A First-Time Visitor’s Shocking Introduction to Patpong

It was 1990. I was 27 years old originally from the UK. I had been living in Australia for about 2 years and I had recently met a Philippine lady who I was very much in love with. I had decided to go back home to the UK on my own for a short holiday and I had to have a stopover in Bangkok for one night.

Now I wouldn’t say I was naive as I have been with a lot of English and Australian girls and was very confident chatting any girl up but I’d never been to Thailand before. All I knew about it was that it was humid and the song “One Night in Bangkok” and that was it.

So the way on the way to the hotel from the airport was even an eye opener. Traveling from the airport with the traffic and huge billboard signs and the smell of gas fumes I thought “I’m not sure about this place.” I arrived at this really posh hotel somewhere in Bangkok that didn’t smell of smoke. My expectations of Bangkok went up a notch I thought “This isn’t too bad.” The girls in the reception were really hot and dressed in nice long slits in their skirts showing their perfect legs.

It was morning when I arrived so after having a shower I decided to explore and I did explore. I don’t know where I went but I ended up near some river with shacks everywhere and what looked like homeless people. I remember walking over a footbridge and there were children sleeping on pieces of cardboard but no one begging for money which was strange. I ended up walking for a few more hours and didn’t know where I was but ended up in the slums. The smell of sewage was getting stronger so I doubled back to the hotel and had a shower and thought “What a dump Bangkok was.

By this time it was getting too late in the afternoon so I had something to eat in the hotel and ventured out. This time I went the other way and I saw a pub called something like King’s Pub or something and went in for a beer. It was basically full of drunken Australian expats. I asked them “What’s the deal with the strip clubs and are they safe?” They replied “Yes they are but stick to the ones that are named with royalty like King Queen etc.

Then I left and went down the road and ended up in Patpong. Wow all these market stands selling really good fake t shirts. I bought loads of them so I could give them to my friends back in the UK. I took all my shopping back to the hotel I was so excited. I went back out again for some more shopping but as I went back down the street there were what I thought were discos open playing great music. There were hot girls asking me to go in which I obliged. They were dancing in the middle of this bar on poles with numbers on. Every time I made eye contact with them they would smile at me then I would look away.

Patpong’s Bar Culture Confuses a First-Time Visitor

I noticed these other Westerners with the dancing girls all sat next to them except for me. I didn’t want to be unfaithful to my Philippine girlfriend in Australia so I thought I’m doing a pretty good job here. But it got to the point I felt like a leper so I decided to leave. Next thing I saw a bar advertising “ping pong shows.” I had no idea what that was about and as I enjoyed table tennis I thought I would take a look.

Soon as I walked into a pretty large venue with a stage these girls came over to me and asked me if I was alone. I just said “No I’m with him” as there was an Indian guy about my age sat there in this dark corner with a drink. I sat next to him and asked him if he didn’t mind me sitting there as I had not a clue what was going on. He obliged and told me what was going on. To say I was shocked what they do with ping pong balls was an understatement.

There was an older Western guy in the other corner who had about four girls sat with him cuddling up and massaging his ego. My new friend asked what did I think of the girls. I said “A bit of all right.” He then told me they were men. I said “What like drag queens?” He said “No ladyboys.” I had never heard of the phrase. I said “How can you tell?” He said “It’s not the Adam’s apple it’s the size of their hands.” That was new to me.

This girl well I think it was a girl came over and did a rude thing with her fist closed and kept moving it up and down near her mouth asking me if I want some of this. Honestly I couldn’t believe what was going on. Girls in my hometown of Manchester would never act like this. Then these girls came on stage lay on their back with their legs all over the place and I could hear whistling. I said to my new friend “That’s not coming from where I think it is is it?” He just smiled and said “You bet.” Honestly I was shocked with it all and I’m not a prude or anything but man I couldn’t handle it.

