Thailand Scams Love Lessons
The first time I came to Pattaya was in February 2019 for a 10 day holiday. I met a girl called Om. Back home we kept in touch on Messenger. She dreamed of going to Jomtien but had never got the chance. I said ‘As it’s your birthday present I’ll take you to Jomtien.’ She was very happy.
In October I came to Thailand for a month. We met in Bangkok. After three days we took the train to Hua Hin this train ride was an experience; it was like Europe in the sixties. After ten days we went by boat to Pattaya. This girl was not as kind as she seemed at first. She often argued for no reason. She wanted money and didn’t want to give much back. ‘Okay’ I thought ‘she’s not going to ruin my vacation. I’m still going to try and make the best of it.’ I really liked her despite her flaws. We went to visit her brother in Chonburi among other things and we had fun in Pattaya.
After returning home she started ignoring me acting cold. I had to wait a long time for her to answer me and so on. Then I decided that there is no point in wasting my time money and feelings on her. I started flirting with her roommate let’s call her Lek. She wasn’t that popular at the bar because she had a few extra pounds on her but she was perfect for me.
In February 2020 I bought a plane ticket and I booked a hotel room but then the pandemic came along Thailand closed its border and the bar closed. Fortunately I got the money back through visa travel insurance. Om and Lek became unemployed so I provided for the two girls. I paid for their room and food. Lek said she doesn’t like life in Pattaya and she longs for a normal life like anyone else does.
‘Okay’ I said. ‘What do you want to do?’
‘I want to sell food in my home village near Prakhon Chai’ she said.
Food Shop and COVID Trouble
I bought the equipment stove plates chairs and tables and so on for 50000 Baht. She started selling food and made good money. Then COVID came to the village. Many people became sick unemployed and scared. Prices went up sharply. She had to close the shop. She was scared what will the future look like for her? She has no children who will take care of her? I said ‘Don’t panic. This will pass. Everything will be fine again. In the meantime I’ll take care of you.’
Everything was fine between us. We talked and joked on Messenger every day. I’m not stupid I’m twice her age. I know what it means when she says she loves me but she also said she respects me. It felt good to hear that at least.
In February 2022 she said she is going to the temple for two weeks for their regular religious program as most Thais do. ‘I want to talk to you every day but you’re not allowed to use a mobile phone in the temple.’
‘Okay’ I said. ‘Do what you have to do. I miss you already. I’ll see you in two weeks’ time.’
After two weeks I called her but got no answer. I called for a month with no success. She was not active on Facebook. I was very worried I didn’t know anything. I asked her sister and her friends no one knew anything or at least they didn’t want to tell me. After a month I saw that she was on Messenger again. She saw my message but she didn’t want to reply. She also removed me from her friends list. I tried to be friends with her again I thought ‘What has gone wrong?’ but then she blocked me. I did not understand anything. How can she treat me like that after all I did for her?
I understand if she became religious in a temple or found somebody else but I don’t understand why she just doesn’t have the guts to tell me face to face. I was very worried I thought something terrible had happened to her. If I knew the reason then it would be easier to move on. Now I feel bad. I don’t get an answer from anyone from her sister or her friends. I saw a picture of her on her sister’s Facebook so I know she’s at home.
Family Costs and a Dream House
The whole family adventure cost me 400000 Baht. She dreamed of a house of her own where she could live in peace because her sisters and brothers quarreled a lot. I was ready to buy the house and have a few nice years with her before I get too old to travel. I want to say that I’m youthful no one thinks I am 70 years old. I don’t cry about the money I spent on her family. For example I bought a plastic swimming pool for her nieces so they can enjoy the summer and cool off in the heat.
Lek wasn’t after my money. She wasn’t a gold digger no sick buffaloes or other scams. She was always grateful. I remember once looking over at her and asking her what was wrong I must have asked her ten times ‘What is wrong?’ Finally she answered. She told me that 5000 Baht is needed in addition to the usual monthly support. I must say I gave her the money and she continued to be loving towards me. We had a lot of fun on Messenger if you know what I mean. Therefore what happened is unimaginable. Why doesn’t she tell me anything?
I don’t want to hurt anybody but they can fool us lie to us deceive us exploit us and we can’t say anything because then they lose face. It was now June and I was impatient. For a month I met Om at the bar but she refused to talk to me. She thinks she is very clever. Everything I gave and did for Lek it could have been for her if she had been a little kinder to me. I met a nice girl I was with her all the time she was great but I couldn’t enjoy her company 100% because this sad story kept haunting me. I wanted to go to Buriram and confront Lek but I realized it was a bad idea.
