The Danger of Getting Attached to a Bar Girl

Once again, I packed my bags and headed back to Thailand, a place that had started to feel like a second home for me.

I was really hoping to relive that amazing moment I had with a woman working in nightlife, the last time I visited, just 6 months earlier.

Unfortunately I was one of them men that ended up getting a little too attached to a woman working in nightlife, despite all the warnings not to.

Up until that point, I had done good in Thailand picking up my heart at the airport when leaving.

Arriving in Bangkok Searching For The woman working in nightlife

My flight touched down in Bangkok, and the first thing I did was swap my money for Thai baht—the real money I’d need to start living the trip I’d been dreaming about every single day since I last left the Thailand.

I jumped into a taxi as soon as I could, dropped my bags off at the hotel, and as it was already evening, I headed straight to nana plaza.

Hoping to Find Ploy Again

I couldn’t stop thinking about whether I’d finally run into Ploy again after all this time.

Those short but amazing moments I shared with Ploy during my last trip did something to me.

No other woman working in nightlife had that effect on me during my last trips.

It’s hard to explain, but something about her just stuck with me.

After flying back home last time, I couldn’t stop thinking about how all I wanted was just one more night with Ploy.

That’s all that mattered to me anymore.

The problem is I never got her phone number or any way to contact her.

I didn’t even know if she’d still be there, or if I’d ever see her again, and we all know a lot can happen to a girl working there while we aren’t there.

Searching Nana Plaza for Ploy

I went to Nana Plaza and walked right to the bar where I last saw her.

I looked around, hoping she’d be there.

Some of the girls in there are absolutely stunning, but I only had one thing in mind, so I politely declined everyone as I made my way around the bar.

One of the girls caught my eye she looked familiar, like she remembered me from last time, she gave me a friendly smile and said hello in that easy way Thai girls do.”

Girls Everywhere

I remember that it was a friend of Ploy that I met last time I was here, she was a big flirt and loved winning drinks by playing games like most girls do.

I took a seat and got a drink, Just then, I heard someone call out my name.

When I turned, there she was Ploy, my beautiful Thai girl, standing right beside me.

We started talking right away just like the last trip, and played a few of those dice games they always have at the bar.

Then I pulled out my phone and shown her that I still had the photo from last trip of her wrapped in a towel in the hotel.

I told her that’s why I still had the photo, It was my only way to find her again since I never got her number last time.

I kept it with me the whole time just in case I got lucky and ran into her.

The Unique Feeling A Thai Girl Can Give You

While we’re sitting there talking and drinking together, it’s like nothing else exists. Just being with her takes me to a different place a feeling I only got with her and no other girl.

Maybe I don’t need to overthink it just being with Ploy makes me completely happy.

Her smile, that voice of hers, even how she moves around… Everything about her gets me.

I love every little thing.

Yes I am a bit of a sucker when it comes to romance, and maybe quite the idiot for having these feelings for a girl but ah well, it happens to the best of us.

Finally Fulfilling a Long-Held Desire

Finding Ploy again was only part of what I had in mind.

Last time we’d been together at my hotel, but we never actually got around to do anything together.

This time, I was determined to change that.

Don’t ask me why I just had to.

After a couple of hours, when we had finished our drinks, I asked ‘We go?‘ She gave me that smile of hers as if she had been waiting for me to ask and said ‘ok‘

We got back to my hotel and I dont think we got a wink of sleep the whole night, it was amazing and I had finally completed one of the tasks I had been thinking about for the past 6 months.

She lived with her children so she would never spend the night with me, but she would stay for as long as she could.

By 4am, it was time to say goodbye.

I walked her down, gave her a kiss and told her that I will see her again soon, she jumped in a taxi and off she went again.

Meeting a Thai Girl from Online

Before this trip, I’d been talking to a Thai girl online.

We’d hit it off, and I actually invited her to come stay with me in Pattaya.

Kind of crazy when I think about it now as anyone that has been to Pattaya knows you dont need to take a girl there.

Keep in mind, when I planned this trip, I wasn’t sure I’d ever see Ploy again.