I mean the internet wasn’t around even if it was I still would have not had enough research to know what was going on. Looking back I suppose I was very naive back then and it almost seems silly but if you arrive in Bangkok for the first time on your own it can be quite an eye opener.

A Soldier Travels from a War Zone to Thailand

I thought I would tell you about my first time in Thailand. You are correct Thailand has an enchanting effect on us first timers and leaves an indelible impression.

In 2009 I was serving with the US Army in Afghanistan. It was my first tour of duty out of four and it would prove to be my most dangerous and harrowing one. At that time we received a 2 week leave for rest and relaxation during the tour of duty. Most soldiers opt to go home; however the military would give you an airline ticket anywhere you wish to go in the world. So as a single guy with no significant obligations back in the States a fellow soldier and I opted for Thailand.

I did what little research I could do from a war zone back when the internet was still maturing. I created a decent itinerary for our trip. Let me tell you going from a severely conservative Muslim war torn country to a peaceful Buddhist country is a stark contrast to say the least.

We navigated our way to the hotel and immediately found some alcohol at the 7 Eleven down the street. Needless to say we had much pent up stress and frustrations to let loose. My friend purchased a bottle of American whiskey and I got what I was to learn is a favorite in Thailand Johnny Walker Black. We finished those bottles poolside that evening before making our way out to Soi Cowboy. The night was blurry but eye opening.

We wandered down the soi taking in the amazing lights and frenetic activity. We suddenly came upon an elephant and couldn’t believe it. However that was child’s play. We went into a bar that had lots of neon lights inside and was crowded. Now for naive Westerners who had never been to Thailand we were amazed by the liberal activities. We were sitting in the middle of the bar. We looked over and there was a guy at the end of the bar head back and in ecstasy and the back of a woman’s head bobbing up and down in front of where his waist was. We thought we were in an alternative universe.

We made it to some other bars and at the end of the night we found ourselves in our hotel room with nice Thai ladies who gave us aerobic sessions. My lady was clearly new to the scene because she did not speak a bit of English and apparently the night before I was so drunk that speaking was optional.

Bangkok and Phuket Extend the Soldier’s Thailand Adventure

We continued to tour and enjoy Bangkok and later found ourselves in Phuket. Phuket was definitely more expensive even back then. One night we found ourselves talking to two Swedish girls. It turned out to be a good night with some skinny dipping and water wrestling in the ocean right in front of the main boulevard. The one thing that most Thais have a hard time competing with is a nice large Nordic bosom.

That being said the women of Thailand were so much more down to earth approachable feminine and eager to please. After much touring scuba diving etc. we found ourselves in Bangkok on the eve of our return to the war zone. I remember just walking through an area of establishments late at night and a girl who was cleaning up and closing down the shop called to me. She was young and cute and so nice. I stopped and talked. Next thing I know we are doing aerobics in my hotel room. It was awesome.

I didn’t think it was a pay for play situation. However as she was leaving and she was very shy and timid in asking she did ask for some money. In those days the running joke I heard everywhere was “no money no honey.” Well that is true in every country I’ve ever lived it just may not be so clearly agreed upon upfront and a divorce court may decide the fair market value of the trade.

Very early the next morning my friend and I found ourselves on the way to the airport. This was after the new subway to the airport had just been opened and we used BTS and subway to go to the airport and save some dollars. Once we got to our gates and were waiting the picture of us two had to be so depressing. I was reeling inside the thought of going back to Afghanistan after such a relaxing and wonderful experience in such a laid back and peaceful country was horrifying.

One thing to know it is likely that one would have much better time of things in Thailand without bringing a friend. My buddy limited my overall experience on that trip. He hated rice Asian food Asian women he did not mention this to me prior. This limited my exploration of Thai food and most importantly Thai ladies.

That trip left me with fond memories. I swore I would return and finally in just a few short months (15 years later) I will finally arrive back in Thailand. One day a few short years I plan to retire there.

