I Warned My Son About Thai Women for 17 Years

My son has spent most of his life listening to me tell him how not to behave in Thailand. He managed to ignore 17 years of advice in about 6 days.

My wife is Thai. We’ve been married 17 years and live in Louisiana. Our son, Tyler, is 24. Technically, he’s my stepson, but I’ve raised him since he was 7, so he’s my son as far as I’m concerned. He was born in Thailand, but remembers almost nothing about living there. His mother speaks Thai to him sometimes. He usually answers in English.

Last year, Tyler announced he wanted to go to Thailand alone. His mother thought this was wonderful. I had concerns. He’s a good kid, but he’s 24 and has the confidence of somebody who’s never yet had life properly slap him.

Before he left, I gave him the standard father speech. Don’t flash money around. Don’t rent a motorbike unless you know what you’re doing. Don’t start fights. Don’t fall in love after 3 days. Don’t lend anybody money. He rolled his eyes. His mother gave him one instruction, “Visit Grandma.”

Meeting Fah in Pattaya

Tyler landed in Bangkok and spent a few days there before going to Pattaya with some Americans he’d met. I could see where this was heading. Then he stopped answering my messages. His mother wasn’t worried. I was.

Eventually, he called. He was in a taxi. I asked where he was going. Khon Kaen. Why? He said, “Dad, it’s not like that.” Every father loves hearing that sentence. Apparently, Fah worked at a hotel. She wasn’t asking him for money. Her grandmother was sick, and she needed to go home.

Tyler had nothing planned, so he’d offered to go with her. I asked if he’d considered that he knew absolutely nothing about this woman. He said, “Mom didn’t know you once.” My own wife had apparently supplied ammunition against me.

I called her into the room. She spoke to Tyler in Thai. Then she asked to speak to Fah. They talked for about 10 minutes. My wife handed the phone back to me. I asked what Fah had said. She shrugged. “She seems okay.” Fantastic. Outvoted.

Fah’s Family and Thai Nickname Lek

Two days later, Tyler starts sending photographs. Village, buffalo, food, grandmother, half the family. He’s having the time of his life. Then my wife gets a message from Fah’s mother. I didn’t even know they’d exchanged numbers. Now the mothers are talking. This situation is developing far too quickly for me.

I asked my wife what they were discussing. She said, “Tyler.” Obviously. Then she tells me something Tyler hadn’t mentioned. Fah is 26. She’s studying for a master’s degree and works at the hotel while studying.

Her grandmother wasn’t dying. She’d had surgery on her knee. Tyler had made it sound like a medical evacuation. A week passes. Tyler is still there. I call him. He says he’s helping Fah’s uncle. With what? Building a chicken enclosure. My son has never built anything in his life. I once watched him struggle to assemble an office chair. Now he’s apparently agricultural labor.

Then he says something that almost finished me. Fah’s family has given him a Thai nickname. Lek. I asked why. Lek means small. Tyler is 6’3″. Apparently, the family thinks this is hilarious.

Maybe Wedding Next Year

I told him he needed to visit his actual grandmother before coming home. He said he would. 3 days later, he finally went. Fah went with him. This is where the story took a turn I wasn’t expecting.

My mother-in-law loved Fah. Absolutely loved her. She called my wife afterwards and said Tyler had finally brought home a good Thai girl. Finally? He’s 24. As far as I know, this is the first one.

Then my mother-in-law asked when Tyler was coming back to Thailand. My wife said she didn’t know. Her mother replied, “Maybe wedding next year.” I said, “Absolutely not.” My wife said nobody was getting married.

Tyler came home 2 weeks later. No tattoos, no missing passport, no mystery debt. He still had most of his money. I was almost disappointed that none of my predictions had happened.

Fah Visits Us in Louisiana

He and Fah are still together. Long distance. She visited us in Louisiana earlier this year. I like her. That’s actually the problem.

I was prepared for some disaster where I could sit Tyler down and say, “I told you so.” Instead, she’s intelligent, funny, and doesn’t tolerate his nonsense. My wife adores her. My mother-in-law already treats her like family.

And Tyler has become unbearable because he thinks this proves all my Thailand advice was useless. Last Sunday, he reminded me that I’d specifically told him not to fall for the first Thai woman he met. I said, “Give it time.” Fah was sitting at the table. She looked at me and said, “17 years.” My wife nearly fell out of her chair laughing. Apparently, they’ve been discussing me.

So, that’s where things stand. 17 years teaching my son about Thailand. He ignored me. Everything worked out, and somehow I’m the joke.