And even if by some miracle I did find her, what were the odds she’d actually remember me? These girls dont stop meeting others just because you have gone home. Honestly, it seemed pretty unlikely I would see her again.

The Disappointing Trip to Pattaya

The next morning, I met the Thai girl I’d been talking to online.

We had a coffee in Bangkok, then caught a bus down to Pattaya together.

Funny how things work here I was traveling with someone new, when just yesterday I’d been with Ploy again after thinking I’d never see her.

That bus ride to Pattaya took about two hours and by the end of it, I already knew. There was zero spark between us. No romantic connection, no physical attraction… nothing. Sometimes you just know.

Comparing the New Girl to Ploy

For example, every time I tried to start a conversation with her, she would give me one word answers or end the conversation quick even though she spoke and understood English.

Looks wise, she was decent looking, not the best but still very attractive, but because I had been Ploy the night before.. It wasn’t even worth comparing them.

Don’t get me wrong she was a nice girl. It wasn’t about her at all. But coming straight from amazing Ploy to her, let’s just say that was a tough and maybe stupid choice on my part.

Even though I wasn’t feeling it with this new girl, I still wanted to do the right thing.

We all like to think we’re good guys, but the real test comes when you’re actually in that situation.

So I made a decision I’d make the best of it.

Maybe it wouldn’t be romantic, but at the very least, it would be an experience, maybe I’d even learn something about myself along the way.

Enjoying Pattaya, But Missing Ploy

The hotel was perfect, and I was loving everything about Pattaya the bar scene, the girls, the beach, even some crazy jet ski fun.

As for my Thai friend… well, I tried to be smooth about keeping things friendly.

No awkward moments, no hurt feelings at least that’s what I was going for.

I think after a couple of days with the new Thai girl, she realized that I wasn’t interested in her romantically, and she saw that this trip will just be like friends going out, and if nothing more then at least she got a free little holiday.Every free moment I had, my mind kept thinking back to Ploy.

Walking down Beach Road, sitting at a bar, chatting to the new girl all I could think was, ‘I wish Ploy was here right now.’ Pattaya was fun, but it just would have been a lot more fun with her.

Wednesday morning came around, and after a great breakfast, I was practically throwing my stuff into my bag.

Couldn’t wait to catch that first bus back to Bangkok. Pattaya had been fun, but my mind was made up.

Just being in the same city as Ploy again that alone made me feel better already. Like I was back where I was supposed to be.

Ending Things with the Online Girl

I was supposed to spend the rest of my Bangkok trip with the girl from online, but I had to be honest with her.

‘Look,‘ I said, ‘after spending most of my marriage feeling alone, then years more single after my divorce… I’ve just gotten too used to my own space. Being with someone constantly it’s harder for me than you’d think.‘

I told her it wasn’t about her that after just three days together, I was feeling drained. That part was true enough.

The rest yes, I lied.

I couldn’t just say ‘I feel zero attraction to you” doesn’t matter what you say really, either way, you are the bad guy.

In the end, she chose to leave, but I couldn’t keep pretending not when every part of me was screaming to get back to Ploy.

I think the new girl took it as well as she could and understood, however I never did hear from her again and she removed me from LINE where we had been speaking, ah well.

When A Thai Girl Is Sick…

I rushed back to Nana plaza once she left, only to get that bad feeling when Ploy wasn’t at her usual spot.

Her friend gave me that awkward smile ‘She’s not feeling well today, she called in sick.‘

They even called her right there in front of me, she said she’d taken some medicine and couldn’t come out.

Part of me wanted to believe it.

The other part knew this was Thailand ‘sick’ could mean anything from a real fever to not wanting to see someone, or already taken out someone else, either way, I was left standing there like an idiot.

At the time I did not know this, but I was told later by other friends, when a girl says her friend is “sick” it normally means that she has already been taken out by someone, just a little tip to know.

Spending Time With Other women working in nightlife

I was disappointed Ploy wasn’t there, but you know how it goes in these bars.

I ended up with the other women working in nightlife who worked there, the ones I’d gotten to know over drinks and dice games.