An 180,000 Baht Demand Brings a Rude Awakening

At 28 years old I first arrived in Thailand in December 2018. It was my first trip with my two friends who had paid for me to go last minute as they had already booked up. Having just come out of a long term toxic relationship I fell on hard times. They could see that I was fed up with life and had no zest left in me. They wanted to show me the world was bigger than our hometown and there was plenty to live for.

The day came when we finally landed in Bangkok and headed into the Sukhumvit area. I didn’t know what to expect. I was thinking of white sandy beaches and clear blue water like the Google Images showed me when I researched it 2 days before our departure mind you those images were of Phuket Krabi and other islands. I was looking forward to having a real good time with my two friends but little did I know I would be spending 10 days in Pattaya.

I had heard the stories about the girls all looking for money and potentially a visa. I just laughed it off thinking surely they aren’t all like that maybe there is a good egg in there somewhere. Before leaving for Thailand people in my hometown asked me if I was off to find a Thai wife. The thought had crossed my mind as a friend back home has a Thai wife he married young at 21. He went on holiday after a failed relationship fell in love with the receptionist at the hotel he was staying in lovely woman. He brought her back to the UK and they have a little daughter now. His Thai wife does everything cooks cleans and takes care of all three of them. She never ever complains about the work which unfortunately I cannot say about most Western women.

Upon arriving in Sukhumvit we checked into a hotel which is located on Soi 11. My friends have visited Thailand several times in the past so they knew to take me to Nana Plaza. Walking into Nana Plaza reminded me of the first time I walked into an arcade at the seaside when I was young. When I was a young boy the excitement of entering was the same pure excitement came over me as I looked around. The bustling nightlife was all around me. I’d never experienced anything like this in my life.

Welcome welcome hello handsome man where you go?” It made me laugh as I continued walking. I couldn’t understand it why all of these girls were smiling at me? Do they want a visa to come to my country like everybody back home said they would? I later discovered that this is a stigma as these girls are working here purely for money. Most of them love their own country and have no desire to leave.

Eventually one of my friends said “Right it’s time to let this guy see what goes on here” and they took me into my first go go bar. After my eyes had adjusted to the light I was amazed to see about a dozen beautiful girls dancing on a stage and wearing nothing more than bikinis. I was dreaming for a minute then realized it was all real.

Meeting A in a Bangkok Nightlife Venue

One of the girls left the stage and as she walked past me she said “Hello handsome man” and smiled. I was sitting chatting with my two friends. I said “I can’t believe this place this is crazy.” I couldn’t help thinking to myself “Why hadn’t I visited Thailand sooner? This place is great.” And the best thing about it was I was only 2 hours into a 10 day holiday.

I felt a tap on my shoulder. “Hello” said the gorgeous 5’2″ stunner with the brightest smile and the whitest teeth you could imagine. Her dark skin tone was a cherry on the cake for me. She was absolutely beautiful. How could I resist?

She told me her name was A and asked me where I came from to which I replied Scotland. A said “I like Scotland. You come holiday? How long you stay in Thailand? First time you come my country?” And very stupidly I said “Yes it’s my first time I visited Thailand.” A immediately comes out with “You want I show you around?” I thought “Why not? I wouldn’t mind going for a game of pool with her” and I had seen a bar with a pool table just outside Nana Plaza.

My friends hadn’t explained anything to me about how the bars worked or the bar fine system and I couldn’t really ask them at this point as they were both in full party mood with new friends of their own. I asked her “What time do you finish work?” She said “I work very late but I can leave the bar early if you pay for my bar fine.” I asked her how it works and how much it was. She explained it’s 5000 baht which would cover her salary and compensate the bar for losing her for the rest of the evening. Quickly working out the exchange rate in my head I worked out that it was peanuts really and I was on holiday for a good time so that was that. I paid the 5000 baht to go off and play some pool which I was looking forward to.

I got changed and we left the go go bar together. A and myself had a brilliant evening playing pool and getting smashed on shooters. We eventually ended up in my hotel together but I was too drunk for any aerobics but made up for it in the morning.