I’m looking forward to January when I plan to go and see my new girl again.
My friend came to Pattaya on the 1st of July for a month’s vacation. On the aircraft he fell and injured his knee he wasn’t drunk; he never drinks. At the airport in Bangkok he fell again and injured the other knee. He ended up in the hospital in Pattaya where it was found that he tested positive for COVID. I was not allowed to visit him because of the quarantine. He had surgery on one of his knees and will be flown home for the second surgery. What a holiday. Luckily he had travel insurance otherwise he would have been ruined twice.
Story Two A Tale of Two Scams and a Japanese Lesson
It is hard to know where to start so I guess somewhere near the beginning would be a good idea. I’m a 60 year old man from New Zealand and lived in Asia for over 10 years which gave me easy access to travel. I have lost count of how many trips I have been on but I guess I would say 60 as I like to go three times a year. Thailand was my destination of choice for many years until I branched out to Cambodia China Vietnam Japan and the Philippines.
I must say I have not grown tired of my travels both with friends and on solo journeys and have already traveled to Cambodia once this year and will be taking some friends to Thailand this coming December. My first visit to Thailand was back in 1988. Boy has the old girl changed. I would have to say in all my trips I can’t even think of one I wish I didn’t go on even though I did experience some adventures that I wish I could have avoided but for the most part I love them all. I don’t smoke do drugs nor drink never have but I don’t consider myself boring at all and try not to judge those who do partake. This is important as I was fully responsible for every action I made over the time spent there and I do like attractive women.
Going back to 1988 a Japanese friend of mine who was a record producer had gotten work producing some local acts in Bangkok. We had worked together before and he contacted me asking if I wanted to fly over and do some co writing with him. I jumped at the chance. He had already been there a few months and was well established. As much as I still have a soft spot for Thailand and especially Bangkok I know you have heard it before but it just isn’t the same. Well not for me anyway.
My friend put me up at the Malaysia Hotel which incredibly is still operating and has done so since hosting all the Marines in the 1960s. I used to stay there all the time during the first five years of traveling to Bangkok. If that hotel could talk it would have its own Netflix series.
I was so raw at the game. I remember catching a taxi from the airport to the hotel which should have been 50 or 60 Baht and when I went to pay I was very confused at this new currency so I held up a bunch of different denominations and I later realized he had taken two 500 Baht notes from me and took off in a real hurry. Taxi driver 1 newbie tourist 0.
As I had a few days to spare before hooking up with my friend I went exploring by myself. I will recount one of the old school scams which was very common at the time but remember this was before the internet and there was no info about scams. You learned on the streets in real time.
The Robinsons Coffee Shop Scam
I went into Robinson’s department store which was the biggest store at the time and while on the escalator a gentleman came up to me and asked me where I was from. I replied New Zealand and he asked which city. I told him. He shook my hand and asked me to enjoy my time in Thailand. I thought ‘What a friendly guy.’ 10 minutes later another guy stops me and asks in good English where I come from. Again I said New Zealand and he asked if he could buy me a coffee and ask me a few questions. I was not pressed for time and agreed. I followed him to the coffee shop and we ordered something to drink and some food.
He mentioned his sister was going to Auckland to study nursing and his mother was very worried about her leaving so he’d wanted to ask me a few questions and maybe alleviate some of his mother’s worries and concerns. Soon into the conversation he started telling me he was an ex English teacher and he had to stop teaching to look after his sick mother. He had little money and he just found out he had cancer blah blah blah. I brought the conversation back to the topic at hand as I started to suspect something was amiss. He pulled out a picture of a stunning girl saying this was his sister and did I want to meet her? I said sure and instantly my desires woke up from their slumber.
He then asked for money from me to pay for her bus fare from Udon Thani where she was currently staying. I asked how much and he mentioned some stupid amount which I knew sounded ridiculous. It was at that time that I realized I was being scammed. The guy who had originally stopped me and shook my hand simply passed on the info to the guy sitting across from me. I berated him for trying to rip me off and told him to pay for his coffee and food and piss off. He said he had no money on him and took off leaving me to pay. No real harm done it was a good experience and I continued on for the day. I was really enjoying myself.