Eventually I ended up sitting next to Ploy friend that I had met on our previous trip, the big flirt, she was stunning and really knew how to work in the bar scene.

We flirted, played a few games, and I bought a couple rounds of drinks.

Not the night I’d hoped for, but not a total loss either.

Ploy’s friend kept playfully hinting that I should take her out instead half-joking, but you know how that game goes. I just laughed it off.

We both knew that wasn’t going to happen.

The Temptation of Ploy’s Friend

I think if I had never had met Ploy, I may just have taken her friend, the way she acted and flirted you could tell she was a professional at this game.

The whole night turned into her flirting with me and making advances while we kept drinking.

She had this wild energy about her the kind of girl who’d try her luck just for the fun of it. Gotta admit, her persistence was impressive

I said my goodbyes, left the bar and went back to my hotel alone.

Lying there, I realized something I was hooked on Ploy. Only Ploy. That scared me a bit since I have never gotten like that over a girl.

I had always been one of them guys that brushes off feelings, but if im turning down other girls just because of one specific girl then yes, I was in trouble.

The next day, I skipped the beers and went round Bangkok’s markets instead.

Had a great afternoon this city never gets old.

But every so often, my mind would drift back to Ploy.

I might have a real problem with my feelings here.

Returning to Nana Plaza One Last Time

That night, I just couldn’t help myself I had to go back to Nana plaza.

All I wanted was to see Ploy again. I might’ve showed up too early though the place was still empty, no girls around yet.

Then the door opened and in walked Sai, Ploys friend from last night.

Really, she was beautiful.

When she spotted me, her face lit up and she called out, ‘Hey, you!‘ like we were old friends.

Watching the Girls Get Ready

I sat there watching Sai get ready.

There’s something fascinating about how these girls do their makeup at the bar.

The amount of stuff they put on their face is crazy, face powder, eyeliner, eye shadow.

Then came the lip pencil, lipstick, finally mascara.

It’s like a whole ritual, every tiny detail matters.

The way they look after is amazing though, its no wonder a lot of LB’s are convincing.

Then I saw Ploy walk in. Just seeing her made me happy.

She looked beautiful as always even if she wasn’t made up yet, showing that smile I liked so much. It was good just to see her again.

Ploy walks straight over and gives me a kiss hello.

‘I need to do my makeup,‘ she says.

‘Okay, see you in an hour,‘ I reply.

She stops dead, gives me this look like I just insulted her mother, then bursts out laughing “You are crazy if you think it takes me an hour to get ready”

A Miscommunication Over Dinner

I sit down and play dice games while I enjoy watching Ploy attempt to improve on perfection.

All a waste of time but she seems so focused and intent on perfecting every detail of her beautiful face.

Finally she joins me.

My plan for the night was to take Ploy to dinner and then back to the Hotel.

I asked her if she would like to go to dinner and she replied ‘No’.

‘Oh ok’ I thought.

I was really disappointed but didn’t say anything, After a 17 year bad marriage I have heard the word ‘no’ enough for 10 lifetimes.

I actually thought her friend might of told her that I was flirting with her last night so Ploy was angry at me and did not want to come with me.

I told Ploy’s best friend I had asked Ploy if she wanted to go out to dinner and that she had said no.

She looked confused and turned to Ploy and had a discussion in Thai and then explained to me Ploy had misunderstood what I had asked.

Apparently she thought I asked her if she has already had dinner, so she said no.

The Final Night Together With A Thai Girl From The Bar

It was getting late so I turned to Ploy and said ‘We go?’ With a sweet smile she replies ‘ok’.

Ploy is a little reserved in public but when we are alone in the Hotel room she relaxes.

Although she will not allow me to keep the curtains in the room open, I try to reason with her we are 12 stories up and doubt anyone could see into the dimly lit room.

She will have none of it and the curtains are closed.

Afterwards we lay there together not saying much. Ploy asks ‘What time you leave tomorrow’ I tell her I leave at Midnight.

She suggests we have dinner together and she comes with me to the Airport to say goodbye.