A fell asleep again and as I looked at her laying there I once again thought to myself “She’s absolutely stunning. She’s also a nice girl I enjoyed her company last night.” I thought to myself if she wants to hang around a while longer and go for some food with me I wouldn’t have a problem with that and I actually hoped that she wasn’t in a hurry to run off someplace else.

A Morning Bill Reveals the Cost of the Night

I was coming out of the shower when I heard a yawn. “Good morning tilac. Are you okay?” “I’m fine a little tender from all the shots but I’m okay” I said laughing. “I can’t remember getting back home.” A says “I bring you back ‘cuz you too much drunk.” I replied “What’s ‘mungk’?” “Drunk” she replied. I just laughed. I then said “Do you want to do something with me today?” She replied “A can do whatever you want to tilac but first you have to pay me 10000 baht.

I was confused. “10000 baht for what? You told me 5000 baht and I paid it to you last night.” A then said that wasn’t for me that was for the bar. You have to pay me 10000 baht for taking care of you last night. By this point she had raised her voice and was getting agitated. I tried to reason with her but she just wouldn’t have it. I gave her another 2000 baht and said “Look that’s 7000 baht I’ve given you in total that should be enough.” She then screams at me “No you have to give me 10000 baht or I’ll call my brother. He’s Thai Mafia.

Wow I thought “What have I got myself into here?” I shoved the 2000 baht into A’s hand and said “That’s all you’re getting. Call who you want.” At that point there was a knock at the door. It was my friend Gary. Gary said “Come on hurry up we have a taxi booked for Pattaya. It will be here in 10 minutes. I thought you’d be up and dressed already.” I said “No worries give me a minute. I’ll be right there.

A wasn’t done yet. She started picking up the hotel brochures and throwing them around the room and was shouting at me. “You go now I call my brother! You have to pay!” By this point I was getting stressed out and just wanted to leave. I just paid her the rest of what she was asking for and asked her to leave. The only thing I was thinking was how much had I given her in my own money and did I have enough left for the rest of my holiday?

As soon as she had the cash off me she changed back to how she was the night before. The next thing to come out of her mouth was totally unbelievable. She said “I don’t want to go I want to stay with you and take care.” I said “No I’m sorry that’s not possible. I’m leaving for Pattaya in 10 minutes with my two friends.” Then she says “Okay I come Pattaya with you. Take care of you 10 days. No?” I said “I’m not paying you again. I don’t have much money left only have money for holiday.” She says “It’s okay tilac. Two people can sleep together one room you buy me food. We okay. No problem.

Thinking about this offer and thinking maybe I can get to know her better I agreed she could join us. To cut a long story short we actually had a fantastic time in Pattaya together seeing the sights partying every night and getting drunk together. It was great fun. But now it was time to go home. I was sad. I had fallen for A and she was with me apparently.

A Bangkok Relationship Turns into a Family Obligation

I later learned A was from Nakhon Sawan and had a son that her mother took care of. She had come to Bangkok to provide for her family an extended family grandmother grandfather etc. as they were all very very poor. I don’t think A realized that I wasn’t exactly rich either. I was working for a minimum salary in a very labor intensive job.

I asked A “Where do you want me to drop you off in Bangkok?” She replied “I come airport with you tilac. You’re my boyfriend now.” My friends looked at me as if to say “What an idiot.” I said to her “Okay that’s fine if you want to come to the airport you can. We can have a meal before I leave.

When I was back home A was calling me every day actually some days every hour. I was missing Thailand now or was I missing A? I booked a second trip alone on Boxing Day and sent a screenshot of the ticket to A. My holiday was for 18 days that is the maximum time I could take off work. I sent her a message that said “I miss you and I’ll be there soon” but I didn’t hear back from her for over 2 days. When she did finally reply she said “I broke my phone but it works now. When you come here to Thailand?” I told her April 15th I will land early in the morning. A says “Okay I wait you. Can go Koh Chang. You want? Okay.” I said okay not knowing where Koh Chang was.