Anyway the funny thing was another guy approached me a few hours later on the street with the same setup. And two days later I was at McDonald’s when another came up and asked me which country I was from and I replied in Japanese which totally stuffed up his scam. My instincts were sharp and I was on my game at those times. There were so many scams on the streets and in the bars I would say more so than now as people are a little bit more educated thanks to online info. Lonely Planet did not really suffice in the scam department.
The Go Go Bar Incident
A few days later went by and I did some work with my friend in the studio. One night he took me out for dinner with a girl he was dating and she brought along a friend called Tick whom I fell for in a second even though I had no concept of what a ‘second’ was back then. Tick worked for an import company during the day and studied four nights a week after work. She was tall gentle charming exotic and stunning. Sign me up Cupid. We were an item from that point on.
I used to wait for her in Patpong as her college was down the next block and there was a small bar that showed boxing videos which I enjoyed watching. She would meet me at around 8 PM. One day I got there early and got enticed into a go go bar. Remember I was naive in the ways of the world at that time. The smooth operator applied his trade and invited me in for ‘just a look.’ It was still daylight outside and like a scene out of The Twilight Zone I was in a new reality. Beautiful mostly desperate leeches came to every limb I possessed.
I was thrilled at the attention but I only ordered one Coke for myself and one drink for whoever it was clinging onto my left arm while shaking off all the others and telling them to go back to the darkness from which they came as I could not handle such a hungry horde. I now had a concept of what an early Viking raiding party must have felt like.
After half an hour I asked for the bill and I went to leave as I had to meet Tick. I was expecting to pay about 60 to 80 Baht for the Cokes and the beer and to my astonishment a bill for around 500 Baht was presented. I knew I was being set up. I asked for an explanation and was told I bought drinks for all the girls and they thanked me very much. Of course I cried and got up to leave and smacked down 100 Baht on the counter. Two guys jumped in between me and the door.
One thing I haven’t mentioned was the fact that I had been training in martial arts almost all of my life and could handle myself. I consider myself to be very respectful but would not back down from a challenge. I didn’t realize how bad it could have turned out until later when I got to know the culture well. I told one guy to get out of the way and he put his hands on me to stop me and I threw him across one of the tables. The other seemed to realize I was being serious about my intentions. I pushed him aside and ran from the place tail between my legs heart pumping wildly.
I now know I should have handled it better but I had no idea at the time that a knife or a club could have been produced at any time and neighboring bouncers appear out of nowhere to crush the foreign threat.
Tick Starts Meeting Me at the Hotel
I met up with Tick and told her what had happened. She nearly had a heart attack and from that point on she would meet me at the hotel.
The Relationship That Wasnt Meant to Be
Tick and I got very serious and I would visit her from Japan where I was living at the time every three months or so. After around two years she wanted to get married. I was in no hurry as I was happy the way things were going. After much persuasion I agreed to consider it but I told her that every time we had been together I was basically on holidays living in a nice hotel going to nice dinners and so forth but it wasn’t a real life environment in which to truly judge the future merits of a relationship. I told her I wasn’t willing to move to Bangkok and if she wanted a future with me she would have to come and visit me in Japan first and see how we worked in a different setting. She was reluctant but agreed.
It took me quite some time a lot of time tap dancing to get her a visa as bringing a girl from Thailand to Japan at the time was not an easy thing to do. I was so excited to pick her up from the airport and show her a new culture and lifestyle. I thought she would love it. How wrong could I be? From the moment we finished embracing a new entity like something out of a Stephen King book started to take over the once lovely and charming girl I fell in love with. She complained about the cold the people the food etc. Within two days I was so glad I brought her over to get a better understanding of this side of her character. I had never seen this before.
Instead of the three week stay we had planned I cut her trip short and sent her home after just one week as I’m not much of an argumentative person and have low tolerance for this type of behavior.
I went back to see her a few months later and broke off the relationship. It just wasn’t going to work out. She needed her family around her. She loved her culture and didn’t want to compromise the person she was. It was really sad for both of us and I think about her often.
Story Three The Policeman and the Girl A Dangerous Intervention
I would like to say that at this time I had been coming to Thailand for six or seven years and had been in a relationship previously so I was not green to some of the ways of Thailand. That said I would like to share this story of being aware of where you are.
My story starts I was leaving the Central Festival mall and was walking along the sidewalk on the opposite side of the beach in Pattaya. As it was still early I was thinking of getting something to eat but was not as hungry as I had finished off a bucket of movie theater popcorn earlier. As I walked along the sidewalk in my own world I walked casually with no worries on my mind. This would soon change.