I was a little surprised that was the first time she had actually suggested meeting up.

I thought she may have suggested it because of the misunderstanding about having dinner that night.

I said ok we have dinner, we have ‘foot massage’ and go to the airport.

A Memorable Last Evening

The following evening I get a call from Ploy saying she is in the Lobby.

She looked gorgeous in a pretty black dress which she promised me she would wear.

We had a great dinner and the foot massage was fun.

I will definitely put that on my list of things to do next visit.

At dinner I could tell she was a little sad that I would be leaving or maybe I was just hoping she was.

Promises and Goodbyes

We promised to keep in touch every day until I return for her again, she told me she heard all that before but I think I made it clear that my feelings for her are deeper than just a take out here and there.

We get to the Airport a little late and I hand my papers over to check in.

I knew straight away there’s something amiss.

The lady behind the counter was taking her time checking me in, looking at my ticket and talking on the phone to someone.

Finally the clerk informs me the flight is overbooked and asked if it would be possible for me to fly out tomorrow morning.

She tells me the Airline will put me up at the Airport hotel, arrange breakfast and transfers and fly me out Business Class the following morning.

I think she was waiting for me to kick off and complain because I had already booked, but inside I was bursting with excitement’.

One Last Night Together

I wasn’t ready to leave just yet, and a little bit more time with Ploy sounded perfect to me.

Attempting to contain my excitment I replied ‘Sounds great book it through’.

We get to the room to find we are booked into an Executive Suite and I don’t think I have ever seen a bigger bed.

I know Ploy cannot stay because she has a wedding to go to the following day and has to be at the hair salon at 7am.

It really was bad timing, I wish she could have stayed because the fun we could of had in that big room would have been unbelievable.

We had a little chat and a kiss, had our final hug but I noticed it was getting late so I gave her some money before she left, a Taxi home and walked her down to see her off safely home.

The Real Girl Outside The Bar

As we walked down the hallway I caught site of her in a mirror and said ‘God your beautiful’.

She replied with a sigh of disappointment and said ‘I know’ as if it was a cross she had to bear.

I looked at her and we both burst into laughter.

In the many, many intimate hours I had spent with my Ploy that was the first time she had let her guard down and I glimpsed the real her.

A confident, beautiful, cute, strong woman with a wonderful sense of humour.

The taxi pulled up I kissed Ploy one last time and watched her as the Taxi drove away.

All I know is I love how I feel when I am with her and I love the person I am when I am with her and she is the only woman that has ever made me to feel this way.

It has now been a month since I returned from Bangkok after my time with Ploy.

It takes a while for me to settle down after being in Bangkok, getting back into the routine of every day life.

The Reality of the Situation

I am always mindful of the situations men find themselves in with women and I don’t mean just Thai women but women in general.

I did get her cell number this time and ive sent a few text messages but I think her friend replies to me.

She has never sent me a text or contacted me to say hi.

I was a little disappointed that we couldn’t carry on our fling or whatever you want to call it, but I can’t say I am not surprised.

To her, I was just another tourist in her bar with a spending money, im sure she has met plenty more like me in the month that I have been gone.

Avoiding Further Attachment With Thai Girls

Deep down I knew nothing could happen between me and her because of what she does for work, but to be honest, I didn’t really want anything to happen, I didn’t want to get more attached than I already had.

I think men like me that are looking for a Thai woman to be with are easy targets for women working in nightlife because we are wearing our heart on our sleeves.

Luckily for me, its not really a nightmare of a story, I didn’t lose money and I had a great time, so its no problem for me, I got out of there just in time.

I think if I never went to Pattaya that trip and spent the whole time with Ploy, then I could have potentially developed more feelings and spent a lot more money than I did.

Moving On from Ploy

Nevertheless, it was a good experience for me, and I know now how all the guys feel that catch feelings for a girl.

Its a great feeling but also very worrying.

I have decided I am not going to be with Ploy again.

I am 54 it would be nice to meet a Thai woman to be with but I think that’s just a stupid dream.

I think I will do this last stretch alone so it is time for me to hit the nightlife bars and have some fun.