After a quick Google search I found a beach resort and booked it for 2 weeks as I was going to Pattaya for a few days to catch up with friends anyway.

The day finally came when it was time to head to the airport and back to the Land of Smiles. As soon as I arrived in Bangkok I jumped in a taxi and made my way back to the same hotel. After a quick shower and a change of clothes I headed out to Nana Plaza and back to the go go bar where I had met A. She was on stage dancing. As soon as she spotted me walking through the door she jumped off the stage ran over to me threw her arms around me and said “Hello tilac I miss you. I’m happy to see you again.

I said to her “Why are you working tonight? You promised you’d meet me at the airport.” To which A replied “I sorry tilac I have to work. Make money tonight. I can see you tomorrow.” I said “No you’re coming with me tonight. I will pay the bar fine.” This made her smile. She said “Okay tilac you go okay.” I said “We’re okay to go Koh Chang tomorrow remember?” “Okay” she said. As she’s pressing buttons on her mobile phone “You need to pay me this much tilac.

The 180,000 Baht Demand Returns

I looked at the digits on her phone 180000 baht. “You pay for me bar fine then I can go Koh Chang. No?” I said “I’m not paying anything. I told you before if boyfriend and girlfriend I don’t pay. I paid for the hotel already and the food. If you don’t want to come with me that’s fine I’ll go alone.

After my outburst A soon changed her tune. She said “No tilac it’s okay. You boyfriend me. You pay only 20000 baht. It’s okay for you.” Then she said “20000 baht for bar fine not for me. Just pay food and tip me. Okay.” That’s more realistic for 2 weeks I thought. So off we go. We had a fantastic trip felt like I was on a honeymoon every day. I was falling for A more and more and she was for me apparently.

Before I knew it the holiday was up and we were heading back to Bangkok so I could catch my flight and head home. “You come back for me again tilac? You go home save money can marry me take me Scotland okay tilac? I know butterfly come back for me.” “Of course I will” I said. I say “Remember it’s okay to dance and drink but don’t go with customer. You have boyfriend now.” “No problem” she said. “I wait you sure.” I smiled back at A and caught my flight back to Scotland sad and depressed.

Back home and missing A I scrimped and saved and booked another trip to Thailand the following year. Then the pandemic hit. We used to talk every other day then I lost interest. Sometimes I can’t be bothered. Because I eventually woke up and realized I am one of many. As the saying goes “It’s not your girl it’s just your turn.” I’ve realized I have been naive to think A was actually my girlfriend. Thinking about it she must have had several guys like me coming to Thailand on holiday and thinking that she was their exclusive girlfriend.

I finally told A that I knew what she was about and I didn’t want to have anything more to do with her. She went absolutely crazy on the phone and told me if I come back to Thailand she will have me done in or put in jail on some trumped up charge for a long time. Some Thai bar girls are really crazy you have to be careful. I’ve now deleted her off my Facebook and other social media pages.

I’m planning another trip back to Thailand when everything is back to normal. My friend said that I’m crazy because if she sees me she will try to set me up somehow. I have told them I will go straight to Pattaya not Bangkok. But they seem to think that all the bar girls are connected and she will find out where I am. I love Thailand and I’m not going to miss out on another trip just because of A’s threats. I’ll play it by ear but I’ve now learned my lesson. I’m a much wiser man.

An English Teacher Finds a Genuine Connection on Khao San Road

At the age of 30 I upped and left my boring single life in the UK for a year of backpacking and exploring Southeast Asia. This story happened when I was about 4 months into my trip. I had already visited Thailand Laos Cambodia Malaysia Vietnam for a month in each country. Whilst passing through Bangkok for the third time on this trip I was planning to be there three nights before making my way down to the Thai islands in the south.