I continued to walk. It was within a few minutes of walking when I first heard it a man yelling a girl screaming and crying and then ‘smack.’ As it was getting dark I initially didn’t see where this was coming from but as I continued to walk I heard it again ‘smack.’ This time I could now see where it was coming from. It was across the road on the beach side. It was a thin sized guy who had a girl by the arm and this time it played out right in front of my face him screaming at her her crying and then him smacking her again. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing.
As I watched him smack her a second time I don’t know what angered me more him slapping her like this or people that walked past them like nothing was happening. I said to myself that if he slaps her again then I would cross the street and confront him. Sure enough he slaps her and then I made my way over to them. I got in his face and I asked him ‘Do you hit men like that?’ He said to me ‘Oh no sir it’s no problem.’ I was like ‘What the hell?’ I said to him that it would be a problem if he were to hit her again. And his response sent a chill down my spine. He responded by saying ‘It’s no problem but if you want I could make a problem for you now.’
Being that this was a thin Thai man that gave up at least 30 to 40 pounds to me I didn’t fear him as one man to another no. It was at this time that I realized that he was a Thai policeman who I believe would have no problem throwing me in jail for whatever reason he deemed necessary. As we stood face to face and the girl was crying there was another girl that apparently was her friend who was now reaching up to wrap her arm around my neck to pull me away as she said to me ‘It’s okay sir no it’s okay.’ As I turned to get her off me the first girl saw her chance to run off and run she did. The cop was now chasing after her and just like that it was over.
As I walked off an Asian man looked at me in the face and gave me a nod of approval. As I crossed back across the street now that I was back on the sidewalk and the adrenaline had subsided I took a quick look back to see if the cop would be coming after me. Luckily he was not he was more concerned with the girl but I still felt unease as I walked along to my hotel. And by the way I had completely forgotten about dinner.
A Dangerous Lesson With the Policeman
I assessed the situation and thought how stupid it was of me to get involved in someone else’s business in a foreign land. I could have gone to jail missed my flight back home and very likely lost my job if I didn’t return on time from vacation. I forgot to mention earlier that I’m an American. I have seen numerous times in American news stories where the knight in shining armor steps in to try and save the damsel in distress only to have it turn on him sometimes fatally. How could I have been so stupid? Had something happened to me that girl would not have cared and even if she did she wouldn’t have been able to help me get out of jail.
As I returned to my hotel room I sat and scolded myself for getting in such a potentially bad predicament. I was traveling alone and no one would have known what happened to me. Fortunately for me I guess the girl did save me by running off and diverting the policeman’s attention away from me.
Story Four The Motorcycle Accident A Costly Lesson
After coming to Thailand and having met my wife and getting married in Thailand we always paid for transportation. After a couple of years I decided I was comfortable enough so I bought a motorcycle. I had learned to ride while stationed in the Philippines but it had been longer than I thought so again it took me some time to become comfortable riding again but I did.
One day I was taking my wife to a furniture store to check on an order that hadn’t arrived when it should. My motorcycle was a fairly large one and on the way I noticed a motor scooter coming towards us on the shoulder and on the wrong side. I felt something was about to happen so I started to slow down. At the last minute the motor scooter suddenly veered across the road and in front of us. I literally cut his motor scooter in half but my motorcycle also went down. I ended up with a broken foot hand ribs concussion and multiple cuts and scrapes. My wife had a big black bruise from her cheek above her eye and was laying on the road unconscious. The driver of the motor scooter was drunk he got up and ran off without any injuries.
We were inside of a local hospital but after several minutes no ambulance had come and I was worried about my wife’s condition. A local who had stopped asked if I would like him to drive us to the hospital and I said yes. They loaded us in the back of a pickup and went straight to the hospital. At the emergency room they came out with a wheelchair and wanted to take me in first. I told them ‘Take my wife she is more injured than I am.’ In the emergency room I was on one table and my wife on another. After a few minutes my wife woke up and sat up and asked me what happened. I told her we had an accident. She laid back down but in about five minutes sat up again and again asked me what had happened.
She had sustained short term memory loss and couldn’t remember what she had been told.
After they had me patched up they told me she needed better care than they could provide and called for an ambulance to transfer her to another hospital in Bangkok. I rode with her in the ambulance and after she was admitted I went home then returned to the hospital where she was at the next morning. Hospital food always leaves something to be desired so I would go out to the market places every day and buy her foods that she wanted. Turns out she had a blood clot on the brain that needed to dissolve. She spent three days in intensive care but they were able to dissolve the blood clots so they told me I could take her home. I went to pay the bill thinking it was going to be a fortune and found out they only charged me $67 for the whole time she was in the hospital.
