foolish, had too much money that we could relieve him of some of it. Coincidentally, Mr. Sapata suddenly appeared.
The Bangkok Bar and the Card Game
I got up to leave, but they said it was only a friendly game, and shoved 2,000 Baht into my pocket for me to play. Stupidly, I thought it would soon end when the money ran out. I played a few hands, winning some and losing some, and then Mr. Sapata wanted to play for one final hand. Through signals, I was led to believe that Supata had 20, I had an ace, and the dealer indicated that the next card was a 10, so I brought it. Then Supata upped the ante. I got caught up in the moment and put down 5,000 Baht of my own money. He raised the bet again, and I had no more cash, so the others said they would cover it.
Supata raised it again. He had an attaché case full of $100 bills. I had no expectation that I would be leaving with his money, but I continued using IOUs. We stopped when we had 60,000 in the pot. Supata then said that when you placed a bet in it, it should be in cash. The other men said that because it was Sunday, we would have to wait until the following day to go to the bank. The cards were sealed inside an envelope, placed in a box, and locked. I was given the key.
Sapata then said that because most of the cash in the box belonged to him, he should hold the key. He left with a key while the box remained with me, my new friends, who then started organizing how we were going to get $30,000 from my bank. I told them that it was their responsibility, too, and that I couldn’t get that kind of money. They said they would provide the difference after seeing how much I could get using my Mastercard. I said I didn’t have a Mastercard and then realized what all those innocent questions had been about. They said they could organize something and that I should return the following day to finish the game. I was relieved because I thought I was in some deep trouble. They put me into a taxi and told the driver to drop me off where they had found me.
The Bangkok Card Game Scam
I immediately returned to my hotel, packed my things, and planned to head to the airport and leave as soon as possible. I thought about it and realized that the scam relied on me returning with my cash when in reality I didn’t have the top card and would lose if I did. I kept a low profile for a couple of days and nothing happened. I know it seems naive of me not to have simply walked away before it started. And I was lucky that they were amateurs, but it’s funny how easily you can end up in these situations.
Story 3 The Nana Hotel and Nana Plaza
I’ve traveled to Thailand for the past four years. The first year, I randomly chose to stay at the Nana Hotel because of the low price and location, but I didn’t realize it was right in the middle of the action in Nana Plaza. I met a couple of older retired expats who stay there for months at a time. So every year when I’m in Bangkok, I’ll sit at the tables in front of the Nana Plaza Hotel to meet and chat with expats and friends. One day when I was going to the restroom in the main lobby, I saw hotel staff looking at the previous security footage on the cameras. I said to myself, “Oh, something went down last night. “ Later that day, sitting at the tables in front of the hotel with my friends, a guy of around 40 years old told me he got robbed last night. He said the woman he brought back last night stole 50,000 Baht from his safe while he was in the shower and it was the first day of his trip.
A Nana Hotel Safe Theft Warning
But it gets worse. Then one of the hotel staff, maybe a manager, says his new friend was a lady boy, not a woman. The poor guy insisted it was a woman. He said, “I should know. I slept with her last night. “ The hotel employee replied, “But I watched the security footage and I know it was a man. “ I tilted my head down, trying not to make eye contact with him to avoid this embarrassing moment. What a way to start a vacation.
But I’ve also noticed that many young Asian guys bring ladyboys to this hotel. And the fourth floor seems to be the floor that the hotel sends them to for the ladyboys from Nana Plaza. When I sit there at night, it’s a steady stream of them going in and out for short times with young Asian men. That’s it. That’s the end of the story.