On the first night I went out to a few bars with a guy I’d met in Vietnam a few weeks prior. He had not been to Bangkok before and I was keen to see some sites. After days of visiting the Grand Palace and Wat Pho we found ourselves on Khao San Road having a few beers in the bars there and ended up in a nightclub called The Club full of backpackers and young trendy types. The beers were flowing and we were having a great night. There were a lot of local girls in this club along with young Western backpackers. There was a good vibe loud dance music and it was very busy. Everyone looked to be having fun.

I was having a cigarette in one of those glass door cordoned off areas where you could smoke. I got chatting to one of the Thai girls who was with three other friends all in their 20s and very attractive. Most were a little shy at speaking to a farang but the girl I got chatting to was confident and friendly. Her English was pretty much perfect and we chain smoked a couple more cigarettes before going to the bar and getting another drink. It was all smiles and I sensed an obvious connection between us.

Over the last 4 months I had only ever met Western girls from Canada Australia and Europe who were also backpacking. So to converse with a Thai girl who spoke very good English was a refreshing change. The friend I was with just warned me to be careful as she was maybe a working girl pickpocket or a scammer. I was naturally quite curious as you should be with a stranger having my wits about me and I wasn’t too drunk. Her flirting and talking was great and the conversation flowed naturally. We all had a dance together and carried on drinking shots until the club shut.

I asked her what her plans were when we were out on the street and she made it obvious that she wanted to come home with me and asked where I was staying. She said goodbye to her friends and we walked back to my little guesthouse which was within walking distance from Khao San Road. We were walking hand in hand together grabbing some street food on the way. I decided to test the water with her status and said “Damn I only have 700 baht left.” To which she replied “That’s fine you don’t need any money” which put my mind at rest.

When we got back to the guesthouse the night porter started talking loudly to the girl and she handed over her ID. The conversation got a little heated and she handed over 500 baht to him. When we got to the room I asked what happened in the reception when voices were raised. She said the security said that local girls are not allowed to stay here unless they pay the guest joiner charge and “we treat all you working girls the same.” That made her very angry as she shouted at him saying she was not a bar girl and in fact she was an English teacher. Now I know why her English is so good.

An Honest Connection Continues Beyond the First Night

I immediately said I would give her the 500 baht back. She replied with a smile “No way I will pay this time. How about you pay tomorrow?” Right I thought that’s a good sign. I thought this was very honest of her and we continued to have a great night together.

In the morning I was quite hung over. We arranged to see each other the next evening for food and some drinks again. I honestly didn’t think she would turn up the next day. But sure enough after a lazy day of getting some washing done checking emails and some shopping she turned up at the restaurant area of my guesthouse and unbelievably she was on time. I was a little taken aback but had a quick shower and got changed and ready to go with her.

We went out for some Indian food. She paid for the whole meal. And now I was 100% convinced she was genuine with no hidden agenda. I insisted I pay for the rest of the night. We hit a couple of bars and shared a few cocktails then headed back to my guesthouse again. The same security guard was at reception and gave us a dirty look as we walked in. I paid him the 500 baht and walked up the stairs without saying anything. We had another great night of bedroom gymnastics and fell asleep in each other’s arms until morning.

We parted ways in the morning exchanging Facebook names and left with all smiles. What a fun couple of days it had been with no orchid or any mention of money being exchanged. The next day I flew down to Krabi and continued on my trip. We never saw each other again but kept in touch via Facebook. I saw on her profile that she was previously married to an English guy but now divorced and it was plain to me that she only liked Western men. This assured me that she had a professional career and that simply Western men were her type.

And again he’s absolutely right. A lot of people come here and assume that it’s only working girls here in Thailand and you can’t find a decent girl. There are girls here especially if you’re a younger guy. If you’re anywhere between kind of 24 to 30 even even a bit older there are girls here in Thailand who go out and they just want to have fun and they want to meet Western guys. And one of those places where you can meet those sort of girls if you’re a younger guy especially is Khao San Road. Typically it was a backpacker area in the ’60s and ’70s. It’s kind of very very commercialized now but it’s still a kind of younger person’s destination.