When I then went at home she had memory loss and I have a warped sense of humor. She would come up and tell me she had told me something and I would tell her she hadn’t then she couldn’t remember if she had or not. This went on for approximately six months with me taking every advantage of it. Then she came up one day and said she had told me something and I told her she hadn’t. She looked at me and said ‘Yes I did.’ She had gotten her memory back and as they say the honeymoon was over.
Buying a Ford Pickup After the Accident
After the accident she was too afraid to ride a motorcycle again and even though I would ride it I also didn’t feel comfortable. So I ordered a new Ford pickup. So if we have another accident we would have a lot better protection. There you go.
Story Five Thailand vs Vietnam A Comparative Guide
I lived in Thailand for around four years between 2014 to 2018 and have now been living in Vietnam for nearly three years. I wanted to offer my comparison between the two countries for any potential new visitors or for those who have ‘been there done that’ with Thailand and want to find an alternative Southeast Asia destination on future trips.
I lived in Bangkok and Pattaya and am now living in Ho Chi Minh City also known as Saigon. For the inexperienced and unseasoned traveler to Southeast Asia both countries can be a shock to the senses. However Vietnam is definitely more so. Vietnam is decades but decades behind Thailand in terms of infrastructure development. The clean streets and sky trains of Bangkok’s Sukhumvit Road are a distant dream in Saigon even in the city’s commercial hub of District 1. However it is definitely up and coming and the city of Saigon now has its fair share of gleaming skyscrapers and bright lights just like Bangkok.
I find it hard to believe anywhere could have more chaotic streets than Thailand that was until I came to Vietnam. The baht buses SUVs and brightly colored taxis have been replaced by an infinite flow of motorcycles that seem to spawn from every tiny little alleyway and side street 24/7. These bikes seem to have perfected the fine art of balancing everything from giant gas cylinders and water tanks to full size refrigerators on the back often strapped on as precariously as possible with a little more than duct tape. The bikes weave in and out between buses and giant trucks in what can only be described as organized chaos. There just seems to be so many more people in Vietnam than in Thailand out and about at all hours. Another difference is the honking of horns which is rarely heard in Thailand but is an almost constant din on the streets of Vietnam.
While Thailand is 70% cars Vietnam is 70% motorbikes. When I first arrived the traffic alone almost had me turning around in the taxi and getting the first flight back to Bangkok. Ho Chi Minh City feels reminiscent of Bangkok from decades past while Hanoi definitely gives off more of a Chinese style vibe it is less commercial and definitely more of a raw travel destination than Thailand. While it feels like every man and his dog has done the backpacker trail of Chiang Mai the resort of Phuket the full moon party or the bars of Walking Street Vietnam is significantly less touristy and the attitude definitely shows in the locals. While I encountered a lot of jaded attitudes from Thais towards farangs the Vietnamese seem to be far more genuine but less exposed to tourists generally. Both countries however have no shortage of scams so always be vigilant.
Vietnam is definitely more Asian and less Westernized than Thailand on the whole. Thailand is a lot more geared towards tourists especially Westerners while Vietnam is more authentic. The English ability among the locals is lower than Thailand and the travel infrastructure leaves a lot to be desired but a patient mind and Google Translate can bring an amazing travel experience. While both cultures have many similarities Vietnam is definitely more traditional than Thailand.
The cost of living is significantly less in Vietnam and your pound euro or dollar will definitely go further. You can rent a luxury apartment in Saigon for significantly less than other countries and even Thailand. While the funky smell of fish sauce dominates both countries’ cuisine Vietnam is a lot more noodle based and far less spicy. Curries are uncommon and noodle soups are the staple. Good bread and sandwiches are also readily available and at a cheap price no doubt a legacy of the French influence. While 7 Elevens do exist in Vietnam they are far less common and are far inferior to the ones ubiquitous to the streets of Thailand. The best convenience stores in Saigon are Family Mart Circle K and GS25.
Vietnam Nightlife and Dating Choices
Another point to bear in mind is that while naughty nightlife does exist in Vietnam it is generally on a far smaller scale and is harder to find than in Thailand.
In a nutshell if you’re looking for a beautiful kind hearted and family orientated wife I’d look no further than Vietnam. If you’re looking for as much fun as possible in a single man’s paradise I’d stick to Thailand.
